I have left a question of tonight "Lost my trust fo her" as my wife explained she had an afair with her boss for nearly two years. It may well be she was placed into the situation that her boss took advantages of her for her employment, she won't talk about it any more and I don't want to ask her any more questions as she already confessed to me about. However I have felt my wife is so conservative when we have sex as something left a dark hole in her life as there is no intimacy between us. It seems unusual that I have never seen her p...y, she does not like any french kissing or let alone oral sex. With all the love I have for her it seems I am still paying the price for her past.
2006-12-27 02:59:18 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The affair happened 2 years before I met her.
2006-12-27 03:03:48 · update #1
leave her. What she did is not your problem it's hers.
2 years is a long time. She is an idiot
2006-12-27 03:01:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
What alot of people don't understand is that you can't just stop loving a person over night unless you never did love them from day one. I would like to say that from a womans prespective (me), your wife is not being honest with you any more than she is with herself. I think that although at one point in time she cared deeply for you even loved, she doesn't feel that way now, she has some issues that need to be worked out such as trust, intimatcy, and vocality. Understand that although she's still with you she's absent (emotionally) there is a disconnect and that there is only security in being with you. If I may say so I would like to say it is best you leave her on a bases that you all remain in a respectable friendship or agree to talking and cousleing, it's better to do so before things become bitter hostility. You will never truely know her side because you have made it clear she is conservative with her emotions and other things. Good Luck!
2006-12-27 03:08:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is going to take some serious therapy to get over. You must decide if you are willing to go through that to get the sex life that you want. If not, you need to move on...especially if you have no kids. Also, you may want to make sure she is not having an affair behind your back. That may where she's getting her fill and why she is so withdrawn from you.
2006-12-27 03:07:42 · answer #3 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell her that she better talk to you and tell you why she doesn't want to have all the fun and great things in bed with you when she is having an affair with her boss. The fact that it happened before you met her is no reason for you to lose your trust in her, but i would suggest that you ask her to open up to you and let you please her or you won't be able to handle this crap too much longer
2006-12-27 03:05:20 · answer #4 · answered by wantstoknow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears that they is great impediments to communication in your relationship. Neither one of you have apparently been able to discuss important issues together, including those surrounding intimacy.
If you are still interested in overcoming the challengings you have in this relationship, I would recommend seeing a profession marriage therapist to help both of you overcome obstacles in your relationship.
Once trust has been broken through cheating, it certainly can be a dagger into any relationship. However, it isn't necessarily the end of it. Trust can be restored, but it will take time and hard work. Both of you need to be committed to the relationship and bot of you need to be open and honest in your communication, and both of you need to be consistent in your behaviors toward one another.
2006-12-27 03:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a big problem. You need to get help ASAP.
Love is not the problem, but you sex life is. Never seen it and you are married. You have a big problem. Yes, some people are not into oral sex, but never seen the p...y is strange. She might be a man, or something else. Get help fast.
2006-12-27 04:28:41 · answer #6 · answered by harold 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should go to counseling and try to figure out why there is such a dark hole. 9 time sout of 10, there is way more to this situation than she is telling and it's probably because she is embarrassed or doesn't want to hurt you more than she has. Getting her to talk about what is truly bothering her is the first step to getting over it.
2006-12-27 03:18:05 · answer #7 · answered by Dazed and Confused?? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women feel bad and guilty even if they have done nothing wrong so imagine what she is feeling now...when you said "With all the love I have for her it seems I am still paying the price for her past" it sounds great, tell her (gently).
You may want to ask yourself what you want for yourself now, and and her too. Half a relationship is no relationship at all.
2006-12-27 03:20:30 · answer #8 · answered by Frederic R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it happened 2 years before you met her then her past is her past just like you probably had sexual relations also before you met her... Let it go.... holding on to the past could be what is causing you problems now
2006-12-27 03:08:30 · answer #9 · answered by susiefila 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My spouse. Its heartbreaking yet its basically thoroughly long previous. can no longer split up nonetheless because of the fact I even have been smitten via this individual for years and years and for us to social gathering became basically the terrific element ever and now i'm addicted desire to a drug and could't carry myself to split from.
2016-10-28 11:25:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not a wife. Divorce her and move on. Be sure to get her on tape talking about the affair for your lawyer and judge also.
What a c**t.
2006-12-27 03:05:19 · answer #11 · answered by Gasman 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋