OK, I'm divorced. Several times. #1 was physically abusive and a drug addict. I'm the one who left him. #2 truly was a no-fault divorce, but by the time we realized it was a misunderstanding, we were married to other people. We stayed friends until he died, and I'm still friends with his widow. #3 was gay and simply couldn't go on living a lie. But #4 and #5 simply walked out, leaving me absolutely baffled. Neither would give me a reason for wanting out, just that they changed their minds. I consider myself a good person and thought I was being a good wife. I don't know if I'm doing something to run them off, or if I'm just choosing jerks. Whatever happened to "till death do us part?"
2006-12-22 08:04:57 · 12 answers · asked by cruztacean1964 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
have you taken the time to look at why you attract men that leave? Perhaps un-covering your issues will enlighten you as to what make you want to rescue or be attracted to leavers.
2006-12-22 08:15:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most men do not leave without giving a reason. Usually the woman knows there is a problem. Intimacy is off, arguing too much, working too much, lack of ambition, all sorts of flags tell you this isn't working out. Then it could be they changed and just no longer feel a bond with you and it really is the truth. 5 marriages is a lot, you should consider taking time to get to know yourself and enjoy who you are so you can make better decisions on a spouse next time.
2006-12-22 08:14:02 · answer #2 · answered by Love to Love 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you considered getting a job? You'll need one once you are divorced. You could use some of your money for counseling if he won't pay. Atleast you'll feel better about having tried everything to save this marriage. Both parties generally lose big-time in a divorce situation. There will be attorney costs, and they could get out of control if both parties fight over everything. If your husband is as tight as you say he is, he'll fight to take it all. So it will be expensive. If i were in your shoes i'd first get a job and just start banking your paychecks in a separate account he doesn't have access too. I'd also start stashing as much cash as possible from the grocery budget etc. into that account but not so much as he will notice it immediately. I'd gather up all your jewelry and anything that is small and valuable and stash it in a safety deposit box where you have the new account i just suggested. You need to build yourself a nest egg that will enable you to survive while starting a new life. Use him for everything you can get to build this nest egg. You can start selling things he won't notice gone on yahoo auctions etc. Just about anything in a house has some value to it. so get busy and start identifying these things. List them in a password protected file on your computer. or download that list to a cd-rom or disc. Also, look in the phone book for attorneys that offer free consultations and go talk to several and get their opinions. Hope this helps and you can contact me for any additional questions should you have any.
2016-05-23 16:29:25 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if the problem may lie with you. If you have been married 5 times that ought to tell you something. You are not a good judge of character or you are looking for the wrong things in a man. They can't all be wrong and you are right. (5-1) ?
2006-12-22 08:16:05 · answer #4 · answered by Peepers 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW. Talk about somebody with some bad luck. You're probably not doing anything wrong, exept making a few bad choices in men. I bet you fall in love pretty fast and hard. If you want to e-mail me through here, I would like to talk with you. I'm a nice 43yr old man who is looking for a nice woman to share his life with.
2006-12-22 08:15:59 · answer #5 · answered by BigJake418 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
take time to get to know the person before you marry . . there should be no secrets between husband and wife except for whats in the box under the christmas tree with his name on it from you.
2006-12-22 08:14:12 · answer #6 · answered by Rainy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seek counselling to find out what may be the reason for so many marriages in your life. You lack insight.
2006-12-22 08:09:11 · answer #7 · answered by Raven 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like it is you.
To be honest you sound exactly like someone I know.
Maybe your bending over backwards for that person a little to much, and they get tired of getting everything they want. Then yo may have changed and decicded not to be giving any more, so they get tired of not getting anything.
If you like the person, you give a little, and they give a little. Then they will stay.
2006-12-22 08:10:11 · answer #8 · answered by David G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The answer could be to stop getting married.
Please don't get married again until you get some counseling so you'll find out what you're doing wrong.
2006-12-22 08:16:10 · answer #9 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should get to know the guy a little before you marry him!
2006-12-22 08:16:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋