my daughter is 29 and still is living with me and has no job what should i do ?

Answer 1

I think you should treat her like a child. You should impose the same rules and restrictions that any good mother would for a small child. This should include a standard early bedtime, a suitable dress-code, and consistent discipline (spankings, corner-time, earlier bedtimes, etc.). Obviously, she would not be allowed to drive a car, go anywhere without adult supervision, or be disrespectful to adults.
Maybe she needs to be brought up again. And I would not hide that fact that she has been demoted from adulthood to childhood.

Answer 2

If it IS possible for her to get a job and she is just lazy and lackadaisical, have a sit down talk with her.

When you speak to her, have the classifieds in hand, an example of rent prices and areas and a mock budget estimating about what it will take for her to be on her own successfully.

Write a plan together using an estimate about how much she will make and how much she could set aside to get a deposit, first months rent, electric deposit ect...and set a projected date for her to leave.

Have her give you the money and save it for her until the projected date on the plan. Tell her you will help her with part of settling in such as furniture etc...but if she breaks the deal, kick her out by using tough love (change locks, lock windows etc...to force her to realize you mean it). Believe me, you would be doing her a favor using tough love in the long run to make her responsible and give her skills to survive...I've been on my own since 17 (my graduation day)...it was religion or the door as per my mom and I chose the door. I did anything I had to for survival and I still love my mom regardless.

If she is sincerely trying to find work but there is a high unemployement rate etc...AND she isn't a problem or if she finds work and contributes to the family, why not let her stay? That is home for her also.

Answer 3

Sounds like it's tough-love ultimatum time. It's hard, but even mother birds kick their babies out of the nest when they're big enough to fly on their own.

Give her 30 days to get a job. Start charging her rent, because anywhere she lives from now on, she'll have to pay rent. And if she doesn't pay, and won't get a job, do what any other landlord would do. Have her evicted. I'm sorry. That's harsh. But it's necessary if you don't want to still have the same problem when she's 39, 49, etc.

Answer 4

Set her up in an apartment (security and first month) and tell her she's on her own to figure out where the next and proceeding months' rent are coming from.

Answer 5

She lives with you, she pays you rent.
I'll bet she has no transportation either, so whatever job she does needs to be easy to commute to and from. It can't be out in the boonies where you have to drop her off and pick her up.

Answer 6

My mom is having the same problem with my sister. She is 54 and hardly ever worked. Stop this now before you are in the same boat!! Allowing her to take advantage of you is just enabling her. Please try some tough love! Good luck.

Answer 7

Tell her if she's living with you she has to work. Then help her find a job.

Answer 8

give her a limit of time to find work to pay rent. she should be responsible enough to do so. if not, at the end of that period, she is out. it is tough love but you aren't doing her any favors now. good luck.

Answer 9

Charge her rent/board. This way, she will have some incentive to earn some money.

Answer 10

you need to have a heart to heart talk with her & tell her how you feel also listen to what she got to say. be a little harder on her if not she never leave