am i dumb for thinking i can marry my girlfriend and it would work out? i amo nly 20 years old?

Question

ive known her since 7th grade. we
ve dated for 1 1/2 years. im not saying im gonna go out and marry her right now but im maybe 2-3 years. we talk bout marriage and it sounds great

Answer 1

No, not necessaryly. You are never dumb for thinking it. Only dumb if you don't think it through, at all angles.

Can you support her? a family?
Are you ready to commit to one person?
How long have you known each other?
What do you have in common?
What are your common goals?
What do you both want in your future.

If you decide you do, see your priest or a counselor, to try to help yourself make the right decision. If you are asking yourself.. if you are dumb, you may be questioning whether you really are ready..... and in my opinion means you may not be ready.

Answer 2

Wait a while man. I was thinking the same thing when I was 20 and I was with my girl for six years. They start to change when they get older and so do you. If you don't experience other things it is very likely that you will have some doubts and want to try something new. This always happens eventually. Even though you are in love you will always wonder what else is out there. So will your girl. She will also want to try things. Then it will just come down to who the weakest link will be. In my case it was my girl. She ended up cheating on me. I never thought she would do it and neither did any one else but she did. In the end I was kinda happy because I wanted to try new things two. The best thing would be to wait for a while and maybe even give each other some space to really make sure this is what you want. remember that about 50% of marriages end in divorce. so you have to be care full about your decisions. You can still marry this girl in the future but maybe you should try other thing for a few years so that you can get things out of your system before you really commit. I wish I would have done that. Good luck man.

Answer 3

It really depends on how serious of a relationship you are in, and if you truly think that you can manage living life with her, and only her.

You also have to think about whether or not she's ready to be faithful on that level of commitment, as well.

I am 20yrs old, and I've been married for almost 5 months now. My husband is 21. We had some criticism when we got engaged when I was 19, but you have to trust how you feel, and this was said at our ceremony:

"The ring is made of gold, an element that is least easily tarnished. I charge you both today, never let anything or anybody tarnish the vows of love that you have consented to today."

"The ring is an endless circle, just as your love for each other must be endless. For the ring to be broken it takes an outside force. Never let any outside force exert pressure upon the vows that you have entered today."

Answer 4

So much can happen between 20 and 23. You are right to wait.

When you are young and in love it seems that everything is so urgent. I know she may seem the only one for you. I know you would love to hold her at night, have children with her, make plans for the future, but you have so much time for that kind of thing.

Try to wait. Take the time to know her better. Talk about how you feel about children, money, values, religion. These are the things that your lives together will be made of, the things that will either make or break your marriage.

You may think that minor disagreements in these areas don't matter but they can be the stumbling blocks that lead to major problems and divorce.

Don't break your own heart. Your own values must be clear before you begin a life with someone else. Live your life and let her live hers. Only when you begin to understand yourself fully can you begin to think about sharing your life in a mature way with someone else.

God luck to you, honey. Take the time to grow older, grow wiser and mature. No you're not dumb, but not ready either.

Answer 5

im am totally different now from when i was young so now that you know her young, wait a few years and get to know her as awoman. let love grow or find out the truth. ive been with this guy for ten years now. weve been to hell and back. im glad we waited because i know him so well and i know that i want to marry him. you cant learn enough about a person so young because they havent completely come into themselves yet. give it time. do it right. really know. maybe in like 5 years. the divorce rate is so high. i know it against alot of religions but why dont you try living together. trust me thats the true test. good luck

Answer 6

The ignorance isn't in the question, but the hesitation. THIS IS ONE TIME IGNORANCE IS A POSITIVE ATTRIBUTE!!!! This hesitation is your conscience telling you that you are not ready. Don't feel bad! It just means you have some unfinished business somewhere. Whether it is a need for a better pay check, maybe you still live with Mommy (you need to be on your own at least one year before you get hitched!), you feel you just haven't matured enough (I would say by your question that this isn't the case) or maybe (God forbid) this just isn't the girl for you. Good Luck!!!

Answer 7

There are no guarantees in life and if the two of you love each other and have been together for a while, and want to make this commitment, then go for it. Also, if you have doubts, just get engaged and wait at least one more year,
Good luck.

Answer 8

While you're young, you may be mature. If you're mature, you should be OK. However, you appear to have some doubts, so you should probably wait until those doubts are gone. You have plenty of time to get married, and enjoy a lifetime together. Good luck!

Answer 9

Yes very dumb! So be smart and wait and save yourself from getting a divorce so soon in your life.

Answer 10

no it's not crazy , you're not the only one... i was like that too, but just don't rush things too much , if you're not scared of commitment, she will eventually, take things slow.
... it's good to have commitment though.

good luck and merry x mas