im not accepted in the black community...why?

Question

im 15. half black and half chinese. i go to an all black school and its really ghetto. im black and i dont get why im not accepted. is it because my hair isnt in that fake hair and its just natural. cuz a lot of gurls dont like me and i never do anything bad. im always tryna be nice, but they laugh and call me mixed *****. i do talk to guys. as matter of fact, they're the only friends i can get. i also want to have gurls as friends so i can tell them my gurlie secrets. i cant tell a boy that stuff. i feel so left out cuz i wanna play double dutch and go to the mall with them. i also feel bad cuz i didnt mean to, but i had sex with one of the guys who are my friends and he had a gurl. i didnt even know he had a gurl. now she's mad at me and even more gurls hate me. because i dont feel accepted, i have slept with about 13 of my guy friends just so i can be accepted. i know its wrong, but that's the only way to get accepted around here. and right now im crying cuz i think im pregnant and

i dont know who the father is...im scared. u dont even know how i feel. i just need help plzzzzzzzzzzz....plz plz...i cant stop the tears from flowing.

any advice for me??? plzz be serious. i have no time for jokes.

Answer 1

im 17. im mixed too and i used to get that problem. i actually feel like im talking to myself cuz i used to do the same thing to get accepted. gurll...its not worth it. i have a 3 month old baby and the father is not even around. just dont do it. its gonna ruin you. plz...listen to me. just stay away from those guys. and as for those gurls...just be yourself. if they dont wanna be your friend. they're jealous and they want what you want. so be happy about it. remember, you're better than all of them losers.

Answer 2

Sweetheart- high school is the toughest time in the world. Sometimes people dont accept others and sometimes theres no even a reason! it could be because your not full black, or it could be because u r pretty and that threatens them, or it could be because you are nice and dont get in trouble like they do. BUT sweetheart u have GOT to STOP sleeping with all these guys! I know u r just looking for love- affection- a sense of belonging somewhere- but that is NOT the way to do it! These guys dont love you- they just want to sleep with you. That could be another reason the girls wont allow u in their groups too. Its okay to be who u are! Never be ashamed of your heritage! Your black and chinese and Im sure u r absolutely beautiful. Somewhere out there is a girl who needs a friend as badly as u do! Stop looking at all the trouble makers and snobs and look around- friendship could be closer than u know! And please stop with the sex! Especially if u r already pregnant! if u arent- consider yourself extrmemely lucky and stop having sex until u r much much older and then its with a man who loves u and respects you! Be yourself- dont change for anyone- and good luck to u

Answer 3

well im 16 and im mixed as well.....im mixed with black,white,and indian and i used to have the same problems and somehow i still do. my peers are always calling me white girl or milk, vanilla. im pretty light skinned and my hair is naturally curly. i have tried straightening my hair wearing braids and anything that they do just to fit in. to tell u the truth i dont believe in having sex until marriage thats just not something i would do even if i wanted to fit in that badly. of course now i have only 2 best friends in the whole wide world(well actually 4) my 2 best friends from school and God and Jesus. they are the ones that u really need to be like. im so sorry to know that u r going through this as well. but my mom told me to just remember that the only reason they are treating me this way is because they are jealous. they want hair like u they wish more than ever that they were mixed as well. dont be too hard on ur self and ignore thier ignorance. even though i consider myself black as well, i know deep down that most black people are very ignorant and they cant help that because of our past and the way we have been treated by other races that didnt except us for who we were. im not sayin that they are right for what they are doing but i am sayin that they need some manners and u need to just give them some time. PLEASE stop sleeping around because they may have an STD and they may not tell u that they have it and u could get it. having sex is not the answer to ur loneliness. u have family and the holy spirit of God and i say that is all u will ever need in this world. Im so sorry and i want u to know that even though i dont know u i love u soooooo much and i consider u to be my little sister. Take care of urself sweetie.

Answer 4

If I was in your shoes...

1. I would leave the BOYS alone.... because they are not really
your friends, because if you are pregnant, they won't help you
babysit after you have a child.

2. I would find out who is the daddy....

3. I would not have abortion. I would ask parents to help me out.
Or maybe a guidance counselor can help you out.

4. Go find a job, work at McDonald or something after school.
Ask guidance counselor to help you with that. Work at night
after school and work during the summer.

5. Forget making friend with girls, they are NOT important.

6. Get yourself an apartment after you graduate from school,
it would be so neat and fun... to live independent... wow.

7. And make sure you get all the financial assistance, such
as Welfare, WIC, food stamp... and after you know who
the daddy is... get the child support from him.

8. Ignore some of the negative things people say about you...
Nobody is perfect.

9. If you really want friends, then have some humors and
talk to people, tell them some jokes, and talk, and be a fun
person.... and don't sleep with their partners, okay? Okay.

God bless you.

Answer 5

I really understand exactly what you're saying i am mixed blk and white there was this guy i really liked and he didn' like me only because of the way i'm not all ghetto or whatever so i did all this stuff to mix in and when i finally did blend and got asked out i didn't have fun with his friends but i still really liked him so i wasn't me for two months until eventually i told him how i was feeling and how weird it was and you know it really helps to tell some1 i probably wouldn't tell my parents but there are so many other options he understood me and we didn't hang out with his friends so i didn't have to be something i'm not because it's not real and it's not me so really i encourage you to tell someone it'll help in so many ways

Answer 6

I am mixed as well - japanese, black, and white. It is hard to not be accepted by your own people. It is like a slap in the face and there is really nowhere to turn. The girls are probably jealous of the attention you receive but you are not doing yourself any good by sleeping with everyone. All it does is make you look and feel bad. It will only justify to the other girls that they shouldn't like you. Seeking love or attention that way gets you nowhere. Trust me.

Answer 7

Well wait for a while. Those girls are just jealous. Ignore them or transfer to another school that isn't all one race. And quit sleeping around that may be part of the reason why you aren't accepted by the other kids there.

Answer 8

Well blacks are of African descent. Majority of African Americans don't want 2 be associated with africans becus they considered them too dark skin, too black, with nappy short hair. Most African Americans are quick 2 say they are mixed becus it makes them feel superior and not lowly like a full black person.

Answer 9

I'm almost in the same situation. My parents are both from Africa, but I am an avid Japanophile. There are anime posters all over my walls, and I want to start a figure collection. My school doesn't have many blacks, but everyone calls me a "wannabe Asian." It sorta sucks, but you must ignore those wieners!
サヨナラ。　Oh yeah, stop having sex.

Answer 10

Wow, sweetheart. I feel your pain. First thing, stop sleeping with these guys.
Second, these girls are jealous. Get used to it. seriously. I know your pain, but you don't have to go that far. As far as the girls, stop worrying about them nappy headed hoes. You worry about yourself because obviously they're not trying to help you. As far as you being pregnant, do what you have to do to find the father. Handle your business as a mother. The worst thing you could do us get an abortion. You have to make the choice NOW to change your life around and prioritze. Ask a trusted adult for help.
God bless, I will keep you in my prayers.