Me and a friend who I liked for a few years have not spoke for many months. She felt that because of my feelings it made it hard for us to be friends. It's a long story, but there were times in which she told me she liked me, and this obviously made it hard for me when in the end she decided she didn't want me. Anyway, so after recieving an email from her saying to never contact her again, about a month ago, she sent me a message, just to say hi, and to say that she hoped all is well. This was hard for me, as I never thought I would ever hear from her again. I replied in a nice way and just left it at that. I also know she has since met someone else which obviously hurts but if she is happy then it im happy for her. As it is getting to that xmas time of year, I don't know if I should just send her a message wishing her and her family a happy xmas etc, or if I should just leave it or not. I miss her, but don't want to complicate things in any way. Maybe leaving it is for the best?
2006-12-22 04:18:17 · 37 answers · asked by Mr looking for answers 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Saying Merry Christmas is nothing overly commited, do it. It might free you a bit to send her that simple universal message.
2006-12-22 06:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by Nini 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are ritght.
Don't go chasing after her.
You could all three end up miserable and in a very difficult situation.
Plus if she only sees you as a friend when you obviously would want more from her, it will only makes things worst for you to keep in touch with her.
I think you should try and move on.
If she then decides to contact you because she eventually made up her mind, AND that you are still available fine.
If not, then it would have been for the best.
Besides, if and when she makes further contact, you're already in a relationship, it will definitely help you know for sure how you feel about her;
Because, she may definitely be past history in reality.
Good luck.
2006-12-22 04:25:07 · answer #2 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I think you should atleast be civil with her and tell her merry xmas and you never know...she might have contacted you because she is feeling the same right now too. No one can answer that but the two of you. I would just send her a message like that and see what she responds with.
2006-12-22 04:22:24 · answer #3 · answered by Believe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said that she said "Hi" a month ago and she hoped you were well?
Wishing her Merry Christmas is fine, but don't say anything more than what would be in a friendly greeting card. You won't complicate things unless you send an email baring your soul to her. She cares about you as a person but not as anything more.
2006-12-22 04:23:23 · answer #4 · answered by Jess B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been there done that and worn the t shirt.
I know how you feel, i lost touch with the love of my life for 25 years and finally met up again after a lot of research on my part, i have loved her all that time and still do but after making contact again after all those years we moved in together and it lasted just one year, we were not suited after all, now we stay in touch as friends but just cannot live together.
so what i am saying is, your desires and dreams for being with this person may seem all rosy in your mind but if you did make contact be prepared for dissapointment and you would also be upsetting her present relationship. the grass is always greener on the other side until you get there and find it's covered in crap.
make a life for yourself and get on with it, put this person to the back of your mind, if it is ever meant to be then it will be.trust in your self.
by all means send a greeting and apart from that let her know you will always be there for her but meantime get on and build your own life. i am doing just that now but it's difficult to overcome an obsession i have held for nearly 30 years now. i have proved to myself it doesnt work and i've wasted all those years wondering and finally making my "dream" come true.
have a great new year and let me know how you get on, simon m.
2006-12-22 04:31:08 · answer #5 · answered by matured 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should leave it.
If she contacts you to say happy xmas, respond and wish her the same.
I think you would make yourself feel even more vulnerable if you made the first move on this.
Have a happy christmas :-)
Hope you find someone who's right for you in the new year.
2006-12-22 04:25:35 · answer #6 · answered by mcfifi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What could it hurt sending her a card saying Merry X-mas? She may be happy to hear from you and see how you have been lately.... I would go for it and see where it leads maybe to a new friendship...... Remember she prolly said what she did because she was mad and now she is wanting to speak with you again....
Good Luck an Merry X-mas
2006-12-22 04:23:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She contacted you first after telling you never to speak to her again so I see no harm in wishing her happy holidays. However, if it's too hard for you to talk to her and actually let go then I'd leave it alone and move on with your life.
2006-12-22 04:22:54 · answer #8 · answered by d_magical_s_sweetness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell her Merry Christmas. If you send out Christmas cards to people, put her on your list. If not, send a text or tell her face to face. It's the holiday's, a time to catch up with old friends. Tell Her!
2006-12-22 04:25:17 · answer #9 · answered by warriorchic84 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r saying that everytime u recieve a msg from her it is hurting u....right? well u have to decide if u can handle it when u get a reply from her wishing u the same.... there is nothing wrong in wishing someone u care about happy holidays.... just don't let it get to u.... take light....
2006-12-22 04:26:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋