my relationship is falling apart, how do u know if you should keep trying to make it work. I woke up this morning realizing that maybe its my fault for our breakup, well see i guess i should just clarify the situation between me and my ex bf-- well we dont live together or anything like that... see he goes out like 24/7 with his boys but when i want to go out and hang out with my friends he doesnt allow me to.. he calls my phone constantly and tells me to go home... also when he is home he calls me and talks to me all day but when he is out with his boys he is rude and disrespectful and hangs up on me alot.... so whats the deal here?
2006-12-27 05:22:47 · 22 answers · asked by nasreen682002 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You've made the right choice. He needs to continue to be your X. Please dont EVER consider such behavior (as his) to be your fault!
You deserve a life. And NOT someone who gives you directives.
I dont mean to be harsh, but that is not a relationship. At least not a positive, loving, enjoyable relationship.
If he's out with his boys 24/7, when does he have time to call you???
2006-12-27 05:31:38 · answer #1 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, it seems that this relationship has already fallen apart for whatever reason and people do tend to second guess themselves after it's all over and wonder if it was their fault. I think it all boils down to the fact that this guy was not right for you and now it is time to move on. Evaluate the situation only to learn from your mistakes but not to go back in hopes to salvage what may already be lost. Ask yourself what you wanted from a relationship and if he comes back don't settle for less.
2006-12-27 05:48:34 · answer #2 · answered by gmr321 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The deal is you are being a fool, don't take it personal but why are you allowing a man to control your life? Do you like being controlled? This guy needs to hit the bricks and get a life. You are your own woman with direction. You have to set examples on how to be a strong, intelligent woman, you never know who is looking up to you. Set the tone and be a DIVA that you are, you are worth much more than that, don't allow anyone to steal your joy or invade your space.
2006-12-27 05:28:36 · answer #3 · answered by uneekqamar2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, wow, why are you with this guy? I would say he is acting rather horribly, but you aren't being to smart by being with him if he can't straighten his act up. Although, from personal experience, sometimes these things work both ways, is there a reason he acts that way? If so, i would say you both have some things to work on and it's both your fault. The only way to go about it is to seek help, if it's that important to fix or maybe you two might just need to move on if not.
2006-12-27 05:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by 13CherryBlossoms 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what you have said here, he's a baby, and a control freak. If you are thinking of marrying this guy, he's not husband nor father material--- for sure have no children with him.... you'll be at home, and he'll be gone.... you may as well become a single mom. So, stay on the pill, hon...... In your place, I'd be looking around, that is if I were interested in finding a marriage partner. If you aren't, use him. But for sure, don't have kids with this one.... save the baby for a mature man.
2006-12-27 05:29:02 · answer #5 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is only your fault because you would rather be with someone like him rather than being alone. However, by the sound of it, you are with him and alone, which is also your fault. The abuse wont stop, it will only get worse if you continue with this relationship. He treats you as if you are a child, yet all you can think about is who's fault it is. Well, simply put,IT IS YOURS!
2006-12-27 05:29:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drop the bum. If he treats you badly around his friends or when he is with his friends he doesn't respect or love you......If he feels there are different standards for women and men, then he is an idiot. He wants his cake and be able to eat it to....You said he doesn't allow you to go out with your friends....what are you 10, and he's your daddy. No way would I allow someone else to tell me I couldn't spend time with my friends, and I certainly wouldn't let someone be mean to me just so he can feel more in control around his friends.....like I said DROP HIM....You have said absolutely nothing that says he loves you, only that he wants to control you, and make you feel bad........Don't let anybody treat you that way, ever.........
2006-12-27 05:30:25 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is not fair for you. Plus you should let him know this as well that, you dont like it when he hangs out with his boys and you dont get to do the same. but i guess its not your fault hes stupid enough to give more importance to his friends than you.
2006-12-27 05:29:56 · answer #8 · answered by Rutul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm an indian...may i post a tradtional indian perspective???
what u have narrated i too silly to be called a trouble at all....
if he's after you when u attmpt to go out; that could read his sirit and tune....u cannot call it a trouble...
and the other side ...that he dosent get to u while with his friends...that could be a slight problem even if u call it so...
the only way out in such a situation is to discuss these things with him...tell him that u would leave him if he intends to continue in this manner...i belive, he would mend his ways....
happy life...CHEERS!!!
2006-12-27 05:32:04 · answer #9 · answered by Manu Govind 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is an issue of fault. It is an issue of what you want. If you want to be treated as kept pet, then this is the guy for you. If you want to be treated as human being, then who care's whose fault it is, it is not relevant, you need to move on to someone better.
2006-12-27 05:27:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋