Can you write an amusing paragraph or 2 or more about you and your friends at an "After Christmas Sale" ....

Question

that includes these phrases?
1. Let's meet at the Food Court in an hour.
2. OH MY GOSH !! That's James Arness autographing his new CD.
3. I have to call Sunshine....she loves him so much!
4. Some of those women in that store were so vicious. I'm SURE they MUST have done some time in prison.
5. Trying to find our car in the parking garage so very much like an old "Seinfeld" show.
6. All I want is to get home,have a cup of tea and sit in front of a cozy fire.

Hello, teacher. I am 57 years old. You MUST be confusing me with that other cute girl in your class! : )

Silly me, I meant to say that James Arness♥ is signing his new DVD.

Answer 1

We descended on the mall like Generals surveying the field of battle. Already the stores were packed with people scurrying here and there taking advantage of the fantastic price cuts the day after Christmas always brought. "All right," I said calmly, quickly contemplating the best method of attack. "Let's split up. We'll cover more ground that way. I'll take the third floor. Amy, you take second, and Liz, you can take this one. Rendezvous north side, 1600 hours!" Amy laughed. "Yes, General Gwen. Except, let's meet at the Food Court in an hour. I'd kill for a raspberry smoothie." "Very well," I agreed. "Onward, girls! To battle!" We scurried off, each with our own section to conquer. I stepped off the escalator with purpose in my stride. Twenty shops and only an hour to use. I had to manage my time to perfection. Walking deliberately past a packed store, despite the great bargains (I decided to return to that one later), I tried to find somewhere where I could make a bit of headway. Suddenly my eyes opened wide. There, a sign telling all mall patrons about a signing session soon to go on! Oh my gosh!! That's James Arness autographing his new CD! I thought happily to myself. That sold it. I had to go there. But to get there, I had to pass through a... oh no. Not that. Anything but that. There's no way I'll survive the trip! But I must. Onward, brave soul. Through the shoe store to the goal beyond! Expensive shoes labelled at 80 percent off draw more crowds than free merchandise (though admittedly not much.) Desperately I tried to worm my way through. All around me, people fought tooth and nail to grab the perfect pair of footwear. Some of those women in that store were so vicious. I'm sure they must have done some time in prison. Finally, finally I made my way through to the other section of the mall. I started on my way to James Arness, but suddenly I stopped in my tracks. I gasped, "I have to call Sunshine... she loves him so much! She has to know about this!" I was torn. What should I do? Go get the autographed CD, or call Sunshine and have Amy and Liz mad at me - because there was no way I could get back to the food court in an hour. I nodded and steeled my resolve. Signing sessions happen only every now and then. It was easy to tell what was more important. I found a payphone, and though I had to wait 20 minutes behind a line until I finally could use it, I called. Quickly I filled Sunshine in on the details. Through her excitement she fairly shrieked into the phone. "I will be right there! Go get in line! If you reach him before I get there, get me a signed CD and tell him I love him!" We hung up and I hurried to get in the already lengthy line. Sunshine arrived in no more than twenty minutes. She must have broken the speed limit to get here, but she refused to admit it. We spent another fifteen minutes just gazing at him adoringly until we reached the front of the line and he gallantly signed our things. Sunshine was in heaven. Sure enough, when all was said and done, I'd only done a bit of shopping and I was ten minutes late to meet Amy and Liz, but they forgave me because Sunshine was there - she brightens up any day. After a brief stop at the food court, we were gone again, Sunshine adding to our little company. The mall lay in ruins - complete and utter defeat under the attack of our group. Having thoroughly conquered our rival the mall, we headed out onto another field of battle - the parking garage. This time, Sunshine was on her own; she'd brought her own car. She was fine with that. As she told us, "All I want is to get home, have a cup of tea, and sit in front of a cozy fire." We parted ways, and Sunshine hurried home to enjoy her new CD. As for the three of us, trying to find our car in the parking garage, so very much like an old "Seinfeld" show, was almost impossible as others tried to leave and more tried to come in. It was another half an hour until we were finally out on the open road. We, the valiant conquerors, celebrated our victory by playing the radio at full blast, trumpeting our way back home. The best thing is, I've got some of my Christmas shopping for next year done, and I won't have to fight another battle when the season returns.

Answer 2

'O.K. Mom' I said to my wife 'let's meet at the Food Court in an hour'. 'Why' she asked 'where are you off to?'. 'One thing is certain' I answered with a broad smile 'there is no way I am going into a ladies store and wait while you buy a couple of new bras'. As I turned away, she pointed to a nearby record store 'Oh my gosh!! That's James Arness autographing his new CD'. 'Who the hell is he' I asked in all honesty 'not one of them gangsta rappers, is he?'. 'No' she answered indignantly 'I have to call Sunshine...she loves him so much'.
'Why don't you get him to autograph your new bra - if he is any good Miranda would not believe it when you tell her and show her his autograph'. I doubt if she even heard my reply as I walked away. 'Now, where's the golf shop' I asked myself. I stopped and looked into the record store and could hardly believe my eyes. There was pushing and shoving, hair pulling and clothes jerking, not to mention the stealing. I saw at least fifty or sixty CD's being slipped into false pockets on womens' coats. I have to admit it, and I must insist that I am not a masogonist, that some of those women in that store were so vicious. I'm sure they must have done some time in prison.
Still, I had better things to do. Right, the golf shop. 'Oh crap' I said aloud, then to myself 'You would forget your head Robbo, if it was not connected to your body by your neck. You forgot your pipe and tobacco again - come on then, back to the car'.
Two minutes later I was in the parking area but once again dementia kicked in. I did not have a clue where I had left it. A long walk around each floor, up and down in the lift and I could still not find it. I can tell you that trying to find our car in the parking garage (was) so very much like an old 'Seinfeld' show that both were equally unfunny.
Having found the car, lit my pipe and made myself comfortable, I decided to hell with the Golf shop. If I can't play with the clubs I have why should I think that spending a couple of hundred pounds on new ones would make any difference. All I want is to get home, have a cup of tea and sit in front of a cozy fire.
You know something, I really wish that someone would make a DVD with all the endings of those old films they show during the day on BBC. I doubt if I have ever seen the end of a single one.........
Knock, knock on the window. 'Alright mom' I sleepily said to my wife as I awoke from a deep sleep. 'Where have you been for the last two hours. I sat like a fool in the Food Court waiting for you' I could sense that she was annoyed with me. But that's life, if she does not understand me after forty years, she never will, God bless her....

Answer 3

omit Kitty had closed up the long branch Saloon for the evening. She purposefully stood below the chandelier which replaced into decked with mistletoe. With arms on her hips, she appeared on the tall united states of america Marshall, "Matt Dillon ... i'm going to love you 'til the day I die'. Matt appeared at her tenderly and replied, "i'm going to lasso you the moon, Kitty. ( Scene cuts). exterior the long branch, the city under the impression of alcohol, Louie must be heard, "Merry Christmas avert domicile! Merry Christmas, horse stables! Merry Christmas, Feed and Grain! Merry Christmas, you incredible previous long branch!! With this he waved his liquor bottle and swayed". Festus, the Deputy Sheriff, walked as much as Louie giving him a nudge, "enable's mosey on all the way down to the jailhouse. That grotesque green alien critter could double decrease back. do no longer you spot ....you KNOTHEAD?! It ain't narry risk-free to be out in avert come sunset".Louie slightly stirred. An inspired Festus scowled, one eye open and one eye a million/2-close, " That varmit's buggy come nar settin' the hol' dad blame city on hearth. do no longer you spot... KNOTHEAD?! "And the solar's rays will shoot out of your arms and your ft and the ends of your hair ... am I speaking too lots"? Festus grew to become to work out record. "You mangey ol' Scudderbug. i'm fixin' on bringin' Louie in". Festus scorned. Festus and record stirred the city under the impression of alcohol to his ft. As they staggered down the dusty street Louie waved his liquor bottle putting forward, "Hee Haw and Merry Christmas".

Answer 4

This is your high school teacher who gave you that assignment. DO IT YOURSELF OR ELSE I"LL MAKE YOU WRITE IT 10 TIMES.


:-)