She has been trustworthy up until this point. I have a keylogger on my computer and it was like reading hard core porn. She knows I have a keylogger, I suppose she got lost in the moment and forgot it was on.
So, do I go to her, her mom? I am so disappointed because she always talks about purity and stuff, but the log talks about them having oral sex all the time...
distraught.
2006-12-26 06:13:00 · 38 answers · asked by Kit K 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Just because this child is a teenager and going through puberty has absolutely no relevance. Bringing her sex life into your house makes it your problem. This is an issue of trust and responsibility. She has broken your trust and proved to be a very irresponsible person. If she is typing hard core porn on your computer and knows you have a key logger, what else is she doing in your home? She could be acting out these words, or even have your children involved. This is a serious issue.
Call the cops and make a report- you are obliged to as this involved sex and children!! (always a scary combination) Then call the girls parents and inform them of the issue. You do not need to talk to the babysitter, she showed she has no clue of responsibility, so talking to her will do nothing. She chose to have sex in your house where your children are, and she wants you to know it. Make sure other parents know it so they don't have the same issue.
2006-12-26 08:59:13 · answer #1 · answered by Illiara 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tough situation. Can you tell what time she was typing this? Were the children in bed? How old are your kids? Can they read? If they are old enough to talk, is she on the computer a lot? Do they like her babysitting?
It depends on how old she is too. If she is an older teen and the children were in bed I wouldn't worry too much about it. A lot of us had some action packed teen years. :)
I can completely understand your concern. I would password protect my computer and let her know that it is off limits from now on. I wouldn't necessarily say why because it would be awkward. I would also just go over your expectations in her as a sitter - no visitors, no phone calls, interacting with the children, and no computer use. Let her know what she is able to do once the children are in bed - television, light clean up, etc.
I wouldn't talk to her mother either unless she was very young, the person she was talking to was not a minor, was a stranger, or something else just unacceptable. It would make the whole thing uncomfortable.
If you cannot get past this, then be honest with her (not her mom) and tell her what you found and that you think you would feel more comfortable finding a new sitter.
Tough situation. Take Care. SD
2006-12-26 06:20:52 · answer #2 · answered by SD 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well I think you need to talk to her and not her mom. I think that her personal life is none of your business and you need to make that clear to her but you need to tell her that it is not acceptable in your home and if she does it again then she is fired. I would not fire her because I am sorry but I have oral sex and I do not judge anyone but there is a time to look at porn and a time not to just get it clear with her!! ( PS I am married so I have an excuse to just like you might)
2006-12-26 07:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by mommy of 2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course your distraught! How long until this so called boy friend begins coming over for a live demo? OR has that already taken place, and his friends and their friends..
Cushy situation she has,and she violated your trust like crazy too.
At least let the cops know what is going on, and spare another family the grief you are experiencing. Your only mentioning what your key logger caught...I guarantee there is much more going on and guess what? you and your child are paying for it. Get past your guilt at misjudging this canny kid and call the cops.. now!
2006-12-26 06:32:23 · answer #4 · answered by Zair 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't see what the big deal is as long as she still takes care of the kids. It's not like she's actually having sex with the guy on your couch....ps if she does do that its definitely time to get a new babysitter.
2006-12-26 06:24:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you really trust her with your kid,I would talk to her and tell her you don't want her to use the computer while being in charge of your kids and give her another chance.I wouldn't tell her mom about it.Everyone talks to their boyfriend or husband in ways they don't act around everyone else.It doesn't make her a bad person as long as she doesnt talk like that around your kids.
2006-12-26 06:16:38 · answer #6 · answered by J♥R♥R 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her.
If it is unsatisfactory, don't use her again.
Remember that when you get involved in any chat/game, you tend to lose track of what you were doing, and may ignore anything else happening.
It really doesn't matter if it is porn or a video game.
2006-12-26 06:21:07 · answer #7 · answered by Don't look too close! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do that with boys all the time when I babysit, but usually just chat and watch YouTube or download tunes.
It's no big deal and stop spying on her. I am 15.
2006-12-26 10:35:09 · answer #8 · answered by Lori 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her do it, it's natural, she's going through pubrity. But, make sure you tell her that you know and that you won't tell her mother; but also tell her that you better make sure that you children are safe and that she is multitasking with the two of her tasks. Sometimes, come home early when she would least expect it so you can catch her in the wrong, THEN tell her mom! and then you can fire her sorry ***!
2006-12-26 06:28:43 · answer #9 · answered by Insomnia 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
yes, she is still achild I take it... a teen IS a child. Tell her parents and tell them why she can no longer care for your kids. Fire her.
Its the best thing.. I would not want that trash watching my kids, or NOT watching them. If she is doing that she is NOT watching them. Its a breach of trust and she needs to learn her lesson. Further, you could be helping prevent teen pregnancy also.
Call her parents. If she were my daughter I would want you to tell me immediately.
2006-12-26 06:23:02 · answer #10 · answered by SunValleyLife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋