I got a restraining order against him two years ago because he roughed me up pretty good. Since then we have attempted to reconcile, several times, only I have found out he has been with several woman duing this time while we were together. He snuck around, lied, called them daily, had sex with them, accused me of affairs I have never had, I been with one man for 35 years, and I have never had sex with anyone else. I have caught him in numerous lies, caught him in bed with another woman, caught him with another woman on two more seperate occasions, he called the police on me when I caught him with another woman. He said "he wouldn't call it off until he knew he had a wife," I said he can't have a wife with other women " Who is the bigger fool? I want as much feed back as possible......
2006-12-26 19:57:07 · 15 answers · asked by BROKENANDUSED 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Obviously not.
Go find another man worth your time.
2006-12-26 20:00:11 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Now you really know the answer to all the questions that you're asking. You know that you should have been gone so long ago that you could hardly remember his name. But the problem is that you still love him or think that you do. You have to give yourself a chance, and once you can divorced this dependency on him you Willl find that you didn't feel what you thought you did about him. You wil be surprise to learn that there is a big world out there and so many people will treat you as the woman you are. Your man treat you this way because he knows he can, and he will never have any respect for you. One day you will get enough, and only you can decide when, you will be gone.
You make sure that when you finally leave, don't come back. I will never call you a fool, I've been through the same thing, and when I got over it I was reborn. I thought I could never live without the man. I was wrong. I realized that I loved him more than I loved myself, and when you do that how can anyone love you. I prayed to get over it, it was hard but I did it. You can too, pray and pray. I don't know you but I will pray for you. I wish you the very best and may god be with you.
2006-12-26 20:28:00 · answer #2 · answered by Jacci 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suspect that the fact that you are asking whether or not you should waste any more of your precious life worrying about this looser that ruffed you up is an indication that you have some serious psychological problems. Perhaps you should spend some time examining yourself and how you feel about yourself and you may wish to seek some professional advice. Speak with friends and clergy and anyone that can help you see that you must be out of your damn mind even contemplating resuming a relationship with a man that has always treated you like **** and has even gone so far as to become violent with you.
2006-12-26 20:22:20 · answer #3 · answered by gaijinojiisan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only mistake you made is in your attempts to reconcile. You have one life to live and I suggest you start now. Forget this loser. Live every day now like it is your last (because if you stay with him it might be). You write like you have a brain... (more than most on here).. now start using it!
Who is the bigger fool? You already know the answer to that.. but you can change it within one day. Change your life! Do not accept him back under any condition. The only thing holding you back from a happy life is lack of courage and lack of self esteem.. Work on those!
2006-12-26 20:04:47 · answer #4 · answered by mosaic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a long time you have been with him, he must be good in some ways or you would not stay that long, so look to his good side and ignore his other side. He will grow out of it and in the end, you can look after him while he is sick in bed. If you caught him with two that means there is more out there somewhere and they are all having a grand old time, but they dont have to do his laundry etc, but you might get insurance money for your old age, soooo I really dont know what you should do. oh, I think you are the bigger fool
2006-12-26 20:07:48 · answer #5 · answered by spuds_suds 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats 35 years too long. At this pont I am not sure there is even a love left there. I think it may be more about dependancy. Not trying to be rude. I think you have put up with it long enough. It's time to take control back of your life. I would leave, there is noway he can truly love you and treat you like crap at the same time. Sorry, but its time to move on. All he wants is a woman he can push over, and still have fun on the side. Collect what left of yourself and move on. After this long, he will never truly give you all of him. Good Luck
2006-12-26 20:05:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHY, would you want to stay with a man like that??? He is no good! Kick him out of your life. Go find another guy who will appreciate you and treat you well! He roughed you up, he cheated on you, he lied to you, u caught him doing the ´deed´ with another women. What more do you want him to do to you?! Leave him and move on! You deserve better! He doesnt respect you, and sooner or later you going to loose your respect for yourself. Before that happens, look in the mirror, look at yourself, you not the bad one.... be happy!
2006-12-26 22:14:14 · answer #7 · answered by BadGirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be afraid to be alone---you are better off. Divorce is not the end only the beginning. If people knew what you went through, they would understand. Life is too short. You don't want this sham of a marriage to be your only achievement in life. Get out and find happiness.
By the way, he doesn't love you...you are just a security blanket for him. Yank it out from under him.
2006-12-26 20:45:52 · answer #8 · answered by tbonz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i think you have already answered your own question, with out really saying anything "NO you shouldnt........"
Go back and read what you wrote, read it twice three times if need be. The more you read it the more your going to ask your self, gee why would i wanna take a loser like that back.
If you have been separated this long, why get back ? Move on and find you real MR.RIGHT. His out there trust me , but you wont find him unless you look. Staying with a loser like your husband gives you notthing but pain. he beat on you once he will do it again. YOUR MUCH BETTER THAN THAT.
2006-12-26 20:06:41 · answer #9 · answered by Porcelain Doll 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU cant be serious?
IS your mother still alive?
If someone asked YOU this question you would check them into a room with soft walls and one of those hug me jackets.
This guy and the police department did you a favor...
what is going on in your life that you would even ask such a question?
2006-12-26 20:01:31 · answer #10 · answered by lisa s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.......I would say that would be you! Can you tell me one reason that you are still married to him???? One thing that he adds to your life in a positive way???? By your own admission, he is a liar, a cheat and an abuser.....so why in God's name would you want to stay married to him.....wake up...think better of yourself....get a divorce and move on....good luck
2006-12-26 20:40:39 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋