The problem is, if this guy doesn't actually like me, then our whole friendship circle -- which is exactly the same and comprises of about 50 people (I live in university)-- then I will be the laugh of the town, mostly for being gay... Reputation is pretty much everything up where I live, and while a lot of people would understand, it'd be a shock to some of the others...
I'm actually attracted much more to women than guys, but every once in a while someone's personnality will strangely mark me in that way... And this guy does that. I really fancy him.
Both he and I go out with lots of girls (and love it), but I recon there's a good chance he's also got a little queer part to him. I cannot be sure though.
What to do? Maybe there are cunning ways of getting around this whole problem? That's why I'm asking you...
2006-12-26 13:13:40 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Why jump ship? In other word you and him go after the punani (which I prefer) and now it seems you want to hunt him down for a little one on one. I would say the BEST bet is to have a three way with both of you and a chick, work your way to him. You know the rest.
2006-12-26 14:38:54 · answer #1 · answered by bandgeekmafia13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being in the closet ( as this scenerio sounds) can be a very difficult situation especially when negotiating around the idea that just because you find one man attractive doesnt mean that you necessarily are gay. What I would want to know before giving advice is how much do people in general that you socialise with know about bi sexuality and sexuality in general. And if the people involved do not know all that much about bisexuality or they have a vague notion that it is only acceptable between two woman gendered people, or that it involves swinging, or any number of other mis conceptions, then I would probably say clear of declaring your bisexuality to other people in the group. If however, the people are intelligent enough to realise that many people are bisexual and have any range and number of bisexual attractions (whether they act on them or not, is neither here nor there), then I would discuss bisexuality around the group.
In regards to the person you are attracted to, I would suss out how much he knows about bisexuality and about sexuality in general. Then, I would say there is this interesting film on (that is or has a positive gay relationship featured in it, or even (god forbid if this exists) a film about a bisexual man with a positive message about bisexuality as the main feature). I do not know, personally off hand of a movie like this, but I am sure you could google it. This is a starting point.
2006-12-26 20:44:25 · answer #2 · answered by Orditz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever let fear hold You back. How are You going to evolve if You do not take either the initiative in Your relationships, or the responsibility for Your own actions?
Do You really think that there are not at least one or two of Your friends who have not already wondered about Your sexuality?
Stop fooling Yourself and start fooling around!
2006-12-26 13:22:02 · answer #3 · answered by Ashleigh 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time he says or does something you find attractive, tell him you wish you could find a girl like him. Just plant that little seed and leave it at that. If it's mutual and grows into something, great! Otherwise, no big deal and things go on as they have been.
2006-12-26 15:04:53 · answer #4 · answered by John's Secret Identity™ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you truly like the guy, not declaring it to a minimum of someone will hassle you many more desirable than the effects of popping out and immediately-out telling him. as well, once your individuals locate out, in the journey that they are genuine friends they are going to settle for you for who you're and under no circumstances decide you because of your sexuality.
2016-10-16 21:46:18 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋