I have a close friend that has been married for 2 yrs and 6 months ago her 10y/o stepdaughter came to live with her and her husband and this child is out of control, she talks back and does not respect her AT ALL. She tries to discipline her but the child tells on her to her dad and he takes up for her, the little girl has been keeping diary of everything my friend says to her, the little lies all the time.They have even caught her watching Porn. They do not have any children together and the situation has went from bad to worse, my friend is so upset and has left twice in the last 6 months and went back, she is on the verge of leaving again becasue her husband is not helping the situation, he just making it worse by arguing with his wife constantly and acting very immature about the situation. The child's own mother will not take her back, she said if she comes back she will put her in a girls home. My question is if you were in this situation would you leave??
2006-12-24 12:31:55 · 12 answers · asked by *sexy mocha* 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes. It will get worse when she hits 12-13.
2006-12-24 12:34:59 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the husband is not willing to be on the same page as the wife (stepmother) he is only adding to the problem. As far as the child watching porn, this little girl is out of control. It really says something when the mother will not even have her back in her home. This little girl is in need of some serious counseling. And if the father is not willing to address the issues, get this child some counseling, and work together with his wife. I would leave, she is taking on a huge problem without any assistance. And this is horribly unfair. I would sit down with him and discuss these issues it nothing is resolved, I would leave him to deal with his own problems. Have a blessed Christmas and a joyous New Year! God bless****
2006-12-24 12:51:22 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think her "DAD" needs to give her the paddling of her life--doesnt have to "beat" her, just let her know who is in charge. The step m om has very little rights, as in some states it is not legal for the step parent to spank the step child and unfortunately the kids know the law-personally step child or not ----she is living under my roof and she will do as I say or she will not be doing anything and if that is not good enough for her---there is always juvenile detention homes for the unruly kids----they think they had it bad at home with dicipline--they run the homes like a Military Boot camp-personally I think its great. Plus the daddy is afraid to discipline his klid because she most likely has told him more than once she will call the cops on him--let her, just have her bags packed for her so when the Cops leave they take her with them...it works!!!
2006-12-25 05:52:13 · answer #3 · answered by nickle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
COUSELING, COUNSELING, COUNSELING!
No, I would not leave. It seems like the kid has some disciplinary issues.... if your friend could get her husband to get the three of them into counseling, I think it would be extremely beneficial. Most children that act out are doing it for a reason. Maybe she is angry. Kids that haven't been guided in the right direction don't know how to squash their hurt, anger, fear, etc. in the right way. Counseling could help the girl channel her emotions properly.
I wish your friend good luck. It's going to be a difficult journey, but if she really loves this man, she should try harder. The husband needs to be a little more supportive of your friend too. The couseling will be good for the ENTIRE family!
2006-12-24 12:42:25 · answer #4 · answered by Mel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Counseling. Husband needs to realize that wife is in pain and daughter is out of control . However, the child must respect the step-mom. Step-child is already disrepecting dad by not respecting his wife. Husband and wife must stand together and refuse to be divided. This is his blood child. Not your friends. I'm sure she must be trying all she knows. To think that he will not support her. That's enough to make anyone want to leave.
If he won't cooperate and go to counseling to address his wife and daughter's feelings. She should leave and stay gone. He's just not worth it!
2006-12-24 13:15:26 · answer #5 · answered by Snobunny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a relationships not even an relationship if her husband doesn't support her side of the story...if your friend really wants to work this out, it's gonna be a hell of a ride cuz that child's gonna do anything to change...u didn't mention how old this brat is, but if she's pretty young around under 10 years old, she may just need time to adjust to the change but if she's older, well she needs to adjust but if she's just plain brat, i'd leave cuz she's already conditioned to certain circumstances in her life of where she want to go & what she wants to do...she's got daddy wrapped around her bratty finger and he's not even helping or even trying to help solve this dilemma so this guy's gonna go!!!!!!!!!She doesn't need all this baggage so he should be dealing with the dirty laundry.
2006-12-24 12:51:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The step parent can't automatically assume control of the step child. The biological parent must take control, set rules and explain the step parents role-- to the child and to the step parent.
Being a step parent is never easy. I hope that everything works out for her.
2006-12-24 12:38:46 · answer #7 · answered by CyndiDrum 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would leave the situation as soon as possible. the man needs to step up to the plate and be a good role model for his daughter since she only has one parent in her life now. the girl needs to respect her stepmother as the woman of the house.
2006-12-24 12:36:47 · answer #8 · answered by Ambier 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend needs to sit down with her spouse and see if there is a way for them to work this out...sounds like he thinks his child can do no wrong...if he keeps it up she is going to ruin his marriage then she will be running the streets in a couple of years and then who knows_
2006-12-24 12:35:47 · answer #9 · answered by Chickybabe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes! Yes! Yes!
2006-12-24 13:01:58 · answer #10 · answered by old man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋