My husband is a good man, but he rates a 0 when it comes to romance and showing affection. He also is very selfish when It comes to sex. As a provider and father and friend he's great.
But as a woman I get nothing from him. Help I've told him, but he doesn't get it. He only touchs me when he wants sex. He does'nt understand that a woman needs a kiss, or a hug outside the bedroom. We've been married 22 years and he just thinks I should know how he feels about me. I do know he loves me, but sometimes I would like a little proof.
2006-12-23 15:00:54 · 22 answers · asked by Vikki M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some men think if they work and bring home a paycheck, that is proof of love, they have not been brought up to show affection..I am not sure it will change by you asking for more...You can try, but tell him you two may needs some counseling....
2006-12-23 15:15:47 · answer #1 · answered by Brenda Soooooooooooooooooooooooo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's not getting the message by you talking to him, then I would recommend that you deny him the affections he takes for granted untils he concentrates on what you're telling him and takes the time to try and make you happy. Since you've been married so long I would suspect that it will take him a while to come around......but if he loves you he should want you to be happy too.
I had a similar situation with my last partner and the cold shoulder was very effective in getting him to REALLY listen and try to change.
2006-12-23 15:06:27 · answer #2 · answered by Seasonal_Company 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so which you're able to somewhat cry your self to sleep at evening because of the fact your large husband would not finished you? hear he could be a large guy yet that would not propose he's the terrific suited one for you. Being against divorce is large yet residing a depressing existence which you sense lonely in isn't any convenience. Are you going to sense a similar way in 5 years once you're nonetheless crying at evening. provide it some theory. a sprint soreness now could preclude you from allot of soreness later. understand what i'm asserting? good good fortune!
2016-11-23 14:17:01 · answer #3 · answered by nancey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell him in simple ways like showing him what you want.Most guys were raised to be rough and tough so alot of them never learned how to be gentle or to embrace a female without being a roughneck.When you want affection from him suggest that he massage you this way or that.Teach him how to carress you by giving him signs of your pleasure.He probably thinks he is doing OK so be understanding when you talk to him.His ego can be briused easily so think about what you will say first.When it comes to affection and sex most guys want to please there partner and a little instruction can be very rewarding for both of you.
2006-12-23 15:17:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check out the book "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. Everyone has their own style of showing and receiving love. It sounds like you like to receive by physical touch. I'll bet your husband has a different style of showing that he loves you - there are four others. The book will help you understand, and if you can get him to read it too, maybe he'll understand what you need better.
2006-12-23 15:07:47 · answer #5 · answered by SL_SF 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband is a workaholic and his cell phone never stops ringing when he comes home, so what I started do is just open my arms and say (HEY! I need a hug or I need a kiss) and he comes over and does it. Believe me after many times of this he got use to it then he just started without me asking for it (hey were my kiss or you did not ask for a hug today) men are easy we just have to show them the way. (No nagging men hate that)
2006-12-23 15:12:15 · answer #6 · answered by Ms Pollyanna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For someone who's been married for 22 years and doesn't know what to do in this situation is quite upsetting. You can't make him understand, but you can talk to him about your inner feelings. Besides, he's your Husband for God's sake. You don't need proof, just some reassurance, right? If you need a friend, I'm here for you! Here is my email, its: DSanchez1976@yahoo.com and my name is David.
2006-12-23 15:05:47 · answer #7 · answered by Mindscrambler 30 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to bring back some of the spark of when you were dating, touch him more with hugs and kisses. Talking does not seem to work so show him by you doing it first he might just catch on. Good Luck
2006-12-23 15:45:41 · answer #8 · answered by eeyoree rocks2003 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey that is a real sad thing to hear...i m sorry ....u hv married for 22 years now and it looks like there is not much communication in between u guys....u need to communicate often and always...it is good that atleast u hv told him in some way about it...but i guess u need to show him love u hv for him more openly and with lots of words....do things which young married couple do for each other..give him surprises ..change the way u look...many such things...bring the old days back coz ur relation is rusting...u need to polish it again
2006-12-23 15:07:16 · answer #9 · answered by suni 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You def. shouldn't be treated like that! The next try he trys to just touch you for sex, don't give it to him. During the day YOU come onto him and give him kisses, hugs, etc. Maybe he will catch on and realize he likes that kind of attention and will give it back to you!
2006-12-23 15:03:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋