I have been with my husband 20yrs the last 3 not happy very sad I want out. Kids are grown but I'm afraid of him getting hurt and hurting our grownn children can't seem to find a easy way to do it. or how to do it. I am a registered nurse can take care of myself finacially i don't want his money i love hime but not in love i think i really would like to be in love i use to be in love with him can't get it back
2006-12-26 09:08:03 · 10 answers · asked by MAUREEN U 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The main objective of loving someone is to learn to fall in love with them over & over again. You need to recreate the sparks you once had. Unless he has committed adultery, has an addiction, or is abusive, you simply gave no good reasons for divorce.
2006-12-26 09:11:42 · answer #1 · answered by Daiquiri Dream 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are just bored? Does he treat you badly? It sounds like you are getting ready to make a decision that will be as hurtful to you in the long run as it will everyone else, IF you gave us all the information. If you leave for no reason other than you are just not happy, be prepared to start finding new friends. The friends the two of you have together will take his side if you just left him and hurt him for no apparent reason. Your kids will probably resent you too. You will literally be starting life from scratch, and that can be a very depressing thing. Think long and hard about this before you take the big step. By big step I mean the kind where if your legs aren't long enough you will fall off it instead and wind up with a gash in your forehead that will never heal.
2006-12-26 09:18:43 · answer #2 · answered by PDH 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your missing something in your relationship with your husband and only the two of you can figure out what that is. You didn't say if you have spoken with him about this problem? Maybe you need to very soon. Obviously the two of you got married happily and have stayed together happily. Try to work things out with him. People want the easy way out these days without even trying. Divorce is way too easy these days. If you can't work it out with your husband then I would definately consider a divorce should only be the last resort. Good luck
2006-12-26 09:14:43 · answer #3 · answered by Ms.Deb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't throw your marriage away without seeking a good counselor. Being in love not all it was cracked up to be and certainly doesn't last long. Find out why you loved him to begin with and get that back. Try to become friends and for sure try to communicate with him.
Talk to your pastor if you are a Christian. I believe you are looking for greener pastures and you could end up with a lot worse. There are nut cases out there. It really sounds like you have found someone else already.
2006-12-26 09:17:32 · answer #4 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you already are "in love" with somebody else.....Your worried how to end it without hurting everyone in the family & looking for an easy way out! There is no easy way...Start by talking to your husband & grown children....
2006-12-26 09:54:01 · answer #5 · answered by Sue M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can decide this one.If you go to church go and pray.Maybe try counseling if you can both go.I was on the other side of this situation not long ago still hurts but life will go on.Try to make it work divorce is a painfull messy affair.If its not to late remember why you fell in love in the first place.Good Luck
2006-12-26 10:03:21 · answer #6 · answered by P.Bunyun 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to express your feelings to him. Both of you need to see a counselor and try to resolve the problems in the relationship. If problems can't be resolved at least you children will know that you have tried to make it work.
I wish you luck that this process will be peaceful and even if heart will be broken both will cherish the 20 yrs and what you guys achieved together.
2006-12-26 09:15:05 · answer #7 · answered by ahsyam 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I was not in love with my ex anymore but still loved him. it was very hard i cried a lot. but you gotta do what makes you happy. no one wants to live life unhappy. life is too short for that. I have since met my soul mate and am very happy. i can see my self growing old with this man. never could before.
Good Luck!
2006-12-26 09:13:46 · answer #8 · answered by Orleanslady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried going to therapy with him? Does he know you are not happy? If yes to both of those questions - then leave LOVINGLY. There is NO REASON to be nasty or ugly about anything. Make this about you. Don't point fingers. Be nice. Leave - but be nice. It can be done.
2006-12-26 09:11:39 · answer #9 · answered by liddabet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just do whats best for you, you raised your kids and they are grown now, these years are all about you.
2006-12-26 09:10:06 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋