and are quite unsuited to each other. I do not have any lustful feelings towards her (even though she is very pretty) and I like her friendship and don't want to scare her away.
When I see her smile or hear her voice my heart does backflips, and when she and I part I am near tears.
I miss her when we're apart and look forward eagerly to the next time we'll see each other. I have already asked her out once and she has said no and made it clear that that no is permanent even though we are still friends.
For all sorts of reasons we would not work anyway. (I'm 34 she's 17, I'm scraping for a living and her family are wealthy, She's beautiful fashion conscious and artistic I'm a bit of a boor etc.)
All I want to know is....
How do I stop my heart from aching for her presence?
2006-12-23 19:07:51 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
WHOA WHOA WHOA. Almost everyone seems to have missed the bit about NO LUSTFUL FEELINGS. Imeant that. I'm not sleeping with her and don't really want to. She's way to young for me. I'm physically attracted to women not little girls! The question was, "how do I stop my HEART aching for her presence?" Geez, World, get your perverted minds out of the gutter!
2006-12-23 20:10:03 · update #1
Come on, don't kid yourself. You are almost old enough to be her father, give and take a couple of years. If your love is a platonic one, or like that of a father to a daughter, you better explain this to her. She would then perhaps respond positively, if you can convince her of your sincerity, as you say you don't have any feeling of lust towards her.
Your different social background may also have a bearing on her behavior, and in the absence of past history of both of you, it is difficult to say what could be the problem.
Please examine in your mind what you expect from her, and go ahead cultivating her friendship, only if your feelings transcend man-woman love as is normally understood.
2006-12-23 19:22:54 · answer #1 · answered by greenhorn 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even if everything worked out, you do realize that society automatically will reject you people being a couple because of the age difference right?
Besides that...
I believe you just "think" you love her. Maybe you are just such good friends with her that you can't recognize good friendly love and romance love differently. I suggest you take time off for a while and figure that out first. When you are SERIOUSLY SURE, I suggest you tell her. Tell her all that good stuff in your question. Whatever you do, DON'T SCARE AWAY HER FRIENDSHIP IF YOU ARE NOT COMPLETELY SURE YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH HER. The heart flipping stuff might be because you are so happy to see your friend. If you really do love her, just hope and wish she loves you back. If she really doesn't, tough luck man. Not everything works out in love. It isnt all like a romantic happy ending. But as you know, if all goes well, the not matching thing should work itself out. Just don't go through all the trouble for nothing.
2006-12-24 03:24:00 · answer #2 · answered by fatp3ngu1n 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How do you stop your heart form aching over her? - You wake up and realize it will never happen and accept the fact that there is someone who is even better for you (although you may not be able to imagine that) it's true. you'll find her someday and this 17year old is not the one. If she's sleeping with you then you're breaking the law and she's not considered able to make that decision maturly or responsibly. Please, do yourself and HER a favor, and move on. Cut off ties with her and do your best to realize someone better is out there for you!
2006-12-24 03:21:45 · answer #3 · answered by uknow 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
True love involves knowing how to let a person go for their sake and for their happiness.
If you really do love her, you won't need her to love you back. You'd give her what she truly deserves, and she doesn't deserve the burden of loving someone twice her age and all the consequences that come with that.
Love hurts. And that hurt doesn't really stop immediately. It lingers for long.
Just remember that she's happier like this. If you love her enough, her happiness should compensate for your pain.
2006-12-24 03:22:44 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Find a real woman...someone around your age or something like that...ask a woman you arent attracted to out..i dont mean she has to be ugly,just someone your comefortable with. Get to know her & you might start to like her...the woman of your dreams might be in front of you & you dont need anything in common...its kinda perverted to like someone half your age...she might feel that way because i kno i would.
2006-12-24 03:14:57 · answer #5 · answered by PinkLove6 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
shes too young for you, a MINOR. You need to back off and leave her alone. Find someone your own age or at least legal age.
2006-12-24 03:11:07 · answer #6 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOAH BUDDY THE ONLY PART I CAUGHT ONTO WAS IM 34 SHES 17 YOU NEED TO BACK UP A LIL FIND SOME ONE CLOSER TO YOUR AGE CAUSE IM PRETTY SURE SHE WNATS SOMEONE CLOSE TO HER AGE
2006-12-24 03:17:30 · answer #7 · answered by Vanessa Foo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋