My husband and I been married for 9 years, we have 3 kids, and one of the kids is ours together. I am now 8 weeks pregnant and he wants me to have a abortion because we don't have a house. We have been approved and have 100% financing for a house, we just haven't found one yet. What should i do? I have tried everything to convince him that i don't want a abortion and told him that since i am in this new positon at work i have more maternity resources.
2006-12-26 04:16:21 · 14 answers · asked by teri20020 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
The bottom line is that YOU are the one that is pregnant and NO ONE can force you to have an abortion. You know in your heart that you do not want to end this pregnancy. Look at your other children and try to imagine your life without one of them. You were already a mother to three children and now you are a mother to four. The fourth one is very vulnerable and needs you now more than the other three do. You literally hold this baby's life in your hands. How can you even consider destroying the little life that you and your husband created? You were not raped by some stranger. You are not a frightened 15 year old girl. Your life is not in danger if you continue this pregnancy. Would you really consider ending the life of your child just because your husband does not think it is a good idea? My husband had a fit when I was pregnant with my 4th child. He was horrible and abusive to me while I was pregnant. I never for one minute, EVER considered ending my childs life. The son that I had is my husbands favorite child, he absolutely adores that child. The child that I speak of is 19 years old now and a college sophmore. He is a gifted child that wants to be a minister, he has a gift for helping people and I constantly hear what an unusual, loving child he is. The thought that I might never have known him, had I listened to my husband, scares me to death.
We are women. We have been given the immense responsibility and honor or being able to bring forth life. That gift was never bestowed on men, and for a reason. They do not have the necessary compassion and unconditional love that women are capable of. Be true to yourself. Exercise your God given right to bring forth another life. Do not let a man convince you to throw away your greatest treasure.
I hate to sound crass but men are a dime a dozen. You could have lots of husbands but your children are yours forever. They are part of you. Your blood runs in their veins. They grow inside of you. You must not turn your back on this little one any more than you would turn your back on any of the others.
Please don't end this little ones lilfe. You are this baby's mother just as much as the ones that are here now.
Find it in your heart to love this baby as you love them.
Blessings
Lady Trinity~
2006-12-26 05:27:03 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Trinity 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice? Stay strong and don't let anyone hurt you or your baby. This is your children's little brother or sister. You'd never let anyone hurt one of your born children, right? Your unborn baby is just as much your child and even more in need of your love and protection. He or she is totally defenseless and is depending on you for safety.
Your baby's heart has been beating since she was three weeks old. At eight weeks, she already has tiny fingers and recordable brain waves. Here are some photos of what she looks like right now:
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm
as well as some photos and video of babies who were aborted at 7 and 8 weeks:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html
There is evidence that babies may be able to feel pain at 8 weeks:
http://www.advocatesfortheinnocent.com/fetalpain.html
Abortion is very dangerous for you as well:
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm
Not having a house is NOT a good reason for killing a child. If you aborted your child and found a house soon afterward, how would you live there, knowing that there should be another beautiful child running through the house giggling and giving you hugs? You have plenty of time to find a house, but even if you don't, you will manage. That is what families do.
You don't have to convince him of anything. Just tell him that you are not aborting your child. Period. You can only control your own behavior, not his. He is being selfish and uncaring towards both you and your baby, and there may not be anything you can do about that. It is up to him to step up and be a man. If you give him some time, maybe he will. If he doesn't, at least you will know what kind of a person he really is.
If you need help, please go to a pregnancy care center in your area. They can give you referrals for financial, medical, legal, and housing assistance; free ultrasounds (at many centers); free maternity and baby supplies; and counseling and emotional support. You can find one by calling 1-800-395-HELP or visitingL
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp
Also, this organization specializes in helping career women who are pregnant:
http://www.nurturingnetwork.org
You can do the right thing. You will never regret it.
2006-12-26 06:47:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear this. Sounds like ya'll already have a house full but I would go through with the pregnancy anyway. Maybe everything will work out & you get a house. You guys just need to start being more careful & get your tubes tied so that this doesn't happen again! Just go ahead & have the baby no matter what he says, he'll come around I'm sure!
Good luck!
2006-12-26 04:31:42 · answer #3 · answered by beachbum26 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
clarify to him, you do not make judgements with out him, you're exploring your concepts. tell him why you're uncomfortable with abortion, and tell him why you want to come across adoption. in case you at the on the spot are not confident, or unable to vocalize it, try journaling, it may help you note what you want to say to him. If he would not aid you communicate once you try to describe your causes, try writing it right down to enable him understand. locate out why he's so adamant on his selection. do not enable him pressure you right into a decision basically to ward off a strive against. keep on with your guns, until eventually you both are waiting to come back to a decision you're comfortable with. If actual one of you do not accept as true with the superb selection interior the right, that's going to likely be a bitter strive against down the line which will bring about resentment both on your section or his. I choose you success, and that i'm hoping that your marriage can very last this extremely difficult selection. good success with even if selection you're making. i'm hoping that's the superb for all 3 of you.
2016-12-01 04:42:11 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Truthfully, i wouldnt have an abortion. I think that if he is worried about finance's or just doesn't want it putting the baby up for adoption is a better idea. There are so many people who want to adopt, there is no reason u should have an abotion. If he just doesnt want it, do what u want to do. u are the one carrying the baby not him. so i think u should either keep it or put it up for adoption. Do what u want to do......he will be alright try to convince him a little more....
2006-12-26 04:32:58 · answer #5 · answered by sassybonitaprincess 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My advise to you is to go with your heart. I know this is probally a very hard decision for you to make seeing that your mate is set on an abortion. If you want this child it is your decision to make not his. After all it is your body. From the sound of it you have thought things out. If you feel that having this child is what ou need to do then do it. I always say God never gives us more than we can handle. God bless and good luck !!
2006-12-26 04:31:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get an abortion go through with it.You'll have alot of time before your baby is born to get a house don't do that cause you'll regret it later.Babies are God's gift to us and you have to Cherish it.Don't go though with an abortion. Good Luck and God Bless
2006-12-26 04:42:03 · answer #7 · answered by Cutie 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You have plenty of time to get a house before the baby would be born. But since you are married this is very tricky. You two NEED to agree on this or it can break up your marriage. I would defintitely talk to him about it some more.
2006-12-26 04:29:39 · answer #8 · answered by Wiccan~Momma 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
my husband and i have a 6 month old baby, when i goy pregnant we lived in a car, struggled with finding housing, and had a lot of problems, our baby is healthy, you need to do what you feel is right for you, even if it requires big arguements,and splitting up
2006-12-26 04:34:19 · answer #9 · answered by meth 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
i dont think you should get an abortion, keep the baby
2006-12-26 04:55:21 · answer #10 · answered by jackie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋