We have been together for 2 years. I moved out last month so we can work out some problems. We are planning to get married soon. His mother and I do not see eye to eye on alot of things. Even though we spent the holidays at her place last year, he has decided not to include me and my kids for Christmas there this year. He says he is protecting us from possible drama(it wasnt drama last year) rather than taking the chance. Instead it hurts me and my kids. We have no family here cuz I moved from WA to MO to be with him. So it will just be us for Christmas. H says we can do dinner another day but Im bitter and feel like we are at the bottom of the list. Am I wrong for feeling this way? What should I do?
2006-12-22 18:53:41 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Even if two people are not seeing eye to eye on things, the other half in a person's life should continue to include you in family things, after all what is he gonna do once you both get married. He cannot keep you at home all the time while he goes away to his families house for the holidays. I would try sitting him down and having a serious talk with him and let him know that if he is doing this stuff now, than what is the future gonna be like, and if he continues to act this way than there is no sense in getting married if he continues to think there is always gonna be drama when you go to see his family.
2006-12-22 19:04:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I like to celebrate special occasions so no way I'm going to overlap Christmas and my wedding anniversary when each is so deserving of its own special day and celebration. Also, if you plan on guests, it's quite inconsiderate. I've been to a New Year's Eve wedding, but never heard of a Christmas wedding. I live in Canada so travel gets difficult that time of year, winter is not very popular for weddings. It's completely possible to marry on Christmas day, you might just have more difficulty finding a venue and vendors and convincing guests to choose you over their own plans. Keeping in mind also, not everyone celebrates Christmas, so if you were of a non-Christian faith you would have better luck with a December 25 wedding.
2016-05-23 01:15:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you! I know you love him, but him picking his family over you isn't loving you at all. I'm telling you this from experience. My fiance (we've been together for almost 7 years), is moving to North Carolina with his parents (he's 35 years old!). I found this out by reading it on his son's myspace. When I confronted him about it, he denied it at first; then a couple of months later he said he "decided to move back there with them". So, you need to move ahead and never look back. Getting married means taking on your own family, not moving wherever your family is moving, or excluding you from his part of the family. Good luck!
2006-12-22 19:10:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Either he's going to break it off w/ you and this is just the beginning or mom has made it clear since you moved out that your the problem and you hurt her little boy by moving out. You have to put him on the spot and make him give you an honest answer because you already know he's holding something back
2006-12-22 18:56:46 · answer #4 · answered by uknowme 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My first response when I read this was "wow"! How could he NOT include you in Christmas festivities...no, you AND your CHILDREN!? He is being VERY insensitive...no matter how you and his mom do not see eye to eye, you would think some ADULT in his family would call you to say "it's Christmas, please come by the house and bring the children"....you made a HUGE change in you and your childrens lives by moving there and his actions clearly speak louder than his words...
Leave him asap...I'm so sorry you have to subject your children thru this.
2006-12-22 19:24:26 · answer #5 · answered by M R 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell him you dont want to be protected from the drama and want to be able to work out the relationship between you and his mom. Keeping you from his mom wont help you get along any better, in fact, can only make it harder to understand each other. You have to take the proverbial 'high road' though if coversation does get rough.
2006-12-22 19:06:07 · answer #6 · answered by mike 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he is not including you now, he will not include you once you two get married. Let him go ahead and be with his mom because she will always be right no matter what you say or do.
2006-12-22 19:01:43 · answer #7 · answered by PRECIANA 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You two are broken up at this moment.His family is not your 'FAMILY" at this time. It is not a time to bring any stress on an awkward situation. Accept the dinner later.
2006-12-22 19:10:11 · answer #8 · answered by Pat C 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are not wrong I would rethink my decision to marry if I were you or this is how your future holidays will be. good luck and merry christmas
2006-12-22 23:06:24 · answer #9 · answered by kelsey 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
from my experience, taking a break to work out some problems, usually means that its pretty much over. guys dont consider being in a relationship if you're on a "break"
2006-12-22 20:52:38 · answer #10 · answered by Ellanora 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋