I never understood the psyche of a woman, and I am one myself! If you complement a woman, such as "Laura, you're hair looks amazing!" she goes on a rampage about how long it took this morning and she still doesn't think it looks good. Or if you tell her she looks great, she goes on and on about how fat she feels.
Why can't we just take compliments?
2006-12-23 05:36:43 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
It's a cultural thing, I think. Probably lots of media influence there. Because of TV, movies, magazines, billboards, we are made to feel less than good about ourselves. We internalize that, and when someone tries to say something good about us, those negative self-perceptions come flying out of our mouths.
Me, I usually take compliments great. Often I will say "thank you" and then agree if I'm feeling particularly saucy.
2006-12-23 07:30:50 · answer #1 · answered by ckmclements 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess women are just acknowledging that they are imperfect, pointing it out thinking that another person will notice sooner or later. Sometimes it's honesty- like Laura thinking her hair didn't come out that great, and feeling that you'll see later that it really is a bit messy. It is more gracious to take a compliment, sure, but society (in the US) puts such emphasis on appearance that it's hard to take a compliment. We know we don't measure up to the magazine covers (even though we know they're air brushed and touched up). Many of us female folk feel insecure enough to feel like a phoney for saying "thank you" when someone says we look nice, since we have X "wrong" with our appearance.
2006-12-25 15:27:51 · answer #2 · answered by AMEWzing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people can't take compliments. It's not always that they don't recognize them. They have personal issues that they sometimes don't realize haven't been resolved. A compliment brings to "the forefront" what they haven't resolved. If we as complementors could find a way to get the person being complimented to listen to themselves, we could solve the issue. Unfortunately, even if we could via methods such as tape or counseling, the person with the problem has to be willing to accept and realize they need help. To use bad english to make a point: "they ain't seekin' cuz they ain't realizin'." Happy Holidays!
2006-12-23 15:31:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women cannot take compliments because and put themselves down because we are brainwashed by the media into thinking the only way we can look beautiful is to look like movie stars and models. That way you keep hearing this over and over until you are brainwashed into feeling ugly and inferior. it is a shame that the female race has to deal with these issues just because society is obsessed what is on the outside and instead of the inside.
2006-12-23 19:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by nubian princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are insecure and lack self confidence. They also see those heroin addict looking models on the high fashion runways and think they are what the world perceives to be the ultimate definition of beauty. Look around, you know anybody who actually likes like that? The average woman weighs much more than they do (I don't mean they're fat), can't wear the clothes they do because they're built normally, and doesn't have a makeup and hair stylist fixing them to appear flawless before they go out into the public.
Look at what we guys marry! Those women look like the women we like to look at on a daily basis!
2006-12-23 13:49:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some women are not use to recieving compliments from other women, its some times a doggy,doggy world for us, we are so use to other women being harsh with their comments toward us, whether about our hair, the way we dress, our weight , etc.... so to recieve a compliment from another women is strange at times if we could get passed the shock, then we could get used to getting a compliment. Sometimes its self-esteem issues as well , lets just keep it real. We sometimes esteem others higher than ourselves.
2006-12-27 01:30:41 · answer #6 · answered by Priscilla B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because at heart we are all self conscious and need to be reminded that we look nice and that you care for us.
Just keep telling us our butts arn't too big, out hair looks good, we arn't fat, our cloths look nice ETC and we will be happy. Ignore our little phobia and we will go nuts, make sure you go nuts too and cry because you don't love us any more and then demand you prove how much you love us.
Sorry guys. It's a fact of life. Deal with it or learn to get along without us.
2006-12-26 17:40:45 · answer #7 · answered by Julie Hartford 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We take compliments. They are just delayed. Most of the time when we are alone we remember how nice it was for someone to tell us our hair looked good. When we fix our hair the next time we will remember someone liked my hair this way. Also the person who paid us the compliment is thought well of by us.
2006-12-23 13:46:22 · answer #8 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
as a woman i must say that we love compliments. that is why we put ourselves down such as i'm fat or i hate this hat, so that someone can say no youre not, you look great. we also seek reassurance.
2006-12-23 13:46:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally agree with you. As a fellow female, I find it infuriating. Like, I tell my bff that she's pretty snd she's all, "No I'm not." And I'm just like, why would I say it if I didn't mean it. Guys do not have this problem. I have worked on it, and I am now pretty good at takng a compliment.
I think it'd because our societ values modesty and so we automatically denigrate ourselves.
2006-12-23 15:26:05 · answer #10 · answered by LSD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋