How to trust your husband?

Question

What would you do if your 'trustworthy' husband has been receiving and sending 'very friendly' messages from another woman on his mobile and denies being unfaithful when confronted? Before he was confronted, he would come back late most of the time and blame it on work. He don't even answer his mobile when called by my kids or myself. I cannot leave him as I am financially dependent on him. I have tried to get a job but failed eventhough I have a degree... I cannot afford to hire a P.I. as they are too expensive.... Help!! : (

Answer 1

Womens intuition is a very powerful thing. If you are getting that feeling, and by asking this question you are, then you should trust yourself. I hate hearing about women who become so dependant on their husband that they get 'stuck' in a relationship, it's sad. My father past away when I was 3 and left my mother alone with no one to depend on. She was in a new country and didn't even know the language and still she was determined to survive. If she can do it, you can to. My mother has always told me to never depend on a man. A women has to be able to stand on her own two feet. She even told me that I should have my own bank account without him knowing about it...just in case. To this day, my mother still has her bank account that my stepfather doesnt know about. Back to your situation...like I said if you are getting that feeling deep in the pit of your stomach then trust yourself. You don't need to hire a fancy PI...do you have some girls friends? Have one of them spy on him...it's kinda messed up but you sound like you know hes up to something but you need to have proof in order to fully believe it. Maybe pop up at his office for lunch one day, don't act suspicious, act like you went to surprise your husband. Have you seen his work environment? You need to be your own PI, you know your husband better than anyone. You have a right to know what the heck your husband is up to, whatever it is. Good Luck! I hope I helped even a little.

Answer 2

If you can hirer a PI then you can move out. You are making excuses why you have to stay in this unhealthy relationship. If you dont have the money to move out how are you benefiting from not working? What can a PI tell you that you dont already know? Just because things didnt work out at this job doesnt mean that thats the only job in the world. Now you dont want to leave him but what if he leaves you? What would you do? Do you think this woman is a co-worker? HELLO GET A JOB..

Answer 3

You shouldn't tolerate any communications between him and another woman. You can demand to see the cell phone bill, it has a list of all calls for the month. See for yourself how many times he has recieved calls from the homewrecking tramp. Too many tramps out there to keep a marriage intact. That is why I'm divorced. No more hassles!
Good Luck and it might be time to go job hunting again. Independence is our BEST defence against assholes.

Answer 4

If you could get paid for making excuses you'd be rich.Your husband is cheating and you know it,either you will shut up and take your kicking like a dog,who will fight back if provoked or you'll woman up and call him on his behavior.Too bad if you don't have a job that you are qualified for,either you are going to demand respect from him or you're going to be kicked like an animal.Listen,you make it known you will leave penniless and work at a fast food joint before you settle for less than you signed on for.He needs to know that you will not continue to tolerate his t acts of selfishness any longer and mean it and leave him if you have to.Take any job to keep your sanity and you'll survive just like most of us who have gone through times in our marriages with kids or not,we do what we have to do to maintain our sanity.

Answer 5

Just assume that he is cheating. Because he is. The problem is your relationship. You need to not confront him about cheating but confront him about the fact that you want a better relationship. You have to develop an option to leave. I mean do you really want to stay with him forever and he is cheating. What will you do if he leaves you? You need to get your option going to you don't feel trapped. Forget about proving he's cheating. It doesn't matter, He knows he is and you know he is. Just tell him unless he lets you explore his cell phone you will just assume he's cheating and go from there. You dont' have to prove it to him, he already knows. Finding out for "sure" doesn't matter.

Answer 6

DO NOT MOVE OUT until you are financially able to take care of yourself and your kids, so go back out and try finding a job again, it takes time.

You will need to put money aside for an attorney, rent, car, car insurance, etc.

P.S. My parents went through this for a short period of time. He changed his mind and stayed with my mother. They have now been married for 48 years.

Best of luck

Answer 7

Just let him taste his own medicine, how ? Simple, yourself also can have affair with other man, do almost the same things like him. As a man, I'll can tell you that no matter what he will not tolerate this. Thus, you can take this opportunity to bring out your hubby affair and settle with him.

Answer 8

Have a friend follow him for a few days. Or borrow a car and follow him yourself. Also confront the woman and ask her why she is so intrested in your husband

Answer 9

there is no relationship if there is no trust
so what u need to do is sit down and talk to him about it and how u r feeling
tip: if he gets angry when u ask him that means he is because if he's not cheating he should not get angry
another tip:when u mention it look at his first reaction because a person can hide the first and third reaction but the first is always true so look at that reaction if he looks surprised Hun hes liein

Answer 10

he is probably cheating on you, try to confront him, or perhaps try to find a job and leave him. good luck