My co-worker has a nasty attitude and picks on me alot. Telling her off made her worse. After a while, I told my supervisor who told her to stop, but it got even worse. My supervisor won't separate us into different offices, and I don't want a different job. What should I do?
2006-12-25 03:10:23 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
There are lots of ways to deal with this. It is helpful to know that its just a test (of life) that calls you to practice taking responsibility for your own response regardless of others' actions. To be proactive versus reactive as Steven Covey says in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
I can recommend a few books that have helped me with this dilemma.
7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Covey
Aikido In Everyday Life - Dobson
Celestine Prophecy: Experiential Guide (Section on Control Dramas) - Redfield & Adrienne
Good luck and feel free to contact me if you want to talk about specific strategies for coping.
Paraclete Performance
2006-12-25 03:20:28 · answer #1 · answered by cadelarge 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to her about it. If you make "I" statements, it won't sound combative or confrontational. Things like: "I feel as if you don't like me. Is it something I've done?" Whatever is appropriate for the situation. Never start an inquiry with "Why..?" or "You (always)...?" these are confrontational statements and arouse defensiveness in the other person.
Don't be judgmental or confrontational. You may discover her attitude is due to something not related to you. And you may make a friend.
Reporting her to the supervisor will not solve anything and will only make her more hostile. The key is to improve the situation, not escalate it.
I too have been in this situation and the above advice does work.
Good luck!
2006-12-25 11:25:20 · answer #2 · answered by The Gadfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the supervisor once more - and let him/her know that the situation could affect your productivity and you want to do the best work that you can for the company. If they do not fix the problem, you may need to leave the position. If they don't fix the problem then they must not think that it is that important to fix. Which is their loss. For now try to avaid the co-worker and document all attitudes and nasty comments made. Good Luck!
2006-12-25 11:25:10 · answer #3 · answered by happy_southernlady 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Female ***** eh! There is only one thing to do, take her outside, and explain to her, you have had enough of her rants! Then say to her, You don't really want to get angry, but you have no alternative, if she doesn't stop, you will smack her in the mouth, some assholes need puliing off their ego trips. Although you must be sure you can go through with it, she may call your bluff and say go on then! Don't slap her, just give her a quick head butt and wish her a happy new year!
This world is bigger enough for only ones, that can survive, just show her you can survive, otherwise you will have a life of hell and bullying. I mean that's only if you yourself are a female, if your a guy, jesus, don't lay a hand on her! Just a bucket of water over her head will sort it! Although you must warn her, screw the job, life is for living, you want society to control you, left right & centre.
I personally put two fingers up at society long ago, and I'm doing just fine, retired at 49. You come into the orld with nothing and you leave it with nothing, a little self realisation, will help you overcome your fears in the rat race!
2006-12-25 11:24:54 · answer #4 · answered by KSL 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your supervisor that a co-worker is creating a "hostile work environment" and that s/he should check with Human Resources as to the steps to be taken to correct the situation. Offer suggestions - transfer me or her to another office, etc. Inform her/him that there are other avenues that you can pursue, but you would rather have the situation handled internally.
({Other avenues" = EEOC)
2006-12-25 14:45:54 · answer #5 · answered by PALADIN 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does she pick on you? Are you allowing her to "push your buttons?" Is your job dependent on her participation?
Here is my advice and it is one of the hardest things to do...IGNORE her. Her attitude and her picking on you will be successful only if you react or respond. If you totally ignore her, this behavior will stop.
People do not understand that they are in control of their emotions. No one else can "make you feel" this way or that. It is your response to others actions that causes you to "feel" certain ways. Do not allow her to manipulate your emotions. Take control and again...IGNORE her.
2006-12-25 11:22:52 · answer #6 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoid her, give her the cold shoulder. I find when people are like that they are just jealous of you. They don't feel secure in their envoirment.
2006-12-25 11:20:09 · answer #7 · answered by Thomas S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her why she is so miserable, and then ask her if there is any way you could help.
2006-12-25 11:22:10 · answer #8 · answered by randall w 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋