Although my boyfriend knows that I love him so truly and genuinely, he seems not to appreciate what I have done for him. For Christmas, I sent a big gift package shipped from Vietnam to him and all the members of his family in the US. I don't mind it costs a lot for over sea shipment by DHL, I just want to make him happy. In the contrary, he gives me nothing and silence even a wish for Christmas. I never mean to get back what I give but I feel sad because he seems not to care about me or think of me on this holiday. I planned to come and see him in the US but failed to get visa approved. So, he wants me to pay the ticket for him to come and see me in Vietnam because he said he has no more extra money. He just spent a big sum of money to buy something wonderful to surprise me (I guess he bought a diamond ring to ask me for marrying him because he said he wants to marry me).
2006-12-24 16:29:18 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am very confused. I don’t know if he really loves me or just saying that to keep my heart. If he loves me and wants to marry me, why he does not care about me? Or is it because I show him so much love and thar makes him rely on it and he does not want to work more for our relationship?
I am very serious and thank you for all the answers!
Wish you a Happy Holiday!!!
2006-12-24 16:31:02 · update #1
If a man loves you he'll do anything not to make you worry. if he can't spent money on something so he could be with you then he could at least write you an email and assure you of the way he loves you. A man loves you if he cares about certain things that would make you feel good. He will not inflict any harm or intentionally hurt you. He should do something about the things you want and need and knows when he sould admit that he can't spend time with you but will compromise for other things just not to confuse you. A Man who loves you will try to talk out things and will make you feel confident enough to tell him that he's been a jerk to you lately and he's hurt you. If you know a man loves you, your communication is not this blurred. So think again, do you deserve to be treated this way? What really makes you happy? If this worries you then you might wanna think about how to work out things with him? Are you afraid that when you tell him he'll leave you? Then you'll know what kind of man he is and don't stick to what will be good for him. You should feel good about loving him and not worrying yourself and asking if he loves you. It only shows your relationship with him is not that strong. Talk it over. If time will not permit then write him a letter telling him about what and how you feel. If he respond negatively then think about where you are in this relationship with him. Maybe it's time you think about yourself too.It's not about the money or the time...it's your life. What your life would be if you live like this with him. In the long run will you be able to take and be ready to feel such a martyr wife!
2006-12-24 16:41:11 · answer #1 · answered by Sherry A 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't pay for the plane ticket. He is the man and the MAN pays and is usally the provider and takes the woman out and pays.
When he saves up enough money then let him come see you with his money and let him propose.
If he really wants to ask you to marry him he does love you. But I don't know if he really will ask you or not but I would just be patient and wait to see if he will ask you or not.
If he did something that upset you tell him HOW YOU FEEL. this is very important. Good luck!
2006-12-24 17:09:26 · answer #2 · answered by tina*21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not send him a plane ticket. On the contrary, you should stop speaking to him or emailing him for about three weeks. Let him worry about you. Be mysterious. No guy wants what they can have easily. Buy the book "The Rules" and study it like the bible. When you do talk to him, limit your conversation to about 15 minutes. (That is five more minutes then you should btw but I assume it's an overseas call.) Be friendly and nice when you do, but stop giving so much of yourself. Make him chase you. Guys love the chase. Start running so he has something to chase!
2006-12-24 16:34:43 · answer #3 · answered by Chula 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Whatever you do, DO NOT SEND MONEY FOR A PLANE TICKET.
He is taking advantage of your kindness. Some people mistake kindness for WEAKNESS.
Do not allow him to think of you as a weak person.
Stand up for what you think is acceptable and appropriate behaviour.
If he still doesn't comply with your wishes, get rid of him.
2006-12-24 17:47:53 · answer #4 · answered by Panama Jack 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DO NOT send him any money or a ticket to Viet Nam. You have invested too much in this relationship and he has not invested enough. Tell him to send your gift the way you sent his because you can not afford to send him a ticket. Meanwhile keep your options open and brace yourself for the end of this relationship.
2016-03-13 21:56:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to give so much goodies to gain love. When you over do it, you may spoil the person. Learn to communicate with him and understand him.
2006-12-25 12:16:04 · answer #6 · answered by AH HA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The "right" one wont be this hard. The "right" one will not play games, make you confused, treat you with disregard.
This is a great sign for you to show you that this is just not the right guy for you.
Real love is not that difficult. Its puting the other persons needs and best interest ahead of your own. And until it goes BOTH ways, its not right.
Its hard to face.. but he is just stating words... real love is ACTION, its in the DOING. He is not the right one.
2006-12-24 16:40:05 · answer #7 · answered by SunValleyLife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you send him money for a plane ticket , you will not see him or your money. Do you need a building to drop on your head to know when you are being used?
2006-12-25 08:23:03 · answer #8 · answered by shyone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I don't think it is advisable for you to pay for the air ticket. if he is serious about you, he will find time and pay you a visit. Until you see the surprises, please keep your finger cross coz anything can happened even though he said he will marry you.
2006-12-24 18:42:40 · answer #9 · answered by Clown & Joker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is using you. Get out of this and stay out of it.
2006-12-24 16:34:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋