feeback on 3 poems please?

Question

Breaking Thoughts

Transition,
to no hours for sleep
you cannot begin to
believe in me,
beckoning the broken
to make a home
of make-belief.

Position
myself in between
the lock and the key,
opening to
a different part of me.
Will you hold me
when I let myself go?

Condition
the heart to find in itself
the silence that it needs
to preserve
a hope for higher knowledge,
than Jesus on my floor
can communicate.


Human Creation

Making snowflakes,
hands so tender
to create
what only a goddess can.
She molds and consoles
and longs for circles.
She hopes somewhere
our beings are made
out of something
stronger than clay.
Hierarchies hinder creativity
until creation
is nothing,
no art like that
of her body.
A lesson forgotten
in its simplicity
cannot slip to symbolism
of her identity.

Paths to Pride

Purple teacup
full of heritage
reborn on modern streets.
Walls of heros
she wishes could save her now,

as the oppressed wait
for the juncture
of greatness and time.
Other parts of her soul
find the dignity.
Her latest heart harmonizes,
shared knowledge bonds
beyond words
and creates a new world.

Answer 1

i like but they are very deep in thought and would take more time to read and understand

Answer 2

You know what? I think the best place for you to go would be to sign up on http://writing.com/authors/princess_jaoli ! Once you click on that link, click Get Started and sign up. It's free and you'll meet some great members that will review and take time with your work. I think you have lots of beautiful words there, but no rhyming stanza pattern, which a real poem would have. (Like 8.6.8.6) Keep up the good work, though...and give Writing.com a try, you'll like it!

Answer 3

I like them but I suspect that - I write poetry now and then also - if you put them aside for a bit and go back to them you will flesh them our a bit amd make them even better!!