I recently entered a relationship with a Stud/Dyke a few months ago. When we first started having sex I performed oral sex on her twice, and she liked it. But, now all of a sudden she wants me not to do it anymore. She says that she will not let me turn her into a "*****" and if I put my head or hands anywhere NEAR her vagina she pitches a fit. The only time she wants my head down there is when I'm performing oral sex on her strap, or using my hands on it. How do I talk to her and get her to open her mind a little more when it comes to our sex life. I would love to do the same things to her that she does to me. What could've possibly caused her to switch her mind so quickly when she loved it so?
2006-12-26 06:30:13 · 6 answers · asked by CartoonFreak1985 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
She probably doesn't like the idea of being the submissive or receiving one in the relationship. She could be used to her role and doesn't like anything that makes her question it. If this change is sudden there might be an outside cause. It's amazing how many people will overcompensate when they start comparing themselves with others. Seems kind of immature but she might have shared it with a someone and got mocked or overheard someone talking about roles and felt insecure, but that's just purely speculation on my part.
She needs to be sympathetic towards your sexual needs, and yes reciprocation is a need for many people. Let her know that you don't always like to be on the receiving end of everything and that you'd occasionally like to switch roles. If she can't do that then you may need some relationship counseling.
2006-12-27 01:54:16 · answer #1 · answered by Rageling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can honestly say its probably a masculine thing.. I sometimes have an issue with that myself. She may not be comfortable with her own vagina. She might feel more comfortable playin the male role and you givin oral to her vagina makes her less of a man. A lot of times women who are concidering gender reassignment surgery have a really hard time finding pleasure when it comes to their own vaginal contact.
You should ask her about it. Dont attack her though just ask.. If she is comfortable with it she will open up. Dont make her feel pressured to tell her just say that you wanted to know and just want to be able to make her feel as good has she makes you feel (if thats true of course)
2006-12-26 15:25:55 · answer #2 · answered by lostboi3008 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first guess is that you weren't pleasing her in some way; whether it's your tongue action--not enough or perhaps too much; or she didn't orgasm the way she wants to. Let's explore this cause i was through teh same thing with my chick.
Obviously it's something that you did-- or did NOT do. Could you have been lacking in intensity? Did you get to her clit and work on that? Did you unplease her somehow by overdoing it? (which is possible)? Did you watch and listen for signs of what SHE wants satisfied orally, and where she wants it?
basically i've found that girls tell you things in their own language and you need to understand and pick up the clues and the cues.
failing to do that can produce a negativity in a certain area, and in this case, she doesnt want you really going down on her. forget that she wants it around her strap, thats not going down on a chick.
what can you do? well, you turned her off so now its up to you to turn her on again. my advice is to tell her how much you want to do it and please her, and ask why the sudden change. unless you can figure out whats gone wrong or where you made your mistake(s) and can try to correct it subtly. i found out what i did wrong myself-- she wanted me eating her out and using my finger in her a---hole. how in the world would i guess that? so she told me to stop going down on her. and i did, but i listened and listened and tried this and that till i hit it. and boy did she love it, all the way to orgasm city!!
you'd be surprised how easy it is to make someone happy again and get what you want--to have your mouth in between her cheeks-- if you just play the game the right way. LISTEN and LISTEN to your partner!
good luck and let me know how it goes, it'll all work out for you im sure if you just make her happy and listen to her needs, wants and dislikes.
2006-12-26 14:55:47 · answer #3 · answered by mr p 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Some butches are like that. Some do not want any contact other than with devices. She might of tried it at first to see if she could do it. I just say talk to her to about (out of bed) and see what she says. I am sure she appreciates your efforts and all but some just don't like it.
2006-12-26 14:51:27 · answer #4 · answered by aimeramy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has serious submissive issues and does not want to release any of her control. You are her pet and that is where she wants you to stay.
2006-12-26 15:04:15 · answer #5 · answered by Krys Tamar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a very vulnerable position to be in. I don't like my boyfriend doing that to me. But I have no problem doing that to him.
2006-12-26 15:01:32 · answer #6 · answered by Mimi 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋