I am currently a very happily married woman, however I have this problem. My husband's ex wife won't stop bothering me, She always trying to do the things I do, always wants to know what I"m doing or asks stupid random questions. Yet she claims she doesn't want to hear bout my husband and I life. She just makes me feel on edge and I really would like to kick her *** but I'm better than that. Anyone have advice?
2006-12-27 06:18:59 · 43 answers · asked by queenofthedam8705 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
+ Ask your husband what things really annoy her. Hope he can tell you a pile of them. Then start doing them and try to talk about nothing else to her. she will hopefully get frustrated and leave you alone. Maybe there is a song or sound that really gets to her(like fingernails on a chalk board and then get a recording of it and play it for background music) Tell her you think it is soothing and relieves your stress. This works pretty well for the tel la sales people also.
Good Luck
2006-12-27 06:25:22 · answer #1 · answered by Clamdigger 6 · 6⤊ 4⤋
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2016-05-06 00:51:25 · answer #2 · answered by Gilbert 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me, it sounds as if the ex is not ready to let go of her "old" family, or she may still hold a special place in her heart for your husband. She may claim that she doesn't want to hear about your lives, but in fact, that is what motivates her to stay involved with your family. Obviously, if children are part of the situation, she will need to stay in the picture. But, maybe you and your husband (if he's a willing party), can make an effort not to share personal details about what you're planning. For instance, you say she's interested in doing what you do. But, if you don't tell her that you're planning a vacation for two, headed out for the weekend, going here or there with the kids, she doesn't have the chance to mimic your activities. Even the simplest details (where you and your husband are going for dinner) can be used in the wrong way.
If you don't have children, then you are free and clear to cut her completely out of the picture. She is, after all, an ex-wife. And unless she and your husband have an agreement to stay extremely cordial, the less contact you have with her the better. She may have severe jealousy issues and you should block all contact until her "flame" for your husband dies out. If you find that she is still bothering you, consider changing your phone number (unlisted or blocked), or simply screen your calls. If she comes to the door, don't answer it. It's a simple matter of not allowing conversation to happen between the two of you. However, if you happen to meet in town, simply smile and continue on your way. You, after all, are the one with the happy marriage and the man you love!
2006-12-27 06:32:43 · answer #3 · answered by Mom-to-Sophie 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My advice is just ignore her. She may very well be jealous of you. My ex husbands' ex was like that. She always wanted to know from other people about our relationship, but didn't have the guts to ask herself. You need to just continue doing what you are doing and not give her the attention she is requesting. You will find that the more dignity you show the more you will be respected by your family. Thank you and good luck.
2006-12-27 06:26:52 · answer #4 · answered by cookie 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your husband needs to get this situation under control and tell her to back off and stay out of your life and business. Some ex's try and want to be friends with the new ones but it doesn't sound like this is the case. If she wanted to be a true friend she wouldn't get upset about hearing about you and her ex husband. I think she is simply being a busybody and prying to find out whats what. Tell hubby to get her out of the picture.
2006-12-27 06:22:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
boy do you have a problem i had the same a few years ago ,she turned out to be a nightmare ,but it all turned out she was jealous she wanted him back ,,,over my dead body ,what you need to do is this ////love your husband and the kids ,with all your heart and show them this love and if you can let her see it too treat them like kings and queens ,,it will piss her off more than ever for her to know that in you he has the total love ,more than she could ever show or have shown him or the kids,make your family the main priority over anything else ,,,and mean it it is not hard to do when you truely love some one and the thing is the more love you show them the more they show it back to you ,your husband will realise you are the best in the world and he will be the one to eventully realise just what this woman is doing ,he wont want any little thing to upset the love he has for his family ,,,he will vend up telling her to get lost ,,and to keep her nose out ,dont answer her questions and if you do always bring the love into it ,,,tell her you are so pleased she didnt want him as with out him you would never have known such love ,,,,,,really pile it on hehe ,,,she will soon get sick of hearing that hehe ,,,,love is the answer sweetie ,,,this is what i did and we have more love in our family than you would ever imagine possible ,,,but its there and its great ,,,and as for her well she got so sick of it ,,,,shes just married a man she dont love ,,,,well she cant shes been sleeping with his mate ,,,he will find out and she will be history again hehe ,and if her name gets mentioned the first thing my husband says is ,,god only knows what i ever saw in the woman,,,,let her see who happy you are and how happy you make him and the kids,,,play with her mind ,,,,and strong love will do it for you ,,,she will hate the thought that you can giv him more than she ever could after all shes the one who is the ex hahaha
2006-12-27 06:33:52 · answer #6 · answered by whitecloud 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What you might do is tell her that you presently are unable to talk however when you have a moment you will get back to her.
Don't call as you know she will call you anyhow. What you are doing is good for you but you don't need an android to be a complete copy of you. You don't have to answer what your doing even though you can be respectful of her requests advise her you don't want a clone of yourself.
the other thing is that you really do not have to respond.
Just let her know that don't know. From one moment to the next what you will be doing or what you are doing.
Ta da.
Advise her that you are a very busy woman and just have to go.
Wishing you all the best of luck
what a pain that must be always having her in your face.
Good luck my lady
2006-12-27 06:22:40 · answer #7 · answered by Spirit_Rain_3-SunShineAries 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
well, that is cause she was the controlling factor when she was married to your husband.Even though the marriage is over she still wants to play strict mommy with him.
He needs to back you up and stand up to her and tell her to back off.
Look the kids are hers too and some things you will have to just deal with when it comes to them, but its yours and his home and when the kids are there they live under your rules,not hers.
If he doesn't want to say anything then Next time she calls let her know point blank. "look lady I don't know you I don't want trouble between us especially for the sake of the kids, so I tell you what, you keep mind to your business and I will do the same.If you are calling and wanting info on anything other than the kids I am sorry but I will hang up the phone on you no matter how many times you call.
So its up to you, we either be civilized adults here or we have problems that will only lead to more grief for all.Whats it going to be??"
Stand your ground and she will back off. maybe not right away but trust me she will get tired of not getting anywhere and stop the crap.
2006-12-27 06:30:42 · answer #8 · answered by vmaxer85 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There are alot of complications with relationships. It may also depend on how close they were before and the kids. She's there forever so she may do what ever it takes to keep testing you.
Hopefully she isn't that ignorant where she would try anything with the kids.
But she may be just getting used to everything. It may have already been awhile but kill her with kindness. They say it but it may work. So will have nothing bad to say and may get irritated and then stop. Worth a shot.
Good luck.
2006-12-27 06:29:39 · answer #9 · answered by afj60 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well if it gets to the point of hitting she needs to get away from you!! She has to see the anger you showing when your upset! Try to avoid her as much as possiable. Talk to your husband about it and maybe he can give you something to help you out with her! The X's are always hard to get rid of. Just stay calm, if your husband loves you and he's not going anywhere she should understand and move on with her life! But first it sounds like she needs to get a life!! Good Luck!
2006-12-27 06:25:23 · answer #10 · answered by alirette70301 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋
If you don't want her to bother you anymore, tell her, " Look you
are my husband's ex and I really don't want to be rude but I have nothing in common with you and I would appreciates if you wouldn't bother me anymore. I don't know where you got that I wanted to be your phone buddy but I'm very busy and I would certainly appreciate it if you wouldn't call back anymore". Then block her number from your phone if she goes elsewhere and calls you when you see it's her just slam the phone down.
2006-12-27 06:28:43 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋