I never realized this till now but whenever I come across someone who seems to be "better" than me..physically/socially...I just seem to feel resentment towards them. i really hate this about myself and would like to stop. Please help!! Anyone else relate?
2006-12-22 17:49:38 · 26 answers · asked by jessp 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Jess,
We are told not to judge others. When we do we are trying to be as GOD is. HE will be the final authority at Judgment. I suggest that you read some scripture. Verses that I suggest are: Galatians 5:14-16; Galatians 5:18-21; Ephesians 4:30-32; 1John 2:9-11. These verses address Resentment. From there, I suggest that you begin a BIBLE STUDY with a group of non-denominational Christians in your neighborhood. Have a great holiday season with friends and family!!
Eds
2006-12-22 18:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by Eds 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all stop hating yourself is the first step. Once you build confidence, you won't feel so much envy. I used to feel the same way as you back in high school, trust me. I don't know how old you are but once you hit your 20's and you get a change of environment you see people's true colors. Just because someone is considered pretty/popular, etc doesn't mean theyhave any intellect. The greatest thing you can be is modest yet confident and have an open heart and mind to everyone. If you can't beat them, kill them with kindness and build on your strenths to improve your own self image. Don't worry :)
2006-12-22 17:53:25 · answer #2 · answered by citygurl8503 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Great that you agreed this thing. Like you there are many people with same problem. Just before few year I was same.
Then I realized by doing so we loose our peace of mind and gain nothing.
Close your eyes & think peacefully where this attitude will lead you to.
Isn't it better to what makes the next person better than you & try to build those qualities in you.
With the time you will get calm at heart & better person than before.
See...didn't I learned from you to dare to talk about our `short comings' in public ?
All the best!!!
2006-12-22 21:24:16 · answer #3 · answered by rh_ingenieux 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to encourage the "better" part. sometimes this helps. for example if you see someone who is " better" socially for any reason. may be because they laugh a lot. simply say to them you have a very nice smile i wish i had the same. when you let it out of your system in a nice way it will make a big difference in the way you later on think and react to it. an important fact here to consider also is what is it exactly that you mean by " better" than you? each person is so different and what you might think better than you many people might not. so for example if you think this person is better than you physically for any reason. many people might think you are just nuts for thinking that way. some people like thin, some like fat, some like black , some like white. there are not set rules for what is " better" than what. otherwise we would all have looked the same. so try to say out loud the good that you see or feel like " oh you have a very nice figure" or " you have a very nice tast in shoes" so on it will help you let it out of your system and also help you think of it from a different presepective and see if from a different corner. and it will also help you control your feelings because you let them out nicely.
best of luck
2006-12-22 18:37:44 · answer #4 · answered by DD 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try not to compare yourself as much to the other person. Everyone is so different that it wouldn't be fair to judge yourself to another. And if they've got good intentions toward you, you don't want to resent a person who shares your ideal traits of what you think makes someone 'better' than you.
It's natural to feel that way, don't fret, just try looking in a perspective other than your own.
2006-12-22 17:57:28 · answer #5 · answered by delicate insomniac 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just realize that God made everyone equal. nobody is any better or worse than anyone else. so don't let yourself feel resentment for people that you think are better than you because they're not.
just hold your head up and be the best that you can be! and remember to treat others the way you would want to be treated.
Best Wishes. and Merry Christmas!
2006-12-22 18:01:54 · answer #6 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is better than you. You just think they are and that breeds resentment. You have already taken the first step by admitting your feelings. Try to realize that everyone has their problems and some people would like to trade places with you.
2006-12-22 17:54:13 · answer #7 · answered by crazywoman88 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should realize that no one is better than you or lower than you. Just because someone is genetically blessed or socially active does not mean that they are any more of a person than you are. Nor is someone who is ugly or poor any less than you. You are judging people who you think are less than you to make yourself feel better but because you are doing this when you see someone who you think is more than you it is doing the exact opposit.. When you rid you life of judgement you will be able to overcome this.
Judging is a part of human nature (don' beat yourself up about it) but if you dwell on it, saying she is so fat or her is sooo ugly then it is becoming a part of you. You may notice these things, but next time if this happens and you think she is so ugly, follow the thought with, but it does not make her less than me. The same thing for someone who is attractive, if you think she is soooo pretty and manifest on this, of course you may feel insecure. But follow the thought with, she is not any better than me. You need to accept this both ways though, because if you still put a more of a value on yourself than others, you will still feel badly about yourself. I hope that helps.
2006-12-22 18:01:51 · answer #8 · answered by I carry your heart with me... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that's called jealousy..
honestly most of us feel the same way as you are when faced with a person that is better than you. it could be at school, your workplace, even at home (siblings).
w could never accept that there is someone out there that is better than us and with this you tend to hate people! you should remember and learn to accept it! We are created not to be perfect but sometimes you have to rely on your capabilities and talents to succeed and sometimes that makes people succeed more than others!
maybe you should start looking at yourself first! if you were doing your best and learn to hone you abilities for the future..
2006-12-22 18:02:51 · answer #9 · answered by jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i applaud you for admitting a flaw in your personality. many are in denial first off you need to understand that it all stems from your self worth (how you eel about yourself) once you start to realize that you are an intelligent beautiful human being with a good heart you will not feel inferior to others. and just because the person seems to be better please remember that they may be fighting their own inner demons and feeling the same way about you. Love yourself because no one else will good luck
2006-12-22 17:54:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋