I handle the bills and try to be conservative with money with one income and a family of five. He started playing poker and said he's going every week no matter what I think. He said spending $10 weekly is no big deal, and laughed at my seriousness of the matter. I can understand going twice a month or on occasion but I think he is being selfish. What do you think?
2006-12-22 01:13:51 · 14 answers · asked by Teddy Bear 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It all depends on how much you really have to spare. If that extra $40 a month is really going to make a huge difference for you, then I would just calmly approach him and tell him what kind of financial situation you are in, and ask him if he could go less often, maybe only once a month. Perhaps he could find some people who play poker with no money involved (play with poker chips, etc.)
Also, if he is the bread-winner of the family he may feel like that means that he is more entitled to spend it. In my opinion, this thought is incorrect. While traditionally the man has been the financial guardian of the marriage, it is my experience that men can often times be worse with money than women. Perhaps you should suggest to him that if he wants to spend all the money, that maybe he should pay the bills as well. Maybe he doesn't realize exactly how tight your budget really is and seeing it first-hand would be the best way for him to come to this realization.
Good luck with the future and congratulations on a wonderful family!
2006-12-22 01:22:39 · answer #1 · answered by chad5871 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your budget is that close for $10.00 a week to be a big deal. Something is wrong. If he works hard all week that is less money that you would spend at McDonald's. If he has an evening out and is having a good time for $10.00, let him enjoy it. If you are not working, maybe you should if your budget is that close. He sounds like he provides for you and may not want you to work. Can you do something at home to make money so your budget can be a little more flexible. Go over the budget with him and see where you can give him this $40.00 a month with out fighting. Don't eat out one or two days at lunch . He needs to have an evening out after working all week and this is not excessive.
Good luck.
2006-12-22 09:45:01 · answer #2 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how dire your financial situation is. If you are having problems paying the bills and need every penny then yes, he should be more considerate. BUT, if you have disposable income and the $10 per week really does not effect you then dont be so harsh. Be happy that he is out playing poker, he could be out playing hide the sausage.
2006-12-22 09:38:48 · answer #3 · answered by d b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait a minute...here's the question. Does he work or do you? Do you have kids? If your husband works all week and he enjoys going out with a friend and spending 10 bucks on poker, and you dont like it, you're the selfish one. That wouldnt fly in my house. Get your lazy *** off the couch, stop whining about financials, and go get a job.
2006-12-22 09:22:28 · answer #4 · answered by Elephant rider 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tammi,
It's important for your husband to develop relationships with other men. It's called male bonding. Who knows someone may show up at the poker game that may offer him a better job. Remember no man is an island. the more contacts someone has the more opportunities may open for a better income. Remember the old saying. It's not what you know, It's who you know. besides he needs his space.
2006-12-22 09:23:22 · answer #5 · answered by krzylove 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he's playing with fire. If he loses his $10, and keeps gambling, will he owe someone money that you can't afford to lose?
You don't give a lot of information here, but it sounds to me that there are one or maybe two things going one here - he may have a gambling problem, and you two may have a problem in your marriage where you're not communicating or not taking each others concerns seriously. I'm no Dr. Phil, but I think you have some issues to work out.
2006-12-22 09:20:45 · answer #6 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that $10 per week is reasonable as long as he does not lose more money when he plays poker. It should be his money to do what he wants with.
2006-12-22 09:33:36 · answer #7 · answered by Stareyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If a bill doesn't get paid because he took the money for poker night, hand him the bill and tell him he can figure out a way to pay it.
2006-12-22 09:20:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
$10 turns into $20 and more.
However, $10 a week for entertainment is not a lot to give to a spouse who works all week to take care of the family. I just hope he is responsible. Most family men who drink, drink more than that in a couple of days as well as family men who smoke.
2006-12-22 09:17:34 · answer #9 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who makes the Money? If you don't then you have no say. If you don't like it get a low paying job that covers half of the Daycare bill go further in Debt and end up Bankraupt!! If not then stop Whining!!
2006-12-22 09:21:58 · answer #10 · answered by ballman4425 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋