I have bn seeing this married guy for a year. We work together.He used to enjoy my company and share alot of things with me. Recently my colleagues got to know we are together. From then on, he is very cold to me. He even hinted that we have to be careful when we go out in case someone sees us. I had many times wanted to break off with him but he is difficult. i have stopped calling him. But we still need to work together, which is even harder for me. I am not going to leave my job, thats for sure.. i even questioned him but he refuses to open up. i am confused.???
2006-12-21 19:39:16 · 17 answers · asked by mambo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There's not a whole lot to be confused about. Let's see. He's married. He wanted to have an affair and you volunteered for that position. He got found out. He is embarrassed and wants to keep your fling discreet. Chances are, he will find his next volunteer. Go to work and ignore him and it would be good if you stayed away from married men, especially those you work with.
2006-12-21 19:45:45 · answer #1 · answered by 2sweet 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know it's hard. But you have to know that for his wife it would be much, but much more painful if she would know about it. And if he has kinds, well his children would suffer terribly and they would probabily hate you for the rest of their life. Trust me, I have been through this...
But it seems now that you just started to become a victim of this man, who is actually playing on you to know! First stop the relationship whatever happens! It's hard now, but with time when you will look back you will know that you did the right thing. Find a guy who is not married or have a relationship. And about your work, of course you won't let your job just for a man!Talk and do everything with him as nothing ever happened! Be even colder that he is to you! And about you, try to have fun! Hang out with friends, eat a big pizza, have fun! Good luck!
2006-12-21 19:46:01 · answer #2 · answered by asking_girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seeing a married man is not encouraged. The looser will be you eventually. Working as colleagues makes it even harder to break-off. I suggest you just have the bit the bullet and move on. He doesn't want to be seen with you by the colleagues could be the colleagues may tell his wife or something umpleasant may happen to him or his job. He is being selfish. Drop me!
2006-12-21 19:44:10 · answer #3 · answered by SingGirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Huh...wonder why women always go for the married guy when there are perfectly good single men available.
He is avoiding you because he does not want to get caught by his wife or co-workers. Stop waisting your time and end the relationship. You need to relocate to a different department or get a new job. A job is not more important then your happiness.
2006-12-21 22:07:36 · answer #4 · answered by Neo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is so important. This is a serious red flag. I would say maybe relationship/ premaritial counseling would be helpful. It would add an objective voice to encourage him to talk and give him strategies for expressing himself. The Bible says don't let the sun go down on your wrath. You really shouldn't go to be angry in a relationship...it gives too much time for issues to fester. Maybe he needs some cool down time to get his thoughts together and be able to express them without emotion, but at some point THAT DAY he needs to be able to come out of his shell and talk to you. Maybe using email would help to.
2016-05-23 14:13:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are looking to spend your life with him legally, then forget it. It would be difficult but not impossible to get out of this relationship. Ask him openly what his intentions are? Tell him either to have you or his wife? If he is not positive, tell him good bye. Remember the more you drag it, more difficult it would be for you to get out of this. Most chances are that he will not leave his family for you, and you will have nothing except loneliness and pain, the day he breaks off from you.
Be brave, you will make it, believe me
2006-12-21 20:28:15 · answer #6 · answered by regatta 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Begin dating other people. Give yourself more options. I've seen women strung along like this before. In one instance, the "second lady" found out that the guy had yet another "second". The guy isn't going to make a move as long as he has what he wants.
2006-12-21 20:49:25 · answer #7 · answered by mojonah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you so worried about it...Think about him and his wife, He is a jerk for doing that to her, and you aren't exactly an angel either. Try dating someone worth your time and effort, don't you eventually want to be married and all of that too? and probably not to this guy either, If he cheats on her, He will cheat on you too. Good luck.
2006-12-22 04:38:51 · answer #8 · answered by Rhonda M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think that you should just go on with your life just tell how you feel. I mean if he truly loves you he will understand and try to make thing's work.But if he doesn't then it means that he is just using you and only needs you when he wants something that is all. You guys have been together for a year he should tell you something.. I hoped I helped..
2006-12-21 20:00:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
What part of "married man" do you NOT understand?
Being married means a commitment of of love, honor and faithfulness. He promised this to her......and you think it is ok for you to be messing with him??????
Believe me.....if he cheats WITH you, he will cheat ON you.
The guy used you big time.
No need to give up your job......just give up him.....unless you enjoy being the office slut.
2006-12-21 19:59:08 · answer #10 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋