Recently divorced, still very much in love with the ex. Still do anything for him. friends tell me i am crazy he is just using me for sex and to bail him out of the mess he got himself into. Maybe i am crazy. I just want to give up....
I dont think I can take the pain anymore....I am so lost without him... am I crazy?
2006-12-25 14:58:50 · 20 answers · asked by uask4it1_99 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are by no means crazy. Christmas can be a depressing time for many people. I truly understand what you are going through. It is the hardest thing to be in love with a person who is just not good enough for us. I have been there, trust me. The pain will go away, in time. But, you need to keep your distance for your ex. Every time that you are with that person you are opening yourself up to be hurt again and again. You are not letting yourself heal this way. Give yourself some space. Find a support group to go to, if need be. Open up to loved ones, friends and family. Christmas will soon be over, and with the new year approaching you are in a great opportunity to change your self, to heal yourself. You can do it. Life does go on. And you will find someone who will love you just as much as you love them. Just be patient and endure. Best wishes to you.
2006-12-25 15:34:39 · answer #1 · answered by Jeanne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not crazy. divorce is a very stressful thing to go through in life and even more so when you have been together for a long time or have had children together. The holidays always bring people down, esp those that are alone.
Keep your head up and stop letting him get the booty calls. If it is over then you both need to move on and let well enough alone.
2006-12-26 00:12:54 · answer #2 · answered by Eastcoast beachgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you're divorced from the man, it would probably help you to realize that it's finally over if you stopped being in contact with him entirely. It's difficult and takes some self-discipline but just make a pact with yourself of "NO CONTACT". Don't call him, don't visit, don't help him out with his problems, and definitely don't have sex with him anymore. Don't let him use you like that. Just realize it's over and let him go...
Keep yourself occupied, go out with your friends, and with time the pain will go away. You'll have a new outlook on life with a new self-respect. You will find someone new who is right for you but you have to end this relationship first before any new blessings can come into your life. Best of luck!
2006-12-25 23:17:34 · answer #3 · answered by Jenny A_331 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are crazy, just allowing your heart to get in the way, its funny cause people have a way of telling others to get over it and move on, but a person will only do that when they are ready to. You know what I am talking about, a person can have someone that treats them really bad, but they will only leave when they are tired. Once you get tired of being used, if thats the case you will move on.............and to answer the question about hurting on Christmas, yes, I am hurting as well, my boyfriend is in Iraq and I miss him so much, he called earlier and I missed the phone call and now I am so down, and thats why I am online, hopeing to help someone else feel better, will hopefully make me feel better.
2006-12-25 23:08:16 · answer #4 · answered by Monie D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not crazy. You're in pain. You were in pain when you met him and you are in more pain now. You chose him because he numbed the pain inside you that was already there. Accepting ridiculous behavior from someone you love just for the sake of being loved by them or having someone in your life is a sign that you have some esteem issues. When you love yourself, darlin, you will not choose to be with a man who brings chaos and pain into your life. I recommend that you get some counseling and learn how to love yourself. No one person should cause you to feel lost when they are gone. That's not a healthy love. Be blessed!
2006-12-25 23:06:57 · answer #5 · answered by Terri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheer up and get some counselling. I went through a divorce and my first Christmas, I was alone. It was miserable. I lost weight, got in shape, and I just finished a great Christmas with my new wife. She is wonderful. We have been married 3 months. It gets better. You must feel pain to truly know happiness. So since your pain cant get much worse, happiness is coming if you work on yourself. If you dont work on yourself, you will continue to be miserable.
2006-12-25 23:04:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get ahold of yourself girl!!
I know how you feel, I am recently divorced as well. You have to find an outlet for your pain. You seriously need counseling. I know that it is one of the loneliest time of year when you are recently divorced, but you can't keep this up!! Stop sleeping with him. All that does is make it worse. You need to break the ties and get over this relationship.
2006-12-25 23:19:58 · answer #7 · answered by TotallylovesTodd! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you aren't crazy. I am also hurting. See I found out that the man I love is a scammer. And he is trying to get money out of me and I won't send it to him. I am very much in love with him and it hurts to know he is this kind of person. When you love somebody it is hard to break it off.Because you feel like no one else will want you or treat you right. But that is were we are wrong. There is someone out there for us who will treat us right. It just takes time.
2006-12-25 23:07:55 · answer #8 · answered by Andie F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not crazy. But, you are worth more than just being his ex wife. Breaking up is devestating, and if you still have feelings for him that makes it more complicated. But, sleeping with him and helping him gives him power over YOUR life. You need your sense of self back. good luck.
2006-12-25 23:05:39 · answer #9 · answered by luvnlvn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please don't do anything crazy first of all , its not worth it. second i know you are hurting and you think its never gonna get any better, but i promise you it will!! i was in position once and all it did was hurt me more. i thought i couldn't live without him too, but i was wrong and so are you. first thing is to please seek counseling , its a life saver!! you need someone to listen to you without judging and help you with ways to get past your misplaced feelings. your to good to keep letting him come back for just sex!! you need to realize that you can be a whole person without him. once you can start to see that your a good, decent, wonderful person who deserves to loved and not used you will find that your life is worthwhile and so are you!! please dont be a victim anymore. you CAN do this!! GOOD LUCK!!
2006-12-25 23:08:27 · answer #10 · answered by onyx maiden 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋