i was heart broken
yes i was
now i know...
you told me things
every girl dreams to hear
you hurted me deep
wounds will never heal
you told me stories
no,it was a fairy tales
i was heart broken
yes i was
everything i know
and will know
every where
and every place i `ll go
i will see you
not the man of my dreams
just evil eyes looking
back at me
i was heart broken
yes i was
this heart of mine
has tried and tried
to feel love
to be loved
that greatest feeling
of all times
is it to much to ask?
to find someone to say
i love you
someone to give your life away
someone to hold you when you are down
someone to hang around
is it too much to ask?
yes it is
when you are heart broken
yes i was
2006-12-23 11:09:13 · 7 answers · asked by Music 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
Hey Bossy,
"you hurted me deep", should be "you hurt me deep".
It is a deep feeling poem, makes me feel bad for you, like a father, wants to say 'it will get better', 'he is out there somewhere waiting for you'.
2006-12-23 11:18:53 · answer #1 · answered by BuyTheSeaProperty 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
At first I was going to tell you to check your grammar and spelling but I was wrong.Leave it the way it is.This is the sort of poetry the world needs.Don't let anyone change it.Let it stand as it is and above all keep on writing other things,.When people try to tidy up a poem they so often kill the heart of the poem itself which is your heart felt feelings.You leave the way it is
2006-12-23 19:19:26 · answer #2 · answered by melbournewooferblue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you wrote that, then I think it's pretty good, considering i'm really bad at writing poems. So, good job!
2006-12-23 19:16:57 · answer #3 · answered by Shelby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good poetry . Good concept....but needs the following:
1- spell check
2- structure
3- grammar
4- form
5- rhythm
But if you have composed this from your heart...it is really good...the heart does not care for the above rules....
2006-12-23 19:40:59 · answer #4 · answered by deevoonay 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I wept for hours than I drank
2006-12-23 20:08:28 · answer #5 · answered by zero d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
but where is the poem!
the words are not glowing!
2006-12-23 19:46:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't like it
*Vam*
2006-12-23 22:09:14 · answer #7 · answered by Heartless Vampire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋