Socially Inept?

Question

I feel socially inept. I am a very shy person, who doesn't go around talking to people at school. I feel like I have no friends, and wish to be able to be more talkative. PLEASE HELP!! I'm so so shy, cannot help it. Get very nervous in some conversations with some people.

The question is, how do I change this?

Answer 1

the only way to change is to face what you fear the most. and that is interaction with people you don't know. the only way to get comfortable is to interact with them. it will be really hard at first. start with one person and work your way up to more.
try to find someone who looks like they have similar interests as you. everyone wants to belong. nothing feels better than connecting with another person who shares their point of view.

Answer 2

Join a club or group that interests you. In that type of situation, you won't have to make so much "small talk" because the topic of the group or club will lend itself to conversation. It's also a good way to find other people who have similar interests as you.

Most of all- don't put too much pressure on yourself. EVERYONE has insecurities, even the people you get nervous around. Good for you for asking for help!

Answer 3

you know what? i was just like you when i was your age at school. and when i first got to college, i thought it would be exactly that. instead, and during my experiences at college and university, i got to know a few people because they were very mature, respectable of whom we had a few things in common in terms of likes and dislikes.
i'd advise you to join a after school club or society at college. meet people, ask questons, talk amongst yourselves, get to know each other well. the more you do this, the more you'll grow in confidence and stature. during break at school or college hang out with a few of your classmates and start a conversation with them. i'd say, don't worry about it- as you get older and become more independent and be able to take care of yourself, would you be able to confront this problem and address it head on

Answer 4

This may seem extreme, but take a speech class. You will be nervous as hell, but it will do great things for helping you be more outgoing with others. It will boost your confidence, especially, is you try really hard and practice on speeches. Trust me, I did 2 years of competitive speech and debate in high school, and it really makes a difference.

Answer 5

Good job. Do the same thing as you did here. Just make one friend first. Initially you should be a good listener to maintain your friendship.
Don't worry you will make few friends

Answer 6

u need to put yourself out there more by going to social activities, join a sports team, take a karate class. your insecurities is quite common. u need to realize that confident people feel insecure sometimes.

Answer 7

You don't really have to talk, just listen. Of course, you have to break the ice first. Are there any other shy people in your social circle? try starting a conversation with one of them. You could say something like, "I hate being shy, don't you?"

Someone: you're nobody but a mean, nasty person.

Answer 8

it sounds wierd but get a job as a server/waiter. This forces you to talk to strange people all the time. It really helped me, and I was the same way you are.

Answer 9

You have Social Anxiety Disorder.

Answer 10

[e-mail]
Well glad to see I'm not the only one. I'm not very talkative either. I feel if I do talk people won't listen or they won't understand. But it's cool to not be cool. The only friend I need is Jesus Christ. He's a loyal, faithful friend and he's always there when I need him. But let me tell you the best place to make friends is at church.Guaranteed. Peace.