why do I have such an issue with this, I am usually the one who cleans up, but nobody, I mean nobody helped or offered to help, and you would think by now it wouldn't throw me for such a loop. My stepdaughter, her hubby and baby and my stepson all went downstairs saying they were tired, hubby passed out from too much drink, and my guests, who I did not expect to help all left, and there I was all alone with the mess. I guess I'm just venting and disapointed, but I need to snap myself out of this funk, because tomorrow needs to be a special day.
2006-12-24 04:22:18 · 8 answers · asked by reddevilbloodymary 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You, like all mothers are special.
Unfortunately, their children and spouse often believe --Mom's got things in check-- as mom's always have things in check.
They rarely see or acknowledge the stuff that goes on behind the curtain. They see a wizard, not the curtain-hidden hard work.
Stop the pattern, let them know you would like help. Do this in advance. Enlist volunteers before the event. Let them know, in enlisting, how tired you get after such an event, given you've spent a good part of the week shopping, and the full day preparing the event, to the point of getting very tired.
You will be no less the mother for this.
I hope the kids/hubby, step up to the plate to offer you relief.
If you don't do this, consider it Your decision to continue the pattern, relieving yourself with only an after-event venting exercise and disappointment with your family. For me, this would not be my optimal choice, as choosing to let the family disappoint me does not make for a healthy environment.
Don't set them up this way -- Don't set you up this way.
There will be other true disappointments which you will have to deal with, no need to manufacture any.
As once a kid who also was too blind to see the work behind the curtain of my mother's efforts -- Thank You, and thank all the mothers out there as they struggle behind the curtain during the holiday season.
Best of luck.
2006-12-24 04:52:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I feel for you. I'm the oldest out of my siblings, and I ALWAYS get stuck with the work around the house. I never understand how people can just sit there, even though they can clearly see that something needs to be picked up. I fixed the problem though. I went on strike for about a week and stopped talking to everyone. Eventually the house got so disgusting and everyone cleaned it up. Now I have a chore sheet hanging on the kitchen wall. Also, whenever we have big dinner parties, I make sure to expressly post a notice that each person has a certain task afterwards, that way I'm not left with an overwhelming mess. I hope something I said helped!! Merry Chrsitmas and Good Luck!
2006-12-24 12:26:40 · answer #2 · answered by Aha! I Caught You! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are the mom it is always the way it is. If you wanted the party then everyone thinks that it is your job. Don't have a party for them next year see how that goes for them...
Good Luck...
2006-12-24 22:45:46 · answer #3 · answered by justwondering 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make your feelings known next time. People will disappoint us more often than not, so next time, make it clear to some people that you need their help cleaning up afterwards.
2006-12-24 12:24:26 · answer #4 · answered by â¤??? ?å???? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you are so down but that is the way people are. Have a Merry Christmas and don't let people get you down.
2006-12-24 12:31:21 · answer #5 · answered by twofour99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's how people are. Expect the very least from people and you wont be disappointed.
2006-12-24 12:25:41 · answer #6 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea u need 2speak up bout it or there jus gonna keep doin it
2006-12-24 15:29:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats does suck that nobody got off their butt to help you. next time ask for help .
2006-12-24 12:41:58 · answer #8 · answered by IT'S JUST ME ! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋