Women: DO you agree that you could forgive your spouse cheating if he didn't blame it on you?

Question

No one expects them to be perfect and I could just as well do the same thing but the problem is that they blame it on you.

Answer 1

I wouldn´t forgive him no matter what the reason.

Answer 2

Cheating is horrible no matter what excuse they give. But I understand what you are saying in the manner that they blame the other spouse for their own rotten behavior. Keep in mind that it is not just men who cheat and it is not just men that blame the other one for their acts of betrayal. Women do it too. It is a way to try to justify their behavior. No one can make any one do or not do something. It is by their own choices. That is a cop out to make what they are doing o.k. It is not ok under any circumstance to be unfaithful. Not for a man nor for a woman. I do not know if I could forgive my man if he cheated on me. I love him enough to try to get passed it but it is so hard once that trust is broken. Especially if they are not willing to take the responsibility for their actions. Not every situation is the same and it is easy to say that if my man cheated then I would just toss him to the curb but I am not in that situation and so I can not tell you what I would do. I know that I probably could not just walk away that easy and I would hope that my marriage was worth fighting for. Love can hurt a lot and no one is perfect but I pray that my husband has better morals than to ever cheat on me.

Answer 3

When someone blames cheating on their spouse, it means the cheater knows he/she is wrong. It's a defense mechanism. I don't know about the forgiveness thing. People have different definitions of forgiveness. Some people say "forgive and forget" meaning you should keep the person in your life. However, I disagree because this leaves you open to get hurt again. I think "forgiveness" means letting go of the anger. I think it could be possible to let go of the anger. My example (not related to cheating) is my mother-in-law. We found out she was using meth. Consequently, she is prohibited from contact with our 2yo daughter (who she was watching while coming down off a high, we found out days later). Anyway, I'm no longer angry. I've forgiven her for her poor judgement (which tends to be repeated). She's not a bright person and is an addict. I hope she heals herself. However, to let her watch our daughter would be to betray our daughter. She's not safe. In a similar way, you could forgive your spouse (let go of the anger, I'm not saying even that's easy), maybe even give him another chance. However, to continually forgive recurrent behavior is allowing yourself to be a doormat. I'm all about forgiveness because of my religious beliefs, but you should also take care of yourself. You can feel peace without allowing someone else to hurt you.

Answer 4

if he blames it on u, he isn't taking any of the responsibility for his own choice. if he blames it on u, u have two hurts to get over, as in laying the blame on u he is saying u caused him to do it, and that there was something wrong with u. no u can never forgive a spouse that blames u, now if they were willing to take responsibility and were repenting, than u could get past it, and forgive them. but in blaming u it has created two different hurts.

Answer 5

i could forgive my Bf if he cheated on me even if he did blame it on me.. I know everyone makes mistakes.. I know i could forgive him cause i have been there an i know he can forgive me cause he has been there.. We both blamed each other i blamed him for not being there he said he done it to get back at me.. So my answer is YES

Answer 6

If I had a cheating spouse, he best not even go there with trying to blame his affair on me. I'd put the blame right back on him and that'd be the end of us.

Answer 7

Why would a cheating husband blame his infidelity on his wife? Thats a horrible excuse. And no I would not forgive my husband for cheating on me, as long as he didn't blame me. I would hope that my husband has enough respect to not cheat on me. Or atleast seperate/divorse me before he ever slept with another woman. If he weren't happy with the sex, then that is something he would need to come to me and we would talk about.

Answer 8

I do not think that I would be able to forgive my spouse if he did that to me. It would not matter to me or not if he blamed it on me b/c it was all his doing! I would not be able to see the reason behind the cheating so I would have to say good bye to whatever marrige I had left.

Answer 9

Maybe, but the problem would be that I would blame me. I'd always be wondering what I did to deserve this and blaming myself whether it was true or not!

Answer 10

I dont know thats a tough one,it would depend. if he keeps it from me and i have to find out from someone else or who it was with.but if he blamed it on me i would defiantly be done with the marriage because no makes someone else cheat.

Answer 11

There is NOWAY in H**L I would ever forgive my husband if he cheated on me! First, Why would it be your fault if your husband chose to cheat on you? It wouldn't! Second, Men always claim it's not your fault! No sh**t it's not your fault.
If a man chooses to cheat on his wife...it's his fault, not his wife's fault, not the women he was with fault, not his buddies fault....It was his fault!!! No Excuses!!! Why would you forgive him? You don't need a man that is going to cheat give him up and move on.