New girlfriend, almost 2 months now. We go to college and are inseparable, usually. Now she's at home because her older siblings are there and she's spending a lot of family time and it's too soon for me to start spending x-mas with her fam, but my family lives in another state. I don't have the money to go see my family twice so I'm waiting until after x-mas so I can take her for new years to meet them. So I'm spending x-mas alone, waiting on her while she's having a good old time with her family. And her brother is in town from the military and since he's been in town I only get to talk to her about 30 minutes a day. I really feel like I'm on the back burner right now and it's a total flip from how things usually are. She says she feels bad that I'm alone this x-mas break but [sarcasm] I can reallly tell, haha. Am I being irrational? I really feel like she's having her cake and eating it too right now, but should I?
2006-12-25 07:20:32 · 15 answers · asked by GStar4 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you should be happy for her that she gets to see her family. I do get where your coming from but, at the same time be happy that she can be with them. I think you are just a little jealous because you are not with your family right now. also maybe a little jealous that you are taking her to meet your parents and she didnt take you. Just keep in mind that this is only for a few days and she will be back with you very soon.
2006-12-25 07:25:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ask yourself how would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot? Would she have the right to be upset over you spending time with your family instead? This is the time of year for family and showing love, even small sacrifies such what you are doing. Blood always comes first! You have to feel good about yourself for letting her go , it really shows the degree of love you have for her, whichis unselfish. I really don't understand why you didn't go with her...you could have shared in the joy, even if you had stayed in a hotel??? Perphaps you felt you would have taken away from her family in some way. Don't be mad , don't be mean...you two still have New Year's to be together....use that to make up for lost time. Do something really special with her / for her.....everything will be okay!!!!You've done a noble thing for someone you care about for Christmas.
2006-12-25 15:39:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop being angry right now. You are feeling sorry for yourself. Just be glad that you will be seeing your family after Christmas and be glad this girl is spending time with a family that loves her. Christmas is the time to wish others well and your jealousy right now doesn't fit in with the season. Next time you talk to her tell her how happy you are and you miss her and will see her soon. Go read a book, go for a walk or watch a movie and stop focusing on yourself and your troubles. There are so many people around this world that will be lucky if they ever see their families again and you are making all this fuss over nothing. Hope this helps and good luck to you.
2006-12-25 16:05:03 · answer #3 · answered by Deirdre O 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Having her cake and eating it too means that she's boning some guy while you're sitting alone with your pud.
Your REAL situation is totally different. You're feeling neglected even more so because you know she's having a good time without you.
That's what life is about brother. Give and take. Don't give her **** about it, don't feel all sad and tell her about.....do nothing but say good things about her and how it's great for her to see her brother who's been in the military.
It's XMAS time...it's not about you. Family, no matter what, always comes first.
She'll come later...if you know what I mean!
I'm curious though why you feel the need to run her over to mom and dads for new years eve...if it's too early in the relationship for you to hang with her family for the holidays...why would you take her to meet yours a week from now?
You sound like a guy who falls for chicks hard and fast...trust me dude....there's a MILLION fkn fish in the sea....play with this one, just don't buy it and keep it forever.
Play the field!
2006-12-25 15:25:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would feel bad if I were you too. I think she's being inconsiderate knowing that you are alone, and you guys are going out? But maybe it's her family, and she has no control over this. Her family might be the kind that really needs to be close to someone before they can include them in their family holidays. So, even though you and the girl are close, they don't feel any committment to you.
Maybe this is something you should take another look at. Your family is obviously not like hers. They are going to welcome her with open arms for New Year's. So, with the differences in both your families already showing up, is she someone you might want to spend your life with? Or might you be happier with a girl that has the same values as you and your family. Just something to think about before you invest more time in this relationship.
For today, go find someone else who is alone to spend the day with and do things that make you happy.
Merry Christmas!
2006-12-25 15:23:31 · answer #5 · answered by ThatLady 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I can see you really love this girl. But it also sounds like she needs to spend time with her family. She's not rejecting you, she's spreading her love around. Let her go back to her nest, you've got to understand that she won't always be with you. You have the right to be angry, I would be too if I was alone on Christmas. But you can stop thinking about her if you'd like, do something good for yourself. It's not like your breaking up, you still love each other, but sometimes a couple needs some time away from each other. There are other people in their lives too.
2006-12-25 15:33:31 · answer #6 · answered by SG 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well i dont think that you should be angry over it. She loves you, but she has family that she wants to spend time with. Think of it this way if you had the money wouldnt you go see your family? And isnt family suppose to come before relationships?? She feels really bad, but she loves you so hang in there!!
2006-12-25 15:24:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Since you made the choice to stay at home and be a wuss, you have to suffer for it now....what do expect her to do leave her family because you dont feel its the right ime to meet her fam...but you want her to go with u new years to your family and now you r mad because shes enjoying spending time with her fam stop being selfish, if you dont let her enjoy her time with her fam and stop trying to make her feel guilty you will regret it one way or another trust me .....
2006-12-25 15:38:30 · answer #8 · answered by Sunshyne 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My question is why is it too early to meet her family if you're taking her to meet yours? I don't understand. I think that you should have not put off your decision to spend Christmas with your family just for her. I think that you made the decisions, and then you don't like them. Perhaps you need to make better decisions in the future.
2006-12-25 15:24:43 · answer #9 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You don't have the right to be angry and if you really love her, you'd be happy that she's home in the warmth of her family for Xmas. Grow up. There are thousands of men and women probably about your age having Xmas in Afghanistan and in Iraq.
2006-12-25 15:23:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋