Question on virgin for the Americans..?

Question

yes, I am a 23 year old virgin, nationality- Indian living in HK. I'm a modern girl with an open mind and I have been dating since 3 years. This question is particularly for the Americans. Now, I watch a lot of American TV serials, desp housewives, friends, that 70's shows etc and I'm totally hooked on. I've been to the states before and had a really good time. My question is why do you guys make such a big deal of being a virgin? I mean (as they show on TV) if youre a virgin at 18 youre made fun of and it is just NOT a normal phenomena. Can anyone explain?

Answer 1

it's the sad part of our society...celebrities dont help the cause either

Answer 2

Our society, at least it's roots, is based on a puritanical values base. It would seem, then, that virginity would be a valued condition, but the puritan values push too far away from anything enjoyable and the natural reaction is to push back just as hard. In other words, we're a society of contrasts and conflicts.

Personally, I have no regrets about the extensive sexual activity I experienced prior to getting married. As wonderful as my wife was, sexually, I still would have always wondered what it would have been like to be with other people. This way, I don't have to wonder. This was not an issue for me since I placed no value on virginity; it's a socially defined value that has little to do with nature.

In America, sex sells. That's why you see it plastered all over the media. The few people that think virginity is important tend to be lower on the education rung in this country and those of us that recognize the artificial nature of virginity tend to look down on people who try to sell us virginity.

One thing is for sure, we support anyone who chooses to remain virgin until marriage. It's their business, not ours.

Answer 3

Only the sadder parts of our society make a big negative deal. Virginity is a choice for most in the US. And for some reason Hollywood has decided to make it be viewed in a bad light. Most of the US depend on TV to decide their morals seeing as the majority of homes now have TVs and more and more children are using them (their programming) to decide what their morals are, rather than listening to their parents (some who don't exactly show the best in morals either).

Personally, I'm one who'd rather save myself for that special love. There are however those who would rather be 'ready' for them. I'm not saying either are bad or good. They're personal choices made (most likely) for personal reasons. My reason is the rise of STD's, and that I was raised by my mother instead of a TV.

Answer 4

Cause most people here give it away and dont care about making sex and love something special reserved for your husband or wife. I am a american virgin in america and unfortunately this is how most americans look at virginity. Love means nothing here, its all about the sex, they want as much selfish pleasure as they could get. Believe me it isnt just the guys here, the women are probably even worse in this part.

Answer 5

Because here in America we find any reason we possibly can to make fun of people, including their status as a virgin/non-virgin. Also, sex is so common that it's odd not to have sex by the age of 18 or especially 20+.

Answer 6

There are some slow actors and some fast ones and this description do not fit all virgins in the American culture. This is from a woman point of view as I am not a man.

Answer 7

made fun of hell. You're Idolized by the guys. The girls don't like you because the guys want you so bad. Virgins just don't exist after 14-15 yrs of age around here.

Although I did hear a rumor about an American virgin, 24 yrs old, last month. I'm gathering a posse now to go see if we can find her.

Answer 8

Our society is very sex-centered. Our ads are sexual, our movies are sexual, our TV shows are sexual, etc. Young people want to live up to whatthey see in the media and the people they idolize. The media says sexy is good and desirable, so young women try to be sexy so they can be considered desirable by men, because that, in many ways, is how women feel they are measured. The pressure on young men comes from adolescent male society, which places heavy emphasis on not being a sissy. Men who haven't gone all the way with a girl are considered less manly. Its mostly peer pressure. Sex is considered in a way a rite of passage.

Answer 9

Varsha, please remember that these shows are from hollywood. They are not real.
America was founded by emigrant (pilgrims) who wanted their religious freedom (in Europe) but forced their ways on everybody else. They were fanatics about modesty and church attendance and following the rules in the bible. Four hundred years later, we are still having problems being open minded about sex and still following all the preaching from our fore fathers.
Americans who are still virgins are considered 'too religious' by their peers (teens or adults) and those who have sex indiscriminately are considered sluts and playboys. Now how the heck do you compare real life to movies?? Is it how we want to be?? Can't answer that for anybody else. Every where you look, you'll see 'sex' used in commercials - for everything from cars to vacuum cleaners. How kids in this country stay virgins is beyond me. The pressure is there -- all the time - so i can I must congratulate them for holding on to their principles.

Answer 10

If people make fun of you, don't listen. I've always told my daughter that her virginity is the ONLY thing that once you lose, you can NEVER get it back. Your parents raised you well. Do what makes you happy. There's nothing wrong with being a virgin or not, it's just a personnal decision

Answer 11

the average american loses their virginity between ages 15 & 17. Some people think that if you haven't by the time you're 20 or so, then its because you couldnt find anyone who wanted to have sex with you.