I'm a senior in high school and for most of my time in school I've wanted to be friends with this one group in particular but I always felt held back. Mianly because I felt obligated to be friends with people who kind of attached to me and wouldn't really have any friends if it weren't for me. But anyway they all seem to have moved away or lost interest in me so at the end of last year I decided that the next year I would not worry about it so much, that I would try not to feel guilty because I had been held back for so many years and figured its senior year I should try to enjoy it as much as I can and make up for lost time. But anyway, I'm so shy that even though they seemed to be very friendly and seemed to give me an opening to be friends with them, I couldn't do it and nothing ever came of it. I tried getting a myspace to talk with them over the internet to show that I wanted to open up a little and stay in touch but i couldn't take the stress and got rid of it, I think upsetting them a little in the process, they were happy I got one. I recently got it back, but the stress is just killing me again and I think I'm getting rid of it again soon. Anyway, the last few months nothing really happened with this group A, but then another girl i like from group B worked on a project with me and one day asked me to sit at lunch with them for one day. I did for the one day but didn't want to look like I had chosen one group over the other because group A has been equally inviting over the years, so I just stopped going to lunch. This has complicated things so much and I just feel trapped. It's made my depression a lot worse, and lately, where I used to try to mingle in groups, I just sit by myself and don't talk, and I'm probably ruining my chances of having friends, but it's gotten to the point where I can't honestly say I care if I'm friends with them sometimes, but other times it just kills me, like when I see pictures of them together and think of what I could've had it makes me so depressed. THIS IS WHAT I THINK I"M GOING TO DO. I'm just getting ready to give up on the whole thing, since I only have a few months to go. Do you think I should do that?
2006-12-26 03:51:23 · 11 answers · asked by leena 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
And just keep to myself and stay alone
2006-12-26 03:52:37 · update #1
WOW, I must say I feel sorry for you, You have alot of emotional problems. This letter you wrote sounds crazy. (not be be mean) but someone needs to be honest with you.YOU are your own worst enemy. Why do you fight yourself and go back and forth on your thoughts so much? I'm sure you would be alot happier if you stopped doing that and know that you have something to offer people in a friendship, It sounds like you are punishing yourself. But if you don't stop this irratic way of thinking you are going to scare everyone away. STOP
2006-12-26 04:01:00 · answer #1 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know your are an intelligent person as it isn't often a 12 year old is a Senior in H.S., so I'll just lay it all out here for your straight like . . .
Take a good long look at yourself in the mirror, sounds like you didn't really value the friends you had before and now they're gone and you are feeling lonely. >> GOOD.
You seem like you are trying way too hard. >> BAD.
If you think you'll be happy if you get in with certain group that your life will suddenly get better, you are living in a fantasy world! >> WORSE.
If you find 'myspace' so "stressful" - then by all means DO NOT DO IT! For that matter, don't do ANYTHING that you don't really want to do just to be accepted or you might end up prego or on drugs or much worse . . .
Watch the DVD of Heathers and remember it not always easy growing up.
2006-12-26 12:13:11 · answer #2 · answered by taowhore 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need to choose! I suppose you could drift between group A and group B if you want to, but that might not go down too well with one of the groups - so it's probably best that you just choose a group and stay with them.
You could probably make some more friends in your class and go to an entirely new group altogether, but if you want to make friends you want to be able to get along with the group - something usually links groups together. Whether it be the same class, they live near each other or a specific interest... Of course there are exceptions but *usually* this is the case.
Chin up! Being depressed won't get you anywhere. Keep trying. ;)
Good luck
MaybeLater_x
2006-12-26 11:56:25 · answer #3 · answered by Deconstitutionalization 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're causing yourself more stress than you need to. Sounds like you didn't use to choose your friends but now you want to. There is no reason you can't be friends with both. Sit with group B and if group A asks tell them you made friends with some of the people from group B. Nobody owns you...you own yourself. You can still keep both groups of friends. Live it up your last year, honestly you may never see either group again once you graduate, and in the real world, you choose your friends.
Good Luck!
2006-12-26 12:00:56 · answer #4 · answered by mirmade13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry, It really doesnt matter, group A , group B, they all are humans and no better than the other.
Just be friends with group A and B and forget what any of them think, they have no impact on your future or decisions.
Just dont give up, be friends with all of em.
Pretend u have known them all your life and just sit down and act like u talkin to your sister, brother, moma, just relax and go wid the flow.
U will laugh about this one day and think how silly.
2006-12-26 11:58:47 · answer #5 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
High school is full of "groups" or "clicks". There is always a popular group, always an artistic group, and always the outcast group. The best thing you can remember is that the walls separating these groups disappear the instant high school is over. I can't believe some of the people I have befriended from my high school.
My advice is to stop trying to fit into other peoples groups, and start befriending people who fit into your group. That is make friends because they interest you.
Jeremy
2006-12-26 12:02:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's wrong with being friends with both groups? Clicks are so out these days in school. It's actually cool to be friends with everyone. I used to be friends with everyone in school. The nerds, the jocks, the slow...etc. There was this one guy in my class that every Valentines Day we would send flowers to people and he never had any. I was the only one to send him one...he was one of the "dorks"...but he and I were friends in class and he was siked that he got a flower from me. Pretty soon, other people became friends with him as well and it boosted his ego a little bit more. Everyone should get along with everyone. Nothing wrong with being friends with two different groups. It actually shows that you are a better person.
2006-12-26 12:01:27 · answer #7 · answered by Michele K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well your just nerves but just go and ask if you could sit with them and they will say yes thats for GROUP A.and if another day sit with the girl from group B and dont worry about looking like you dissed the other group you just tell them you were asked to sit with them and you did.and if they dont understand then they were never really good friends in the first place.And then just start sitting with the other group like groupB
2006-12-26 12:18:11 · answer #8 · answered by Claire M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh dear...don't count time it makes things worse ... you consider their feelings over your, just be your self..be with the one that you like to be with.... do what pleases you... it's your time your life... yes you have to care for them and their feelings but that much...live the day as much as you can... enjoy your time.. that what you have to care about
Good Luck and Merry Christmas
2006-12-26 12:25:22 · answer #9 · answered by Princess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be friends with them all if one don't like you for having someone as a friend! trustme when i say there friendship isn't worth it!
2006-12-26 11:57:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋