Has anyone here suffered intense insecurity and overcame it?

Question

What did it take? Im not even sure what my problem is. I dont remember ever being put down. I thought if I got to the root I could fix it but what if I cant discover that root? Im going to live a pathetic life unless this gets dealt with.

Answer 1

Hi TrofyWife !!!

Probably you either haven't take or given the chance to accomplish something, on your own. Usually when everything is given to one and the person doesn't have to go through much efforts to get what they want, they feel worthless, and incompetent.

Do some research on your own, don't ask any body or accept any help when searching, for something that really interest you. Then go and work at this project, think of it as your own.
For example start small, find something at home that needs to be done and commit to it. What ever the out come of it is, it will be your own experience, this will give you enough stamina to take upon other projects as well.

Watch your diet, exercise your body and your faith!!!
You'll soon find out how secure you can be about yourself and the things you can accomplish.
GOOD LUCK, GOD BLESS YOU

ALLIV Z

Answer 2

Yes, I like to think I did. While I was never "put down", my father would consider NOTHING I did good enough. I was supposed to be the first, the best, in everything I tried to do. Of course, that is impossible. It did not help that my body type did not conform to the standards of the day (still doesn't!), we were immigrants and had no money for nice clothes, etc.

However, as I matured, I realized that I have an excellent brain, I can look good if I let myself feel proud of myself and people LIKE me because I'm nice. So, each day I told myself a few good things about me, held my head up higher than anyone else, and STRUTTED out there to let the world know I was OK. Hope you find a way to do the same for yourself.

Answer 3

Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.



-Nelson Mendela(1994)





yes you can overcome your insecurity...it takes time, heartbreak, strength and courage...but you CAN do it....i stuggled with it for years, and it seemed like for no reason..i stummbled upon this speech a few years back and i use it as daily affirmation! good luck!

Answer 4

I have. I used to be crippled even by my insecurity. And I was absolutely miserable. What it took for me was sincerely wanting to get past it. I was sick and tired of being shy and insecure. So I started forcing myself to be in uncomfortable situations and to talk to people I was afraid to talk to. I put up a front of being outgoing and assertive. I pretended I wasn't at all insecure. Everybody believed it. And so they treated me as if I was that confident person I acted like. And eventually I began to BECOME that person. Slowly it became easier and easier to act assertive, because I was getting used to it. After a while, the voice in my head, telling me that I wasn't good enough and that nobody really liked me and that everybody secretly made fun of me, started to fade into the background. And I started being able to tell that voice it was wrong. And as that started happening, I started to recognize my own negative thinking and the negative influences of some of the people I hung out with. So I went to work on my mind. I started trying to catch myself when I started thinking defeatist thoughts and making myself turn it around into something positive. And I started limiting my contact with my negative friends and starting friendships with people who reaffirmed my self-worth. People who didn't critisize me or put me down. People who made it clear that they loved the whole me, even my worst faults. And now, I still don't know what it was that originally caused me to be so insecure, but I've mostly overcome it. I still have certain situations that petrify me, but I've learned how to deal with them. And I've got a wonderful husband who helps me keep it positive.

Answer 5

Yes. See my answer in psychology about the song "Change my way of living" and try it. It might help. If not, get professional help - living a pathetic life is not the answer - in fact there's no need for it!!!Good luck. I know you're worth more than that.

Answer 6

I used to get nervous around other people & feel like I was rushing conversations just to get out of them, but, I taught myself to just relax, to sit back, to use natural facial expression & realize that enjoying myself was what made the people around me the most comfortable not necessarily genius conversation, or impressive facts about myself.

Answer 7

That used to be me. I had low self-esteem--we're talking low. I couldn't look in the mirror or at ANY pictures that had my face or body in them.

I had to grow out of it. I had to throw myself upon situations I knew was out of my box. I went skydiving. I went on a cruise. I evolved to love who I was. It took 10 years, but eventually I'm to the point now where even at a HUGE weight, I'm happy with who I am.

Answer 8

yes tons of people. to get over it, establish a goal of some sort and try to accomplish it, once you do, you will have more confidence. Confindence is the key to being secure. once you know you can accomplish things that you thought you couldn't, you will have it

Answer 9

ah - please get help with a therapist. you can't get thru this alone. you want to improve - that's the first step. everybody is a little insecure now & then, but belief in yourself is key to feeling secure - also having a good group of friends that you can trust and who believe in you and accept you for who you are can help also. good luck!!

Answer 10

I hope I'm not pushing wrong buttons here, but in looking at your nickname I can find a place to at least start.

See a therapist, it will help :)