Ok I have two bestfriends for which I known for years. Last year I introduce them to each other and since then... they are always together. They go out together, they talk on the phone for hours, they tell sercets to each other, they go on double dates, they travel together and ect. Me...thinking this is the greatest thing ever for my two bestfrinds to get along but lately I been feeling felt out because they don't call me like they use too and they don't tell me anything anymore. I talked to them about it but they would always said "we love you" but I think that's just to pity me, you know not wanting to hurt my feelings. I don't know what to do....what should I do.. I don't want to stop being there friends and I don't want to have a new year worrying about my bestfriends not being my bestfriends anymore. It may sound like I'm jealous about the bonding they have with each other but I just really feel like the third person in this relationship..I feel like I don't belong.
HELP!!!!
2006-12-26 14:49:37 · 17 answers · asked by Salome D 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
i have had this happen to me last year....i have to admit i get jealous of my best friend when she hangs out with some1 else besides me because we are ALWAYS together! but all i can tell u is to confront them and tell them how u feel....and b like yall havent hung out with me in a long time....see if one of them wants to spend the nite or do something together! just ask the other best friend to hang out the next weekend then maybe yall could all be friends again like the way it should be....i kno exactly how u feel......it suxs! but just bare through it and just dont hurt anyone's feelings even though ur's are getting hurt....tell them that! and if they say "i love u" say i kno yall do but yall just are always together and i never get to do anytthing with yall anymore! hopefully they will realize it and hopefully it will get better!
2006-12-26 14:56:07 · answer #1 · answered by xjenniloux :] 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well it does sound like they are now eachother's best friend. Perhaps you should just accept the fact that you are now only "good friends" with them...especially since you've already talked to them about it. I mean if you've said it once...that's more than enough...you don't want to harp on this...if you do they might not want to be friends with you anymore at all (it would make them feel uncomfortable to be around you)
You should look at this as a good opportunity. A chance to get out there and meet new people. Your new best friend is out there.
Stuff like this happens sometimes in life. You don't want to sound desperate or have people think that you can't take life in stride and find new friends. I'd just accept it and move on.
2006-12-26 14:58:39 · answer #2 · answered by brittany 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to them again, I'm sure everything is O.K. Maybe you should start asking them to do stuff more often or call them more often. The same thing happened to me years ago, I talked to them about it and 6 years later we are still all 3 best friends!! When I felt that way I stopped calling them as much and everyone almost got hurt!!
Good Luck!!!
2006-12-26 14:57:14 · answer #3 · answered by shannon h 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you feel left out you should create ways for the three of you to bond together. Like instead of calling them up and talking to them you should invite them over your house or get them to do things with YOU.
Or if that doesn't work you might want to spend time with one one them without the other around. That way you can work on making your relationships with them stronger one at a time instead of trying to get them both to hang out with you more at the same time.
2006-12-26 14:52:24 · answer #4 · answered by Tasha 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
. .Apparently you were not prepared for just how much these two have in common. Don't worry sweetie, they both still thank you for introducing them to each other. Perhaps you don't have as much spare time on your hands as they do. Just go with the flow, and don't try to be competitive.You are who you are, just remember, there ain't no Hitch on a Hearse, enjoy life, just don't get to crazy
2006-12-26 15:10:57 · answer #5 · answered by Cheryl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is tough when friends do things like this. Maybe you need to meet new people and make new friends. Paticipate in new things. Go to dance lessons, join a book club, etc. people change & unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about it. Call up old friends & get re-aquainted.
2006-12-26 14:56:47 · answer #6 · answered by barefoot }i{ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well seems like your in an intresting situation.if i were you i would tell them how i feel and if they "pity" you. tell them that you and them arent friends anymore.hey honey i can tell its hard to lose a friend but when they treat you like your an acquaintance they really arent your friends.i no how it feels when your friends leave you out and the i tried to fix it by talking it out and it just lead to more problems so just forget about them! find new friends that are trustworthy and that share your intrests.
2006-12-26 15:04:37 · answer #7 · answered by thedemonofthehiddenmist 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through this a year ago myself. You can still be friends with them but maybe foster other friendships and/or try and hang out with them one at a time? Did you tell them you felt excluded?
2006-12-26 14:55:11 · answer #8 · answered by |\/|@ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are sounding like a party pooper. Try having more fun and stop being so worried that your friends are excluding you. They would only exclude you if you truly become a bore or a nag. Lighten up and have some fun.
2006-12-26 14:50:59 · answer #9 · answered by Plasmapuppy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u have done a great service and they'll be eternally gratefull now dont ruin it by being a third wheel. get new friends (whithout forgetting them) and help them too, and keep helping mankind.
ps:
couples usually hang out with other couples it's just nature, there's no pitty they do love you.
2006-12-26 14:54:33 · answer #10 · answered by Daniel S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋