i made friends with my neighbour (bloke) we got on great for a while, for the last year he's been saying he's to busy to pop in for a cuppa, i never get thanked for the things i do, been treated like crap really, he even humiliated me not saying how, but now i need to tell him enough is enough and i dont wanna know, how do i do it so that he knows i mean it, no nasty reply's please
2006-12-24
07:43:18
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14 answers
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asked by
leighlouise2000
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in
Family & Relationships
➔ Friends
I'm not entirely sure that you are making any sense at all. You made friends with a neighbor and now he is too busy for you...and you feel underappreciated....ok that makes sense but "he even humiliated me not saying how but now I need to tell him enough is enough and I dont wanna know"..........that doesn't make any sense...if you email me I'll try to help you
2006-12-24 07:48:16
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answer #1
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answered by Tiffany C 5
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Hello,
There are x2 methods you can and should use:-
No.1 Boundaries & setting firm boudaries.
The first is to draw clear or very clear boundaries around what you will and wont accept from him. But it sounds like he's taken advantage of your kindess & perhaps your boundaries have been unclear (blurred) which lead to a mildly abusive situation.
Now you need to set boundaries that are totally crystal clear & that means you need to draw a distinct line in the sand (metaphorically). It requires that you are far more assetive with him, if that means telling it straight to his face, telling him the trueth then fine. Do what is required but think what you want to say first before you actually face him.
No2. Withdrawl.
The less you see him, the less time and energy you give him. The more withdrawal you practise the more the relationship will wither on the vine as it were.
Comment:- There are in any relationships three positions or states of being.
* Moving towards someone
* Moving with someone
* Moving away from somoene
IR
2006-12-24 08:01:52
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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I think the real reason is your feeling a little rejected by him.Dont ask him if he wants to come round for a cuppa just leave him.If you want an answer from him just ask him if you have done something to upset him if not id just leave it,if he cant make time to pop in and see you hes not really a friend.
2006-12-28 03:58:25
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answer #3
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answered by skin 2
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I think he may have bitten off more than he can chew you may be innocently being freindly and he is getting the wrong impression.Just back off and try and find other thing to occupy yourself with. you might have scared him with an innocent remark and he has took it the wrong way so all he can think of doing is dis respecting you so you must take thehint and back off . your kind heartedness is wasted on this person
2006-12-24 09:49:28
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answer #4
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answered by The tagg master 3
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He's only your neighbour, join the rest of the country and just stop talking to him. If he asks for anything just say no!
2006-12-24 07:51:26
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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look if he wants to play Mrs ignorant, play him at hes own game don't answer the door don't go round and that's making it clear your not interested! or if you want to tell him in person just say i don't want to get involved with you anymore cus you treat me like something you scrape off the bottom of your shoes!! and just say that your not acting like a friend at all!!
2006-12-25 05:06:12
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answer #6
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answered by Zaski 2
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i could say to easily stay far off from her and not talk along with her. in case you desire to delete her off your facebook and attempt to repair issues with your ex. If he incredibly loves you that is going to artwork out. If she starts speaking crap approximately you, do no longer punch her.. this is basically going to reason greater issues for your self than that is going to her. yet i be attentive to ways no longer uncomplicated it somewhat is to easily permit somebody talk approximately you, yet in the tip its going to make her look like the fool no longer you. If somebody says some thing to you, all you're able to say is i've got not considered or talked to her in consistently so Idk the place she has gotten her documents and depart it. human beings like that desire interest. So do no longer provide her the attention she needs.
2016-10-28 07:29:10
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answer #7
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answered by ? 4
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explain to him how you just explained it to us, i would suggest writing him a letter.
two reasons for this:
1. he should feel it is concrete
2. if he starts to cause you difficulties and you need to take things into legal realms then you have some form of evidence on your side.
Good luck and hope you shouldn't need to use no. 2. x x
2006-12-24 07:49:40
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answer #8
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answered by truelylo 3
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How about you just let it drift and see if he notices? If he has been too busy for the tea, you be too busy to help and it will die a natural death
.
2006-12-28 04:20:20
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answer #9
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answered by Amanda K 7
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say it in a card and pop it through his door, then tell him if he wants to talk to you he could just for closure, but basically make it clear you don't want to know him.
2006-12-25 08:26:02
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answer #10
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answered by "*♥*Nafisa*♥*" 4
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