out of the silence
astral enlightments
melting the spirit
into existence
past recollections
resting in silent
subconscious chambers
never remmembered
spirit and matter unite to create mortal life
physical awareness awakes to embrace solar lights
lights solar lights
natures might holds the key to all life
born to be and to see deeply feel
join and pain in ur life
predestination and karma remain at ur side
steady companions of fate circlyng like sattlites
2006-12-22 11:39:13 · 18 answers · asked by anger remain 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Other - Entertainment
Not really! Just a Little too deep about things that Nobody is sure of.
A Good Piece of writing will make you Laugh, Cry, feel Sad, Rejoice, Lament, remind you of something, Basically Make you feel SOME Kind of Emotion. Sorry But your Poem doesn't do that for me.
Write about the Things We KNOW. If ya want us to enjoy.
Not trying to be Harsh Just Criticizing as you asked.
Have a Good Day
2006-12-22 11:42:29 · answer #1 · answered by D B 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
8/10
2006-12-22 19:47:52 · answer #2 · answered by kunalsc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like it, you have a way with words.although it is far to personal to you for me to connect.
but all of us poets have a few of those types laying around.the meaning tis your buisness and no one elses.
i would like to know though,if i may...is it about birth? or just life in general? or am i way off? lol
2006-12-23 06:09:56 · answer #3 · answered by Dream 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in complete agreement with DB and mariefelq, they expressed my feelings so nicely.
2006-12-22 19:45:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
it sounds ok, but its a little too deep to comprehend
2006-12-22 20:06:09 · answer #5 · answered by amwolf2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's very nice.
2006-12-22 19:41:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like all the phrases...but it doesnt really connect
but you put together beautiful words
2006-12-22 19:47:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes its nice
2006-12-22 19:43:06 · answer #8 · answered by mariefel q 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea its cool it inspire me
2006-12-23 00:46:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
deep and thoughtful. something inspired you !
2006-12-22 19:47:50 · answer #10 · answered by spitfin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋