Ive been going out with my girl for 4 years, 2 of which we've lived together. We've had a great relationship, and we both figured we were each "the one", but Friday all of a sudden she says she needs talk with me, sits me down, and tells me she needs some space, like a week or so. Then everything calmed down and she wanted to carry on as usual, then tonight, Christmas Eve, it's happened again, and we're spending the night apart!
She says she loves me and cares for me, but she needs time and space to think about us. Not sure what that means, but i'm absolutely gutted, feel terrible, and i can't stand waiting around for her to make a potentially massive impact decision on my life!
What in gods name do i do? I want to call her, be with her so much right now, i can't stand the thought of losing her...i'm in a pretty bad way, as it feels like its all going wrong right now.. ;-(
2006-12-24 06:06:12 · 19 answers · asked by ChrisDB7 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sometimes we are so busy thinking impossible permutations & combinations that we miss some thing simple and obivious??Please stop Complusive Conclusive Thinking!
It could be that she wants something more than living together and is just tired waiting for you to propose marriage to her.
Woo her back mate..this is the season of romance!!Call her and tell her how miserable you are without her..come on love is selfless and is not about issues and ego's..No power play..No waiting games..No mind games..
Get your love back..get her back where she belongs with you!!A hug,a kiss, is all it takes!
Life is simple we make it complex and get caught in its web at a later date..
Luck and Cheers!!Rock together into 2007...
2006-12-24 07:14:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
And that is the only thing you can do. Wait. If it needs to work, then you ought to give her the time and space she needs. It hurts to think that after having a relationship with you, all of a sudden she got ''wise'' about this time and space thing. Honestly, as much as I hate to say, it is not you, but her, who is confused. And then even if this confused woman would have told you that she loves you, and carried around the way you want it, I am sure this ''space and time'' thing would be there in her mind. So the best obviously would be to go along with the ''space and time'' thing.
During this period of waiting, and allowing her time and space, I think you should take a long look at yourself. You do love her, but from your side, what is it that makes her want time and space. Four years is a long time. There may have been issues, differences between you and her, perhaps possessive attitude (from her or your side), so many things, that you may have over looked. While I believe that it could be cos' she is confused, and most probably two timing you (which i hate to say), you must really really reveiw yourself. Take things from there. Wait, watch and listen. If you really come to the conclusion that she may be playing around please move on. Thats it.
good luck
2006-12-24 15:09:31 · answer #2 · answered by arya 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she is making a play for marriage. When a girl says she wants some space they are normally talking about taking over your space…commonly called marriage. Did you guys ever discuss marriage especially immediately prior to this drama? Were you in anyway skirting the subject about marriage? Well I am not going to tell you to marry her or not, however, pretty soon you will have to think about it. Maybe you will have chat to her about the reasons you re not ready to marry at the moment or what if any are your plans in that direction. Anyway don't panic girls want to get married you know, especially after 4 years of courtship, staying together etc. Well its Christmas so phone her and tell her you want to be with her and you want to discuss serious future plans with her… Wishing you guys and your families, “A Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year.”
2006-12-24 15:32:27 · answer #3 · answered by the Tramp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can read this two ways. The first is that she has already decided to move on. The second is that she is ready to go to the next level (getting married). You must realize that most women want to get married (not just live together), but before you make that move, I suggest you talk about what she did on the days she needed to be alone. Make sure she didn't get another Lover (male or female), then go ahead and marry the woman.
P.S: You already lived together for two years in some states she would be considered your wife anyway. Go ahead and make it legal.
2006-12-24 14:18:42 · answer #4 · answered by Daddy Big Dawg 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well prepare for the worse I guess this happend to me a long time ago the space she wanted was with another man I took it hard but ya know what you will live and for revenge they say living well is the best revenge take care of yourself and for God's sake give yourself some time to chill and don't jump into another relatiotship real quick and remember it takes two to tango so it's not all your fault for every door that closes another opens
2006-12-24 15:06:35 · answer #5 · answered by Ron S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, at this point there is not much you can do. Maybe it is best to give her some space---who knows for certain. Is better to ask for the space now as to get married then want out . If she continues to maybe "play" these undecided games--------if it were me----I wouldnt put up with it. I would give it some time then I would be the one to make that decision and I would NOT be the one waiting.
2006-12-24 14:13:45 · answer #6 · answered by nickle 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
just got o her n tell her what Ur feeling about this all
ask her y she wants space for is it u or is she not interested in this relationship anymore or she is trying to figUre out how she exactly feels about ur relationship
whatever the answer may be but at least u will be facing the truth n not waiting like fool there
if any workout is to be done in Ur relationship then just do it
happy Christmas
god bless you.
2006-12-25 04:30:42 · answer #7 · answered by shabana o 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all need space to regain who we are--something that is lost when in a relationship, as a lot of compromise is needed. Space is good. Let her do her own thing for a while. In all relationships people need space to be themselves and grow. Don't worry too much. It just means she's overwhelmed by you. It could be a good thing to be overwhelmed. But even too much love is a bad thing.
2006-12-24 15:19:35 · answer #8 · answered by crazyloonynice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She been with you to long and she what to move on with her live and she is afraid to tell you.Just talk to her and ask her and if she do live you just move on with you're life you're great men and you need someone how make you happy.
Good Luck!
2006-12-24 14:30:31 · answer #9 · answered by Sweetlove 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
something is probably going on with her and i sould be very concerned. these things don't happen this way when love is real. she might have another relationship that she's contemplating and wants to see how it will go. i would have difficulty trusting her. be careful.
2006-12-24 17:27:31 · answer #10 · answered by heyrobo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋