without sounding whiny i have to say i have low self esteem......?

Question

it sucks...i was wondering is there is anyway to perk my self up with out having my face in the mirror constantly...i'm either very vain or insecure...im not sure which..help me out

Answer 1

Your vanity is an extreme response to your insecurity. Because you feel insecure, you try to compensate by puffing yourself up, but you over-puff yourself and thus become vain, which makes you purge yourself by reinforcing your insecurity and so on.

Imagine, if you will, being hungry. Because you wait such a long time to eat (instead of eating moderately, and at regular intervals) you believe that you have to 'stuff' yourself in order to be full. Doing that makes you feel 'piggish', which means you feel bad about eating, which makes you wait a long time before eating again, etc etc etc.

Confidence is the allowing of the fact that we are, or have, self-worth. Knowing an answer in class, and raising our hand to answer, is not arrogance because we demonstrate that we, indeed, do know the answer. Where it becomes arrogance or vanity is when we go to an extreme: that we know EVERY answer or are the MOST beautiful person in the WORLD.

One can be beautiful without either having to accept that one is the most gorgeous ever or, if one isn't the most beautiful, that one must therefore be a dog. Cate Blanchett is a very fine actress, but so is Meg Ryan, Jodie Foster, Julia Roberts, and even Rosie O'Donnell. Imagine if there could be only 'one' actress, and the rest were simply pretenders?

We build our self-worth, like everything else in our life, slowly and personally. Your cd collection, for example, is not like anyone else's because it contains music that pertains personally to you. So it is with self-esteem. Our self-esteem must be custom made by ourselves, created out of the things to which we feel are our strengths (and even our weaknesses). And if we have no strengths (like, at one point, we had no cds in our collection) we begin by building upon the things we like, and growing them. If you like to draw, the more you draw, the better you get at it, and therefore you find your self-esteem from your ability to draw well.

You are not as lost as you may think. You simply have not had someone explain things in such a way as you could understand them, and thus, act upon them. We are all ignorant and beginners in something (I am still a beginner socializer).

Answer 2

I choose you're able to understand, which you have been created that way for a reason and you will no longer have each and all the solutions why at sixteen. you're able to love being distinctive, locate the thank you to repair your self up and create your own type. you desire to be like somebody else, yet I promise there is somebody else questioning that they choose they may well be such as you. It seems such as you a suitable weight because of the fact in case you desire to tone down and shape up with crunches or squats you could and nonetheless have a physique. Me on the different hand i'm super skinny--anybody thinks i'm anorexic, yet I consume each and all the time-- I lost my butt and that is taking a whilst to get it returned lol, yet all my pals are thick, so I stand out and that i've got made a recognition for myself and now i like it. i'm the queen of doing my own element. female you greater effective rock them glasses. Are you nerdy, punk rock, tomboy? locate the thank you to incorporate that throughout your look. basically be your self and human beings will seize directly to who you're. in the event that they do in contrast to you, you probably did no longer desire them in any case. et to be attentive to and love your self because you are the only you which you're able to be around each and all the time. Get to be attentive to and love your self because you are the only guy or woman that must be around you each and every and all the time. Oh and boys are overvalued--shop your self for a real guy :)

Answer 3

If you have low self esteem, try to think have you ever been insulted or hurt when you were a child.

Many phsycologiest said, our problems usually lies on what has happened in the childhood that result in personality problems in the future.

If you can think of something, tell yourself, you grow up already, you should not be affected by some one's malicious or careless actions.

Try to build up your self confidence, if you have any weakness, try to build it up, give your self sometime to achieve some small goals, let's say, in 6 month or 1 year. tell yourself whatever you do from now on, you don't want to be undervalued. in this way, when you act, you think before you act, and gradually things will turn around.

good luck.

Answer 4

If you are thirty or younger and you are asking this question...congratulations you are at least a decade ahead of your time. Our egos are so complex that it is possible to display vanity in some aspects of ourself yet lack the confidence to respect our own intuition. I have no answers for you. Just the suggestion that you read more about philisophy, religion and faith. Not to believe necessarily but understand how faith in something other than ourselves can help with esteem for who the self is.

Answer 5

you need to realise that who you are has absolutely nothing to do with what you look like. you have just confused what you present to everyone else(the made up you) and have lost who you really are.
When you findyourself without caring about what you look like on the outside you will find happiness. Don't be so harsh with yourself.

Answer 6

your beautiful babe