If my husband were having an affair...?

Question

would he have sex with me every week? Would he kiss me and tell me that he loves me everyday? Would he cuddle with me in bed? Would he everytime we argue go to the other room until things cooled down come and try to talk about it. Would he look me in the eye and answer me with, " no, I am not cheating, I never have or ever will ? Can a man do all of these things with his wife everyday and still cheat? He works 7 days a week. When he is not working he is at home playing video games. He does not go out. But I fear that he is having an affair at work with the plant secutary or with one of his female coworkers. If he were cheating at work, would there be a way to know?

Answer 1

What makes you think or give you the idea that your husband is not being faithful? Is there a specific person that you think he is having an affair with? What has he done to make you think this? If he has not given you any indication that things have changed between the two of you, then there is nothing to be suspicious about.

From what you say he does and continues to do, it doesn't sound like he is. Usually when a man is having an affair, he stops giving as much affection to his wife. Seeing as how men have one track minds, they can really only focus on one thing, or one person ,at a time. He most likely would not continue to sleep with you if he were sleeping with someone else and most men can absolutely not look a woman in the eyes and knowingly lie. If you ask him about this and he gets defensive, I would be suspicious. But if he does not get defensive and is reassuring and is able to look you in the eyes, I would tend to believe him. Sometimes men are more affectionate when they feel guilty but more often than not, they pull away when they know they are doing something wrong and think you have caught onto them.

I think you need to discuss your insecurities and worries with your husband and perhaps he can put those fears aside for you so that the two of you can be happy. Just remember that the more you nag him about whether or not he is unfaithful, the more you will push him away if he is being honest.

Answer 2

Why do you think your husband is chating? Do you have any proof or do you have a reason to think this way? Are you assuming something that maybe you are reading into waht someone else has said at one time or another? Unless you know for a fact that he is cheating I would not start thinking in these terms. Once a person begins to believe a spouse is cheating things happen and sooner or later the marriage is over and it could be that he or she was never cheating in the first place. That would be a shame to think you lost someone over nothing. It sounds to me your huband is committed to you and loves you very much. I can't think he is cheating on you unless he is a good actor and should be given an academy award for his performance. Be careful what you do or say. If he is not going out then if he is having an affair he must be having it at work and that is hard to believe because most people who do have affairs with coworkers will at some point be out with them somewhere outside of work at some time. For now I think you should believe that he is faithful to you until such time as you have a real reason to doubt him.

Answer 3

If he does not want to leave you and if he is really good at it, yes, I think he can do all that and is still cheating. I don't think you are creating problems for yourself, instead I think you got clues from his words or body language. Inspite the fact that he stays home after work he may still have affairs during work time. Believe your own instinct, and common sense too.
Of course, there is always a possibility that he is not having an affair, but not completely honest with you about something else, which might be the reason you question him. These "something else" may not be something of your interest/importance, but he is not comfortable to talk to you.
There are many ways to find out, such as hiring a detective, using electronic tracing device, stake out yourself. But none of these is respectful of your husband, and if he finds out, it could creat very serious problems between you two. A discreet way is to get to know his female coworkers, either through him (ask him if he'd like to introduce one or two to you), or through other ways you can manage. You can also pay a visit during his working hour, invite his coworkers over for a party, etc.. Afterall, the more you know his coworkers the more source you'll have. And you are doing this not necessarily for your "detective" purpose but also a good social tactic for yourself.
Good luck.

Answer 4

IF? I had a square anus...I would have square bowels.

Your husband would have sex with you twice a day; play kissy face with you; you would beg him to stop cuddling you; he would never argue with you; He would say "Yes I cheat on you and will never stop"; your fears are correct he is fornicating with the plant at the plant, one day the tulips another day the roses (sorry have no idea what a "seutary" is), should it be a desk or table he is having sex with it after the plant, which he also waters every day. When he stops working 12/7, playing video games 12/7, and craves female co-workers when not having sex with you---Honey then he is cheating on you, you will know by examining his under wear for pubic hairs and semen stains.

Answer 5

The man whom you have an affair with will always be loyal to his wife. He won't leave her his just having fun with you. His love for you will fade eventually but not to his wife. So you better be prepared when that time comes coz it will really drives you crazy. A man uses another woman for their own advantage at the moment this man is in love with you but not til the end you'll soon know when time get rough. An affair to a married man is only temporary happiness and it won't last. Look after yourself before it's too late.

Answer 6

Oh yeah, they can do all those things.....hard to imagine but think of it like this: some men are highly skilled in charming women, they are loving, say everything you love to hear that makes you feel secure....they know how to play the part probably because they love romance. There are a lot of ways you could find out but few would prove beyond a shadow of a doubt he is guilty.
If he is, then seeing that you still have a healthy sex life, and he seems to be very loving towards you it isn't as if he is doing it to be hurtful to you, nor does it mean at all that he dosen't love you. A fact that most of my friends will not even consider facing is that most men do cheat or would given the opportunity, I myself would rathar know. Sexual psychology will tell you undoubtedly men can have sex without any emotional attachments, so it is not to them or as they see it what can literally tear a female tp pieces or break her heart. I don't want my boyfriend to cheat on me however I like to live in reality, and prefer that we have open enough communication that if he did, or had the desire he could tell me without fearing I'd turn into a psycho. On the other hand, if he were having sexual relations with another woman, I do want to be fully aware of where they stand, if it is merely just a sexual thing I can handle that but should she become a threat to our relationship or I see that he starts to prefer her company over mine thats when it is time to decide "me or her". If a guy is going to cheat you really cannot stop him, only make him miserable, harrassed leading to what he will feel is you pushing him away---which will push him right to her.....so I don't know what your take on it is, but do realize I am not in agreement with any of my girlfriends. Although I am aware that at least half of them have cheating husbands/boyfriends, as long as they don't know they seem okay thinking he wouldn't do it.

Answer 7

My friends husband was the greatest guy I knew. I envied her for the perfect relationship they had. He always was so affectionate, and always home, and always so loving. Then one day she got his cell phone bill and it was high. So she looked at the entire bill and found out he was having an affair with a woman at the same company. Texting and calling eachother from work and every chance he got while my friends back was turned after work. You never can tell. If he has a cell phone, that would be the way to find out.

Answer 8

I'm trying to understand why you think he is cheating. From what you wrote, you sound paranoid. If you keep asking him "are you cheating," he will get tired of it eventually. It might even lead him to be unfaithful when he normally wouldn't have been.

Why do you suspect this? Has someone said something to you? Are you sure he is really going to work 7 days a week? It's not common to really work every single day ...

Answer 9

Anyone can be a good lier. I 'm not sayin gyour husband is cheating and since he is home with you all the time it's probablny not likley, but I had a boyfriend who use to cheated on me and would lie right to my face. Not until abot a year after we broke up did he actaully admit it. I think you should stop bugging your husband about it or he may just have an affair since you already accuse him so much.

Answer 10

Sometimes the obvious signs aren't there. You don't necessarily need to not be getting along for him to cheat. What you should look for though are changes in his habits. New clothes or cologne. If he stays late after work or works weekends regularly. If the only time he could be doing anything like that is after work start calling him everyday right when he gets off to see what he is doing.