i WAS in relationship with a guy i loved the most from all guys i met in my life.he says he loves me like no1 ever will and that he wants to marry me and hav family, but also,he is the person,who hurt me most in my life.Thru our relationship i was put down a lot,mentally abused,cause he has got problem with his jealousy.his feelings were always more important than mine,all his treatment was just so hurtfull.he would be pissed off with me cause of text from someone i used to know,while he kept bringing me to their family restaurant,making me meet a girl he had sex with before me,but not just that,also a girl he had something with while we separated for a week.I didnt know about what happened between them that time,so i was sitting there like a fool,everyone knew,just i didnt.this is just a tiny part of what i went thru with him.i REALLY want to forgive him and give him another chance,but at the same time,i hate him for the pain he caused me.He doesnt even say sorry,and when he does...
2006-12-26 11:49:34 · 13 answers · asked by Eli 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i know he says it just because he wants to make me see he does regret.but i know,he doesnt.mine feelings were always less important to him,as long as he was fine,and that is whats pissin me off.that is not what love is about?so i want to forgive him,but he just did so much damage,that i feel like it is impossible?!so how do i do that?and everytime we talk on the phone and he is trying to make me feel bad about something small,he makes me remember something what was upseting me,and i hate him even more.how can i forgiv to someone who put me trhu so many bad things?does anybody know?
2006-12-26 11:53:10 · update #1
but also,what i dont get, why couldnt he see, how hurtfull his treatment was? like that thing with making me repeatedly meet a girl he had sex with.Did he really think it will be good feeling for me to sit there and watch him joking and talking with her.why are guys so stupid?
2006-12-26 11:58:05 · update #2
Even in the best of times, YOU must be 51% of your relationship. Your feelings, your best interests, your happiness, and your emotions... They must be slightly more important to you. If you don't think he's providing that fair share, then he's taking too much. A mistake is something that happens once. It's human, and can be forgiven. More than once; whether it's cheating, verbal abuse, a jealous outburst... no forgiveness.
Walk away.
2006-12-26 12:04:39 · answer #1 · answered by oracleone_2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every relationship is meant to be a lesson, not a final destination. Sounds like a guy with a character flaw. Probably from a family of psycho's. No way you can repair it. You must be pretty messed up too, to need a guy like that. Why else did you fall for him and not some boring nice guy? This relationship is feeding you guys just the right vitamin's you need. So just keep going at it. When your done you will know.
2006-12-26 12:50:26 · answer #2 · answered by me c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not stupid...... He found someone that loves him so much that he can do whatever he wants and still have someone steady when he wants you. You deserve so much better. He couldn't possibly love you if he does all these things to you. You need to get away NOW!!! It will seem like the end of the world at first but just hang in there and have some respect for yourself because there are actually guys out there that will treat you like a queen and make you feel like they love you just as much as you love them and won't rub past flings in your face to make you feel like a fool and to let their friends know how much control they have over you. You can do soooo much better.
2006-12-26 12:45:15 · answer #3 · answered by Summer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is patient, Love is kind.
It does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,
It is not easily angered,
it keeps no records of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts,
Always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails
1 Corinthians 13:4
but has to happen from both sides. Sounds like he has a lot of issues. Once you move on from him you will see all the reason why you won't date someone like that again, and I am talking from experience. Hind sight is a wonderful thing that you wish you had before the event, but you live and learn. I am now happily married to someone not like that.
2006-12-26 13:27:16 · answer #4 · answered by Billy Bob 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut your losses here honey. You deserve so much better than this selfish creature. Your morals are better than this. You have suffered enough. It will only get worse, for you. You don't need this baggage to carry around.
The good Lord made you with very good morals, and a heart of gold, so it sounds. Move on to someone who will truly love and appreciate you. We are asked, by God, to forgive others. That doesn't mean it makes everything alright. We are just to forgive, and let God handle the rest. HE knows your heart and how it's hurt you.
I pray the good Lord bring someone into your life soon, that will show you your worth. You deserve so much better. For your sanity, please just walk away, wiping your feet as you go girl.
Good luck.
2006-12-26 12:03:19 · answer #5 · answered by mickey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your pain. I understand that you think you love him but I truly believe if he was in love with you he'd treat you with the greatest respect.
I think you should see your minister, Doctor any one that can talk with you about your feelings.
You are a very important person who deserves to be treated ONLY with love and respect in whatever you do.
I wish you all the best Lucy
2006-12-26 12:08:50 · answer #6 · answered by lucyshines49 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look at all the pain he has caused you...do you really want to go back to that? ..it must of taken alot to be able to break up with this guy since you really loved him..but you are out of there now..do you really want to go back? ..i can understand that your love for him wants him back.
But you dont know if he will change or not..
You should forgive him..cause if you dont forgive him the pain that he caused you will be with you forever, but do not take him back.
2006-12-26 11:55:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st of all,i wanna know how long u been know this jerk? i've been in ur situation b4 but what i get is not only painful but frustrating & depression! i'm playing with mental games. What i can advice u is:U need to leave this guy immediately!!! normally our loved one is the 1 jeopardise ourself & didnt give their support & understanding to us. If u wanna find out whether he really love u or not u need to leave him & let him found out himself whether he really love u or not? It might be take 2 or 3 days or might be a weeks or months for himself to find out but all u need to do is only let him think himself & dont ever call or messaging him......let him feel that u really dont want to be with him anymore & let him the 1 find u....This might be hurts u a lot but u just need to be strong. i want u to prepare if u want to try my ways but it works for me!! If he find u then frm there u need to tell all the things that inside ur heart & mind.....u need to put terms & conditions if he wanna get back to u......u need to ready all the said u wanna told him b4 he find u otherwise what u have plan no meaning at all. From what u say i can feel the ego & selfishness inside him is too much.... why dont u try to tell him try to respect what u dislike or like....but guy normally are immature & casanova one....they trying to find the better one....but u need to ready for this:if he didnt comes for u,u need to moved on & look at out there....its a big big world,girl...there's a lots of nice guy waiting for u.....what ever had happen got reason...sure its happen for good...dont worry,try to cheer up urself & dont think too much about this jerk....i know girl are quickly melting when guy say something soft & touch our heart...but u just need to stand on ur own feet...try to stand where u are & fight for what u think its right & good 4u!!! And this is the time u pissed him off.......FIGHT FOR URSELF!!!
2006-12-26 12:36:24 · answer #8 · answered by v_iolet1978 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive him, but don't let him hurt you again. You are always supposed to forgive because you only hurt yourself when you don't. Don't ever let him hurt you like that again. NEVER let ANYONE treat you so ill. You don't deserve that sort of treatment. You're too good for that.
2006-12-26 12:33:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
been though it dump him if you give a second chance he'll do it again nothing will change no matter what he says it will get better then it will go back to the same old ways that's what it sounds like to me
2006-12-26 11:57:42 · answer #10 · answered by pisces_libra21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋