So I'm back home for Winter break...I'm a senior in college that goes to school in the northeast, but I'm back in the conservative southeast (which is where I'm from)...and I realize more than ever for some reason that I really don't want to be here, maybe because I'm a minority. I feel like my relationship with my mother is really strained, I don't have any close friends, whenever we go out, I feel like people don't want us here, etc. I've grown up here all my life, but I never felt like I could fit in to the whole southern culture thing...it's so not diverse down here, and I feel like we always stick out like a sore thumb wherever we go. I have such low self-esteem...the city I live in is really boring...I'm always angry at my family....wishing I could be someone else so that I could fit in...so people wouldn't just assume I'm this or that bc of my ethnicity. I just feel so out of place and lonely. Anyone ever felt this way?
2006-12-26 07:16:44 · 8 answers · asked by toobland22 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
I live in a little bitty cowboy filled town in Texas, and I know that it is not the same situation, but I can partly understand what you mean. I think the solution is pretty simple though, you are about to graduate college, and when you do, find a job up north where your school is and stay where you are happy. I don't plan on stayingin this part of the country forever, even though this is where my family is. It is okay to move away to a place that makes you happy when you are an adult, and it is also very very common.
2006-12-26 07:29:47 · answer #1 · answered by averyanne77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't even go there! I'm so sick of people trashing the South and saying it's this festering bowl of racial hatred. No, no no. I don't think so. It's sounds to me like you have some family problems you need to address as well as some personal issues (as you admit). Moving from a small town in the Southeast to the big city in the Northeast won't help your family or self-esteem issues. BTW, I was born and raised in a small town in Tennessee and now live in the Northeast and have seen more racist pigs here than when I lived in the South. Anyway, I can relate to what your going through though (although I was just bored!). I'd come home for winter break and be bored out of my mind. When your used to hustle and bustle of college life, there is a definite adjustment to coming back home. Good luck and best wishes to you.
2006-12-26 08:01:41 · answer #2 · answered by [><] Rebel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU HAVE TO FIND YOU BEFORE ANYONE ELSE CAN FIND YOU. Is it all society and where you live? Low self-esteem is within you, not the city or state you live in, you have issues with your mom, why? Address and answer these questions what causes the strained relationship with your mother? Who's the blame for that? Is their always someone to blame or point the finger at in your situation? Senior year in college with a low self-esteem? I'm feeling, smartness, confidence, endurance, responsible, dependable and at the same time issues, what do you need to fit into? Out of place, then find a place within yourself, do some deep soul searching and realize that you are who you are and that's what make you unique as an individual, step out of that shell of loneliness and find happiness inside yourself from your own goals, experiences, and accomplishments, have confidence in you, you have to find you before anyone else can find you, what makes you happy? What do you like to do? You don't need the world behind you to feel happy and fulfilled, when you were born you didn't come out holding no ones hand, you came out alone, and when you die you want have a buddy sharing your coffin, my point is it's all about you and how you choose to live your life, what can you do? Start living each and every day as if it were your last, so you don't have time to try to belong, or try to fit in, cause remember its your last, so be you rather you're a ton of joy, or boring as hell, it doesn't matter its who you are, and make mends with your mother what ever the cost, something could happen to her or you and you never get the chance, life is to precious if you didn't belong you wouldn't be...............Peace and LOL...Lots of Love....
2006-12-26 08:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by yahoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't take it out on your family. While all these people are fake to you, your family will always be there. I'm white. I live in a black neighborhood, went to black schools, and have black friends. I never ever wish I was black just fit in where I live. I'm happy with who I am and who I live around. I have a black boyfriend, I talk white, and I also get the dirty looks from people (white and black). I also don't care what people think. No one is ever gonna be happy with your decisions in life and you will probably kill yourself trying to please everyone. Just live your life the way you want to. Be happy. Don't spend your life being mad at the world because they don't like what you do. Hope this helps you :)
2006-12-26 07:36:10 · answer #4 · answered by #1 due 06/17/10 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not the only one, the reason is they have a different standpoint of different or common situations. But don't feel bad that's what distincts you from other people.
2006-12-26 07:50:03 · answer #5 · answered by dark&pure? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every day. It's called being an individual.
2006-12-26 07:20:13 · answer #6 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are quite simply allowing ignorant people to validate You.Stand
proud of who You are.It is not where we live, it is how we live.
2006-12-26 07:24:47 · answer #7 · answered by gwhiz1052 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is someone who can take the lonliness away from you. He did it for me many years ago. His name is Jesus Christ and He is only a prayer away.
http://www.handlethetruth.net
2006-12-26 07:21:54 · answer #8 · answered by truthhandl3r 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋