My ex and I have been divorced for 9 years. Every year during the holidays it is a huge fight. We can't ever agree on the arrangements. We have a court order, but we can't seem to agree on even that. Our children are getting older and I think they can make up their own mind where they want to spend the holidays. My husband thinks we should still go by the court order. Does anyone else have these problems?
2006-12-22 03:35:06 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Unfortunately, if he is unwilling to work with you on this and go along with what the children want. You must go along with the court order. He could very well drag you into court and have you charged with contempt of court. very sad, that after all of this time he can not be a little more accommodating. After all it really is about the children, he should put their interests above his own. However, it appears this is not going to happen so you will just have to explain this to the children and go with the flow. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Have a blessed Christmas and a joyous New Year! God bless****
2006-12-22 03:40:09 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the bi-products of the broken court system. I have one child and is 13 years old. I have taken the stand of "dropping the rope" that is I will not fight where my child is being pulled. I would rather have time that is pleasant for all even if it has to be a different time than what is on the calender.
It is not in the child's best interest to be pulled but as they grow older they will make their own decisions where to go and who to see like we all do. The best way is to plan before the holidays and always ask yourself... If this is fair then I should be able to switch the names and dates with my ex spouse and feel good about it. Always try to see things from your ex's point of view and maybe the fighting over the holidays will be a little less stressful.
Good luck
2006-12-22 13:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by chancesare45 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, well in a way I got divorce almost 6 yrs ago but my ex- doesn't visit our daugther much and we really don't figth over Christmas or new years eve she will grow and she will decide later on where to spend holidays.. I wish he could visit her more it is her daugther too.. In the other side my hubby has being divorce for almost 8 yrs and he always has problems with his EX his son is now 10 and this December will be a year since he haven't see him because of her. His son lives 14hrs away and 2 times he have gone to look for him with no luck because she wants for her son to think that his dad doesn't care for him and my hubby is planning to taking her to court to either fix this up or try to get custody of the boy !!! But unfortunately in after a divorce most of the times the problems continue but it is not the kids fault they will grow and will be able to make their own decisions on where and with who spend the holidays !!!!! GOOD LUCK AND BEST WISHES !!! HAVE A FUN CHRISTMAS!!!
2006-12-22 11:55:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep.. I hear ya! I have decided to let my daughter decide where she wants to be. I hate it, but it is better than her coming along and putting on the long face. I told her that I have decided to let her make up her mind where she wants to be. I am not going to deal with the "drama" anymore. I do not live a life like that and won't be with Then again, we have gone through lots of $$$. .. lots of time in court. My current husband and I have our children to raise as well, and i have decided that she will not display such attitute and rudeness in their presence anymore. She knows I love her, I continue to pay child support without missing a beat. --- Good luck! --
2006-12-22 11:54:24 · answer #4 · answered by Denise 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋