I completely understand that by doing so you are causing the other person terrible amounts of probably undeserved pain but if what someone is doing is purely out of love is it the wrong thing to do? If one is going to tell the other but all the same has completely fallen out of love with one as result of falling fastly into love with another- are they really to blame? Can you accuse a heart of a crime? All my life people have told me to follow my heart- what if my hearts leads me somewhere immoral? I understand that prinicply you should wait til you're out of one relationship but what if then it's too late. Please, I am in no way trying to justify cheating i would just like to hear your opinions.
2006-12-24 15:27:20 · 49 answers · asked by Taylor M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Okay I think people are a little mad at me but listen- I have been cheated on, by my ex boyfriend of 2 years, and I'm not married and I don't have a boyfriend anymore- I was just thinking about why people do this...and i see that most people think it's completely wrong and i agree but i alos believe that sometimes the best things in this world take wrong doings. And I'm not saying to cheat but i do believe that in a few chosen and very select circumstances the pain the guilt the regret and the fear of what in unknown is what's "right"
2006-12-24 15:41:46 · update #1
y one more thing I'm not talking about cheating as being sex. I'm not talking about sexual desires or anything of the sort I'm refering to pure clean passion. Wanting to be around someone even if you shouldn't feel that way wanting to see someone or talk to someone other than your partner. I'm not talking about cheating with your body but cheating with your heart which may lead to cheating with your body and not telling your partner would be terrible absoloutly crazy and horribly rotten and cold blooded but if your heart leads you out of your boundaries into cheating and afterwards you tell your "partner" than like I said in certain circumstances I think it can be the right thing
2006-12-24 15:54:34 · update #2
The real issue is the dishonesty. Because of the dishonesty, everything you have ever said comes into question!
2006-12-24 16:03:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you've been there yourself, so surely you wouldn't want to go through the same humiliating, crushing and awful experience a second time, now would you?
I mean fair enough, you fall out of love with someone because you became attracted to someone else.
Ok, in that case it's a question of responsibility and respect.
Surely you can understand that your dumped boyfriend doesn't want your sould searching confession.
All truths are not necessary specially when they don't bring anything but harm.
It sounds to me that you are asking for this guy's forgiveness, understanding and ...BLESSING; so that just in case it might not work out the way you expected it to with other boy there.
Now come on.
Be an adult and don't try and justify what you know is not.
Make up your mind and then give the guy a break.
I'm not saying that you're evil or inhuman; But Whatever you do, you DO have to take complete responsibility for it.
That's the way it is.x
2006-12-24 21:58:19 · answer #2 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you ask me no its not that terrible. Let me explain people always get so up in a tree about having sex with someone that is not your partner because people in general often make the mistake of equating LOVE WITH SEX its not the same thing (to me anyway )to love someone doesn't mean you have to have sex with them and to have sex with someone doesn't mean you have to love them. But in every relationship I have had I know the key is to be honest, not cruel about your feelings just honest, because at the end of the day I'm sure your partner would want to know that you have feelings for someone else and make the decision to move on rather then live a lie,or Who knows he might be open to the idea of an open relationship if that's what you want but what ever you do don't string him along be honest with both parties involved. So life can move on which ever way it may go.
Good Luck
2006-12-25 22:48:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is that bad. Nothing good ever comes of it, and the person who is cheating is taking the coward's way out of dealing with what's causing them to cheat.
If you're cheating because you think you're in love with someone else, then just end the current relationship. They didn't sign up for being hurt, and the very least you can do is make a clean break and not hurt them further. Just because you're following your heart doesn't mean you have to drag someone who thinks you love them with you.
2006-12-24 16:05:58 · answer #4 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in your case you are saying is cheating on a partner really that bad if you have fallen out of love with them? but if you have fallen out of love with them why have you not already ended the relationship. i understand that some people stay with there partners for reasons such as children etc but in the long run this never works. i would say that cheating is bad no matter what the reasons. people get really hurt. people who cheat are just purely being selfish and acting out of self fulfilness. think how u would feel if you found out that you were being cheated on? i totally agree with the fact that you should follow your heart but in this respect you should call things off with your partner first. if the other person liked you enough they would wait for you and if not then it obviously wasnt meant to be.
2006-12-25 05:58:08 · answer #5 · answered by little angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating with the heart almost always leads to cheating in other ways. This medium is a prime example of anguish caused by partners sharing things with other people that they don't share with a partner. By doing that it breeches emotional trust for the partner who has been excluded......and, I am sorry, but for me the excuse that 'nothing happened' is irrelevant. The connection has been made, so, although it may not turn into a physical relationship 'something' has happened to the exclusion of the partner.
2006-12-25 05:44:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U can't cheat out of love if u really truly love someone u wuddn't think of being with anyone else. and the problem 2day is dat people love eachother and aren't in love with eachother. Think it's the same no big difference. Loving someone is just oh i love u which is easy 2 say. And being in love with someone takes time but whenu do u always want 2 be around dat person, u make them laugh and they make u laugh, and u know that person has your back and u have theeirs and u love the no matter what.
2006-12-24 15:37:27 · answer #7 · answered by Risky_Bizness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate...we all desire to be loved, and I believe it's in the cards for us. the guilt comes when we do it outside of the correct sequence. What you should have done was be honest with your current partner - set some boundaries for change without wavering. If it wasn't met, then move on guilt-free...a relationship is a commitment. if a person can't honor their commitment, then you're not at fault for trying, they're at fault for not trying. Get over the guilt. Step back, and do it right, then things will fall into place...
2006-12-24 15:34:31 · answer #8 · answered by eleven 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing wrong with falling out of love with a person if they did something to you or if you are not satisfied and cannot fix it. however, in those cases you have to try and talk to your partner and end the relationship. the immorality comes in when you cheat. is it bad to cheat? yes. if your heart is somewhere else, go there. do not keep ur heart running between two places. pick. it wil make you feel better and will be fair to your partners.
2006-12-24 15:34:03 · answer #9 · answered by X16 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have obviously never been in an adulterous relationship. There is nothing more painful and devastating to a person. If your so selfish that you can't control yourself then you have no right to be married or in a serious relationship. Maybe one day you will have the pleasure of having someone cheat on you and rip your heart out and you see if their explanation of how they didn't mean it to happen brings you any great comfort.
2006-12-24 15:35:32 · answer #10 · answered by Sally B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It has been going on for millions of years, somehow I don't think Yahoo! answers is going to stop it.
Monogamy is a dream. We should try to achieve the dream of course, but unfortunately to quote an old expression, "a rampant c**k has no conscience".
And I'll tel you another thing. As far as relationships go, a women is just like a chimpanzee, swinging through the trees. She doesn't let go of one branch, until she has a firm grip of the NEXT branch. So it's not cheating, it is only a natural behaviour.
There are a lot of idealistic people on here ( which is nice) but unrealistic, i'm afraid.
2006-12-24 17:44:47 · answer #11 · answered by Not Ecky Boy 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋