Should I forgive?

Question

My wife is having a cybersex online affair with another man for the last 2 months and is getting very hot and madly in love. They even exchange personal private photos showing each other's private parts sending through e-mails and IM and have sex talk almost on a daily basis for hours. I get to know about the whole thing. Should I forgive her?? Does she love me truly? So far no meeting between them yet.

Answer 1

No you shouldnt forgive her in a sense to stay with her. She is still "cheating" and unless your cool with that. I dont know, its what you think in your heart. Do you honestly want to stay with someone who is getting off with another guy, and sending naked pictures of herself. Thats not cool. If that is what turns her on. Get another computer and do it with her so she doesnt look elsewhere.

Answer 2

This is not the behavior someone should bring to a marriage. I don't know if you should forgive her. But if I were you..I wouldn't trust her. She took vows with you and she should honor them by being exclusive to you in every way! I hope you have no children because this may very well end badly. Also, she may end up with what she thought were personal pictures of her to her on line lover (and that is what he is) plastered all over the inter-net. She is demeaning your marriage and obliterating your respect for her and her own self respect if she has any left. Look closely at yourself and ask yourself if you would ever do this to her. If not, you have different moral standards and that is difficult to change. If you want to save your marriage and she is willing you could try counseling, but if you don't want to...who could blame you. Either way insist the cheating stop now. Do not be her doormat, you'll never feel good about yourself if you allow this. P.S. By the way the bible does not say that you can not remarry. The criteria for re-marrying is if the other person commits adultery. This IS adultery. If you care to address this biblically. At least make sure you are getting the right information.

Answer 3

Cybersex is a taste of what real life cheating will feel like. And if it leads to that then that, in my book, it unforgiveable. It sounds like she's missing the spark in her own bed. Ask her to stop the cybersex and to respect you and your feelings. Get some professional help and rekindle the spark you and your wife once had. It is possible if you both try. Get creative on what excites both of you and remind her of how hot it can be in her own bed with her very own real life man!

Answer 4

I am sorry Frankie,you must be hurting.Please do not forgive her.You deserve better.What she did was so disrespectful to you and your marriage.Once she said "I Do" her private parts became "for your eyes only."If she truly loved you the hours she spends talking about sex with another man would be spent with you or about you.if you were at work she sould be planning a beautiful dinner and her for dessert.
For some reason though,some of us,just cant get enough pain so..if you chose to forgive throw away the computer and go to counselling. I wish you the very best of luck either way.Make 2007 your year

Answer 5

Well coming from personal experience I don't think you will get over it. My husband did this with a women. They met but never had an opportunitiy to do anything in person cause i was there and her husband was there at the time her husband and i didn't knwo of what was going on. You will never trust her or feel better and who knows how far they might go if they get the chance move on hun its not worth the trouble the only reason i have waited as long as i have is cause we have three small chilren but i am on my way out the door. or he is lol

Answer 6

I dont know if you should forgive her or not. You need to test her and see if she really loves you. Maybe she does love you, but maybe you are not giving her all the sex she needs or something like that. I think you should ask your wife why she is doing this.
I would not sit and listen to my wife or husband have cybersex everyday for hours. I would definetly find out why shes doing this and I would put a stop to it.

Answer 7

Let her know that this is a betrayal, since he actually sent pictures of herself that is disrespect, noone else should be seeing anything from each other but you two. You can choose to forgive your wife, but honestly let her know that she is really going to have to reearn all the respect and trust that you once had towards her. Hear her out on how she feels about this, and if you feel you cant even begin to try and work this out, drop her and move on to better things. good luck

Answer 8

No one can tell you that you should forgive your wife. You have to ask yourself if you really can forgive her - can you put this behind you, not hold it against her?
Is she willing to end the affair? Do you think you could trust her again?
There are a lot of questions that you and her need to answer before you decide to carry on with your relationship.
I hope things work out well for you.

Answer 9

My husband (now Ex) did this too. They were probably doing it together. LOL All Kidding aside I ended up finding him in bed with the woman. She lived 4 hours away and ended up at my house when i came home from work. I was invited but instead invited her outside to go some rounds. Then him. Get rid of her butt and find someone who can treat you good.

Answer 10

giving and forgivings are the essential part of living friend. you go till you can tolearate, make her understand that you know, its wrong. Patience and tolerance will pay to you. one day or later, the other crap will surely dumped her when his motive is satisfied.

you might talk to other person as well that its creating problem to your marraige life.

try your best with all the options you can think off. may be your wife has temporarily gone out of way.