Cheating on Hubby?

Question

I admitted to my hubby that I had cheated on him once over a year and half ago, now what do I do. I don't know if I should drop it and never talk about it again or what? I know I am the one who screwed up but we are going to try to work things out and I want to make things as easy for him as possible. I love him dearly.

Stupidy.. thats why I cheated.

If I told him he could cheat he would be upset with me because I know he isn't that kind of man and would never hurt me like that. No matter if I did it to him, he would rather leave then cheat. I told him because I couldn't be married for the rest of my life knowing he didn't know the truth.

Mr. JW... I am the one supporting my family and I have since we've been married, I didn't use his resorces for anything. That doesn't excuse cheating but just don't assume anything.

Answer 1

everyone is entitled to a mistake...not so sure about this one tho...my wife cheated on me with (I know of) 6 men....The trust is gone, the love has faded, and I am faced with the knowledge that I dont have 100% of my woman anymore....You have to let him initiate any conversation....If he's like me, he is in constant pain with this knowledge.......Just dont do it again....good luck

Answer 2

So you are another one who cant be trusted or who can beleive the crap they tell themselves in order to do wrong huh? Just what the world needs. Well, thanks for being another shinining example to us.

You should think about that fact that you got a man who many women would kill to have, a good and faithful husband. You should consider what you have now put in his mind and how he will always have this idea, that women cant really be trusted and how women can tell themselves whatever they need to hear, in order to do what they want.

Tell us, are you one who was screwing someone else while telling your husband no? Where you willingly using his money, resources, etc while doing someone else?

I hope that BOTH of you do work things out. I also hope that you take a serious look at what you thought, did, told yourself and put someone else through. By the way, love isnt just a word. It is something you prove. You havent proved it, so dont say it.

Answer 3

I think when one spouse cheats there is something lacking in your marriage...Trust is a very hard to claim back once you have cheated. If your are in this marriage til death do you part, then put your husband first, show him you love him & want his trust back no matter how long it takes.....Communicate with him, if you know the reason you cheated I think it should be discussed so you both can work on that together.

Answer 4

At this point, you need to do whatever he asks you to do in order to restore the lost trust. It sounds like he wants to make a go of it and work on staying together. Let him take the lead. If he brings it up, be willing to talk about it, if he doesn't then don't force it on him. Let him know that you'll do whatever it is that he asks to help him through this and that you love him and you hope one day to be able to earn his trust again.

Answer 5

I don't want to judge you that why you cheat on your husband, you must be unhappy about some thing. But for your answer you should Never talk about it again. And If he wants to talk about it, just answer him in short version, like you forget every thing. And act normal so life will be normal too. If you really wants things right between you and your husband, try to forget every thing, i know it's hard. People do make mistake, just remember that.

Answer 6

Don't try to justify yourself to him because he will keep thinking you are fake. Just don't talk about it until he is ready. Until then, be all the wife you can be. Do and plan things that you know he will really like to show him that you are sorry. Don't keep saying you are sorry or he will never forgot. Try to be a family. Don't do the suggestion of "jail free" card..that will make things worse. And try to be patient with him.

Answer 7

Fair is fair...but two wrongs don't make a right. You should feel extremely fortunate that he didn't leave you. Why did you tell him now? You should definately never talk about it again. It will only make it harder for him. Now you just have to be the best wife in world for the rest of your marriage.

Answer 8

He may be upset with you...but it is for the better...my advice is to go see a marriage counseler. If you are engaged in a church, call the church to speak with the pastor, or look for a good marriage counselor. I would hope my wife would have the Courage it took you to share that. He may be mad now, but it is a good thing you told him. Sit down and talk about it and plead for his forgiveness.

Answer 9

That's a pretty ballsy move admitting it. If you got away with it for that long...why did you tell him? I'm not saying telling him was wrong. I don't think you should never talk about it again, but I don't think you should constantly remind him of your cheating. I think you should tell him once that you want to be able to talk about anything whenever he's ready. It'll probably take awhile for him to come to terms with what you did.

Answer 10

Let him take the lead, and if he never brings it up, you don't. But if he does, then be there for whatever he needs you to be or do. You might also consider tring to come up with something to show him you're sincere in wanting to make it up, something tangible. Saying it to him is great, but really, how is it different than your marriage vows?

Answer 11

Marriage counseling. when you cheat you need to get to the root of the problem and the person you cheated on needs to figure out for themselves why it happened and if they can really "work through it". You owe him at least this much.