2006-12-27 06:27:36 · 9 answers · asked by amason1226 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
While we are not married we have been together just over 2 yrs. We have no children together however we both have children that we each have full custody of from previous marriages. We do live together, however don't have finances together (ex. house, car ownership, etc). I have always cared about him..and he has me..as far as I know. But we argue a lot..and even argue over what we are or are not doing with our kids. We are constantly threatening the other to get out..or that we're leaving (you get the point). I don't know..I love him to death..and we can be perfectly fine..then other times I can't take it anymore and I feel as tho I'm going to have a heart attack. I find certain things about his life odd as he does with mine. Part of me just also doesnt feel like I can ever care for his kids in the same way that I do my own. Is that possible? I hear people say they love their partner's kids..but is it really the same type of love and emotion that you have for your own?
2006-12-27 06:40:33 · update #1
Just because you still care for someone does not mean you need to stay with them. You were very vague about your post so I am going to make some assumptions here.....Do you find yourself feeling depressed more times than feeling happy? Do you cry more than you should? Do you find yourself thinking about another lifestyle than the one you are currently in? Do you find yourself getting angry too often and too easily? Do you at times feel disgusted with your partner and cannot stand to be around him or her at times? If these things sound like you, then it's time to leave the relationship. It is not healthy for one to have these emotions I just mentioned. I have been there too many times and just recently left my LT BF because I was feeling many of these feelings. Yes I still care and yes I still love him. But emotionaly I feel a lift and feel better.
2006-12-27 06:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like you already know the answer and solution to your problem. Take charge of your life, caring doesn't mean you should stay in a relationship that is not working. Don't make excuses or wait for him to drop the bomb on you so he'll be to blame. This is a big step to take but once you have taken it you will appreciate yourself more for having to courage to change your life for the better of you and your children. Good Luck and Prosperous New Year.
2006-12-27 14:48:01 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Although I'VE NEVER had 2 raise someone else's kids,I THINK u could love them.or try 2 love them like your own {even if they r not biologically yours.] iF U LUV THE SIGNIFICANT ,BIOLOGICAL, PARENT.U better make sure u love children 1st.Active pre parenting is almost a ness.attribute.U need to know what you r getting into 1st.If u can;t do it ,it is not a reason 4 splitting up if u have a future w/the biological parent.It may however, b a reason 2 stop living together.CHILDERAN GROW UP & MOVE AWAY & IF U RAISED THEM W GOODNESS.MORALS.VALUES.SECURITY.&loveLOVE & GOD they leave alot sooner than u think.So........without good communication u r never going to make it.The kids need 2 hv respect in thier home...They need 2 know they r surrounded with love.
2006-12-27 15:11:20 · answer #3 · answered by lilly l 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can not answer this however I just read what Jenn wrote and that makes so much sense and in the end you should ultimately be first and be happy because it's your life and even though you may still love him so much you need to wake up and be happy with your life, life is a gift and we should take care of it when it is ours. Wishing you the best with this.
2006-12-27 15:06:01 · answer #4 · answered by Angelheart68 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When you can no longer look in the mirror and honestly say you are happy. You can still care and not be in love and love is an important ingredient. You only have one chance at life so don't waste it being unhappy. Good Luck to you.
2006-12-27 14:36:04 · answer #5 · answered by Love2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When you're fed up with dealing with the crap. My ex put me through the ringer several times, and I finally realized that I may care, but he apparently didn't. They say that if you love someone, you'll put up with anything - I say that you shouldn't have to. If it's the same crap time and time again - whether you love him or not - it's obviously NOT going to change. It's time to put yourself first - they aren't going to.
2006-12-27 14:38:37 · answer #6 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you both still care i would suggest to try everything possible including couple counciling, if that doesn't work then you know it is enough
2006-12-27 14:38:05 · answer #7 · answered by smurf_punky 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are truly in love, then enough is never enough
2006-12-27 14:31:08 · answer #8 · answered by j_n_js_mommy 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
only you can answer that question... especially if you're not going to elaborate
2006-12-27 14:32:21 · answer #9 · answered by married2004 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋