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My partner is polish, and is spending xmas eve with other polish who do not speak english for dinner at 6pm. Then off to mass in a polish church at 12pm. This is really not my scene, and I have always had a night out on this day. Its our first xmas together. Do you think its right to do hat I want to do? or should I break the habit of a lifetime and go to church?

2006-12-21 20:12:50 · 20 answers · asked by amber79 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

20 answers

Personally I think u should stick it out and go to church with ur partner.

2006-12-21 20:15:06 · answer #1 · answered by 5 · 0 3

You partner is always going to have a polish background just like you will have your own - it is good to try and find a way to celebrate each of your backgrounds together. This first year together at Christmas would be a good time to start celebrating the polishness. Express your nervousness but be supportive. As for going to church, most churches expect people like you and make a special effort to welcome you. Always remember that many churchgoers struggle with their beliefs at times - it is not easy to be a church attender - you will not be alone. Be together and enjoy having someone to be close to at Christmas.

Best wishes to you both

2006-12-22 04:40:43 · answer #2 · answered by Oldie from Bristol 2 · 1 0

Me and my ex spend last xmas apart,as well as new years eve.....
Back then it all made sense for me......He made plans for xmas in summer, before we even started going out. He had to work on new years eve, and of course he would have a few drinks with colleagues after work!No big deal it all seemed kinda fair.
Now, I know he just did not care enough to spend xmas with me!!
I am not saying it is the same in with your partner,but little things like that are quite important in relationships. Does your partner want you to spend xmas with them?????If you really think they do, then just go for it!!Even if you do not like,make a sacrifice this once, and next xmas you both can do it your way....That's what xmas is about love, sharing, sacrifice

2006-12-22 04:54:11 · answer #3 · answered by NG 3 · 1 0

u mean smth is open at the place where u live on the christmas night? u re a lucky one. where i live (europe) everything is closed on christmas eve and the next day. but i think it is always right to do what u want to do, the stuff u will enjoy most. in that case u will remain happy and won't blame anyone for spoiled time.merry christmas. have fun

ps. it is no good to start relationships with sacrifices. people should do what they want and stay together not cos they re doing sacrifices, but because they like being with each other

2006-12-22 05:23:00 · answer #4 · answered by jacky 6 · 1 0

go on to the polish party and enjoy yourself...
my wife is italian and none of her family speak english.. first time i went to a family party i had a great time..
i am sure your partner will not leave you all on your lonesome..
don't you know any polish?
yasshi massh.. think my spelling is a little poor there?
experience another cultures xmas instead of going out and getting leathered and feeling ill the next day....
what do poles have for xmas dinner?

BOZE NARODZENIE... MERRY CHRISTMAS

2006-12-22 04:37:04 · answer #5 · answered by lion of judah 5 · 1 0

If you go to church with him he will gain more respect for you because he will realize that you love him enough to share something that meaningful with him. He knows you don't speak the language. Maybe next year he will reciprocate by doing what you want to do and so on.

Relationships that last need compromises, it won't kill you to do this for him, its only a few hours out of your lives and it could make a difference for many years to come.

2006-12-22 12:23:24 · answer #6 · answered by unknown friend 7 · 0 0

Amber,
going to church just because your partners going is not the right reason. Go by all means, but beacuse you want to be there for the service and NOT for your partners company.
I am a Pagan by religion,but I would not be a Pagan only beacuse my wife was one. I am a Pagan because it feels right for me to be so.
Don't break the habit of a lifetime, go and have some fun.

2006-12-22 04:23:49 · answer #7 · answered by The Alchemist 4 · 1 0

maybe u could talk to him about . u could find the golden middle way ... if u are going tell him that its not what u like but u do it because u dont want to be apart from him on this day .
just make sure that this wont become a habbit , he must accept ur wants the same .
have a nice xmas

2006-12-22 04:19:44 · answer #8 · answered by athina68 4 · 1 0

If this is your first Christmas together I think you should make the effort. It's only one evening - you'll have lots of other evenings to do things you want to do.

And you never know, you might enjoy doing something new and different.

I think your partner would really appreciate you making the effort. It must be hard to be so far away from home at Christmas.

Have a good one anyway :-)

2006-12-22 04:18:10 · answer #9 · answered by mcfifi 6 · 0 1

Okay, if you are heading toward a commitment with your partner then it shows your love and respect for you to meet their friends and honor their traditions. If it's just a casual affair between you two, then it's negotiable. Ask what your partner prefers, then gently tell them what you would prefer, and suggest a vote.



If you do go, you can have a blast by listening to polish and seeing if you can figure out what they are saying. It can be fun to listen like you understand, then say just any old thing, as if you were responding appropriately.

2006-12-22 04:22:26 · answer #10 · answered by musemessmer 6 · 1 1

It really depends on how you feel about him. If it could be love, go to church, but ask him to do something in your culture on another evening. If you are not sure about him, this could be the parting of the ways

2006-12-26 02:41:50 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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